9 In the dead of night

Caleb's POV

Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I instructed my driver, Steve, to take me to the office before going home.

Even though I told myself that I was making this detour to drop off the confidential documents there, I subconsciously knew that wasn't the only reason.

I just didn't want to go back to that empty tomb of a home yet. The very reason I had taken this job was because it came with a promise of travelling.

It wasn't that I was particularly fond of it. Infact, flying still made my stomach clench like it used to when I was younger. But it felt like a better option than spending so much time inside the house.

After working in CrossRoads Software Solutions with my father for 5 years, this work seemed like an amateur's job.

Sure InfoWeb Softwares was an up-and-coming company and gave me the escape I had wanted from being anywhere around Callahan Cross' accusing gaze, but it did nothing to keep me as busy as I was used to.

Or as mentally preoccupied as I had wanted to be. And as if the shit that usually ran through my head wasn't enough, it still managed to make space for a certain enticing woman that was my assistant.

It had been 2 weeks since the Halloween party and our subsequent battle of wills at my home. And even though I had been in Seattle on and off for all this time, Ruth had somehow managed to stay on my mind all through it.

It felt like there was some unfinished business between us. Something unspoken that ran like undercurrents every time we were in front of each other. I didn't understand my obsession with her, really. She was hot as hell and I was definitely attracted to her, yes.

But never in my life had a girl ever nagged my thoughts like an ever present shadow that travelled with me everywhere I went. It irked me. It aroused me. It made me curious. But more than anything else, it made me want to give it back to her in kind.

In all the times I had seen her at work in the last 2 weeks, she had been coldly professional. Talking to the point, getting the work done and moving on.

Never in all this time did it seem like there was ever a time she even thought about what had passed between us that evening. Because, regardless of how it had ended, neither of us could denied the intensely hot chemistry we had.

And it pissed me off that while I obsessed over it about every waking hour, she seemed to have moved on.

As the car stopped in front of the dark building, I sighed, grunting like a 60 year old guy as I got out of it.

With my eyes on the papers I had came here to drop by, I told my driver, "I'll be back in a minute, Steve."

Nodding, he replied, "Just in time for your birthday, Sonny" making me freeze.

Steve was a 50-something, jolly kind of guy who had been with me for 4 years now. And it wasnt like he had never wished me on my birthday before. It was just that his statement took me so by surprise that it brought forth a reminder in my mind, making sweat crawl down my back.

A reminder that for some, unknown reason I didn't celebrate my birthdays anymore.

I swallowed hard as a shiver ran through me and I had to grit my teeth to supress the reaction those words caused.

Quickly making my way to the partially dark building, I cracked my neck and cursed myself to still be affected by such a small thing.

I had worked hard to leave those triggers behind, and I will not let it all go to waste now, damnit.

I was thankful that it was close to midnight and the office was empty, save for a developer here and there. It felt like a blessing as I didn't think I was fit for company just yet.

I loudly cursed myself when my hand shook while pressing the elevator button and ran a shaky hand through my hairs.

Even though I tried to ignore it, that old trigger had managed to make my insides shiver, and the urge to inflict pain upon myself was slowly taking over.

Just as I was about banging my fist against the metal walls, the doors slid open silently, letting the air and some reason slither back into my brain.

I walked out, making my way to the cabin still in my self-destructive mode and managed to drop the papers onto my desk before leaving.

Just as I was about to round the corner to the bank of elevators again, a dim light coming from a cubical made me pause.

Frowning, I involuntarily stepped towards the light, letting the curiosity distract me from my current mood.

The second my gaze fell on her, it felt like darkness that was spreading like poison within me paused.

My feet stopped moving on their own accord as I stared at her olive skin that seemed to be glowing in the dark.

Her presence was pushing the darkness away, and it unsettled me to feel that in her presence.

This wasn't supposed to happen. I wasn't supposed to get relief. I was supposed to be punished, even though I didn't know for what.

I had no idea what I felt this gut-wrenching guilt for.

"Subconscious guilt," my psychologist had called it.

"Feeling varying degrees of guilt over something that we must have done in the past, but have no conscious memory of."

All I knew was I just had to go through this pain whenever something triggered it and didn't deserve something that had the capacity of reducing my suffering.

But no matter how much I rejected the effect her presence had on me, I couldn't help but stay rooted on the spot and stare at her.

I had never been particularly attracted to full-figured women before. They were attractive of course, but it wasn't specific choice for me.

And yet I couldn't help but trace her frown of concentration with my gaze. She sat with one of her hands tucked delicately under her chin, both her legs tucked under her on the chair.

Her eyes were obstructed by a pair of huge glasses I had never seen her wear before and her hairs were in a messy bun at the back of her head.

She was obviously not expecting anyone here at this time of night as she stood up and stretched, a moan escaping her throat.

I swallowed, knowing I looked like a creep standing here and watching her, but unable to move nonetheless.

There was a flux of emotions within me. Whether it was because of an almost emotion breakdown I just had, or something else, I didn't know.

All I knew was something was building within me, and it would be violently released at the slightest movement.

Picking up her overcoat, she tapped something in her phone and started walking towards me, just as my breathe started to speed up.

I felt prick of tears at the back of my eyes, and I gritted my teeth to keep them back just as she nearly collided with me in the darkness.

Startled, she opened her mouth to scream and on instinct, I pressed a palm onto her mouth, pushing her back against a pillar.

The scared look reflected in her eyes made me loosen my grip onto her waist and mouth. I hated the thought of doing something that could put that look in her eyes for me.

For a second, it seemed like she would bolt, but then her eyes adjusted to the darkness and she recognised me.

Breathing heavy, she eyed me looking utterly bewildered. Even as a small corner of my brain insisted that it wasn't a good idea, I hushed it and focused on curbing the darkness that was held at bay by one thread of control.

I barely registered her swallowing in nerves or her intently gazing into my eyes as I lowered my lips onto hers.

For a second, she didn't respond, rendered too stunned to react. I moved my lips onto hers, knowing my kiss had an edge of desperation, but even though I wanted to, I couldn't bring myself to use her like this.

As I made to pull away though, her fingers slipped into my hairs and she moved her lips over mine.

I could feel the darkness dispel off me as I felt her hand stroke my chest, my heart rate calming beneath her palm.

I felt her tongue circling my lips, asking entrance, but I held her off, not willing to use her anymore than I already was.

A desperate growl rose from her throat, and her hand grasped lapels of my jacket, pulling me closer.

Her teeth nipped my bottom lip angrily, drawing blood and I flinched, involuntarily giving her access to my mouth.

My taste buds exploded as her taste filled into my system, dominating over the coppery taste of my blood and I made to press myself more firmly into her warm body.

That was when the phone in her hand lit up with a ping. She didn't seem to notice and clawed at the back of my neck, pulling me closer.

But I registered it enough to clear my mind and stop the insanity I was about to do.

Forcing myself to pull away, I tamped down my natural instinct to complete what we had started, and stared at her quietly.

She made a moan of loss, frowning up at me, her bottom lip, smeared red from my blood, jutting out.

Pressing my thumb onto her lower lip one last time, I turned and thundered down the stairs, ignoring both, the elevators and my body demanding me to go back and finish what we had started.

Reaching my car, I managed to instruct Steve to go home without me. He looked confused, but something about my expression made him obey without any questions.

Standing in the shadow of a nearby trees, I waited like a stalker for a few minutes until I saw Ruth making her way out of the building.

I stood still until she got into her waiting cab then turned and took off running in the opposite direction.

Running away from my demons, and away from someone who could somehow keep them away.