It's Over

"I'm not leaving you this lifetime," Victor's determined words were enough to cause despair in my already troubled mind.

'He trusts me like no other,' I understood. Not only that... He wouldn't leave me.

Reality struck me out of fascination. I opened my eyes and stood in his embrace. The momentary happiness started to fade away and fear took its place.

If it was a few days ago, I would have considered keeping him close for the rest of my life. But with what I've found in the scroll, it seemed impossible.

Edward or the person behind this scroll might have plans to make him stand before the law of Astrana. They may already have proof against Victor. Honestly, proving Victor as the Dagresh's duke is not that hard with the amount of information given in the book. Catching one of his spies is enough to make him surrender.

If the royals of Astrana caught him, they had enough reasons to behead him. Now that Edward knows, every second in Astrana was dangerous for him. How am I supposed to keep him in Astrana?

'Victor cannot stay here in Astrana. I must send him back so that he would live,' I made up my mind. Sending him back to Dagresh was one of the hardest decisions to make since I had no idea how will I survive the dangers without him beside me. But at that moment, his well-being mattered the most.

Well, I was indeed in love.

I closed my eyes and listened to his heartbeats. For this heart to beat well for more years, I had to sacrifice my desire to be with him.

'I would be fine as long as he is,' I thought again.

Suddenly I opened my eyes realizing what I have been thinking. When did I fall for him this hard? When did he become the most important person to me? Sacrifice? True love? They were never really my things. I couldn't believe the change in me. Also, I couldn't help but blame him for it. Still, the immense satisfaction that filled my heart was pacifying.

'Is it what true love feels like?' I pondered. 'Does it have to happen now? Just when I had to part with him?' my eyes started to tear up. I swiftly turned my face and pressed the tears on his shirt so he wouldn't know. I raised my hand and hugged him back. Who knows? It might be my last chance to hug him.

With so much reluctance, I pulled myself together. I pulled out his subduing embrace. His tender eyes met with mine. I avoided looking at him and searched for my next words. Victor lifted his hand and stroked the back of my head and pressed a kiss on my forehead. He must have wanted to give me courage but it made me go even weaker.

I clutched one of his hand sleeves as I let out a sigh with determination.

"Victor," finally I called his name without looking up at his face.

"Mn," he hummed. He was still filled with love and passion, and it was all for me. How could I be selfish enough to let him die? He needs to leave me.

I had to say the words then.

"We can't be together," I said as I let go of his hand and took a step back.

When I lifted my head, I saw him frowning and squinting at me. His eyes were still glistening in the dark despite the confusion on his face. He looked nothing better than a child who just got lost. That way, he broke my heart.

"We have no future together," I averted my gaze.

"I don't understand" he muttered. "I thought, you..." he paused. "Do you want to marry that prince?" he asked dubiously.

It made me gaze at him speechless. I turned around and looked out the window. "I don't," I gave him the least validation he wanted. "But..." before I could say my next words, he had already reached me and hugged me from behind.

"It's enough. Don't play with me." he hugged me tightly. "I may have angered you before, but I really mean this."

I felt like something creeping inside my head. My head ached more than before. "Victor, let go," I harshly told him.

"Athena..." he paused. After a few seconds, he whispered right beside my ears. "I love you. So," he didn't sound better than me. He was equally pathetic just like me. "So, let's not part," he finished.

'Not now... not now, Victor...' I kept repeating in my mind. He shouldn't be saying that then. It only worsened the situation. He was making it hard for me.

I was at a loss for words for a few seconds. I was not sure how to respond.

"I'm not someone you should trust. I'm... I'm very much flawed," I muttered in agony.

"I don't mind any of them," he resolutely replied.

"Victor," I finally pushed his hands off me and broke out the hug. I turned to him. "I forbid you from touching me," I harshly said.

He looked depressed. He didn't reply for a while. Finally, he turned his head away from me and brought his hands behind him. "Forgive my impudence," he said with reddened eyes. When I saw those eyes, my heart twisted.

"I will not touch you... without your consent," he said. "Still, you can't chase me away, your highness. Even though you don't like it, I won't leave," he spoke with resolution. "You're in grave danger and I'll be here protecting you," he continued.

I understood he was referring to James and his people. Victor was not aware of the real enemies. Still, I sensed my heart growing heavy and aching because of those words.

No matter what he said, my mind had been clearly repeating... 'He shouldn't be dying on my behalf.'

After a long silence, I looked at him determined.

"Victor," I called his name in a low voice. He turned to me without delay and awaited my next words.

"I'm not the real princess," I said.

I had no idea what got into me but I spewed the truth just like that. At that moment, it appeared to be the best solution to make him leave Astrana. He wouldn't want to stay with me if he knew everything.

Victor didn't reply. He just appeared extremely confused.

"I'm from another world." He was still speechless.

"It might be hard for you to believe but this is a book universe that I used to love. I read all your stories many times. Then one day, I died with this book in my hand and got transmigrated here."

"I don't like it when you lie," he stepped forward. This time, he looked intimidating and troubled. He was trying his best to quench his anger. "Don't do this," he indistinctly whispered.

"How do you think I know everything about you?" He paused.

"I know about your country better than the king of Astrana. Even the king of Dagresh. Don't you think so?" I asked as I stepped forward.

This time he looked a little perplexed.

"Have you ever wondered how did I manage to know everything without really having any spies?" I stepped even closer.

"I know about you being allergic to flowers. I know the secret code word of Dagresh spies. I even know how you got that scar," he seemed a bit startled.

"You were wounded when your drunken uncle pushed you downstairs. You were just ten back then," I paused. "That night you cried thinking about your mother," though my words were harsh, I told him everything without any wavering.

This time Victor was not looking at me in confusion anymore. It was more like awe. I wanted to hug him and console him for whatever agony he had been through in his life. But I shouldn't.

"I know everything. Every ounce of your life," I said. Though it was an overstatement, I had to use the words to make him realize the depth of all these. "I even know how you despise your king for spying on Astrana."

"How?" he muttered.

"It's all because this is a book. And I know all of your fates beforehand," I told him as I looked him into his eyes. "So, I had been trying to alter it in the way I wanted."

'This should be enough. Should be enough to make him leave me. Should be enough to make him... hate me,' I thought as I looked deep into his eyes expecting evidence of hatred.

He looked down and stepped back instinctively. I understood his state of mind. Nobody would want to be a part of someone else's selfish plan. Without words, I continued to look at him.

"Even Edward is the same. He is not the real crown prince," I told him. He needs to know so he would be careful.

Victor creased his brows. He leaned against the wall of my bedroom with a sigh. He was quiet for a few minutes. At last, he seemed collected.

"I need some time," he told then hurried to the balcony.

I sat on the bed and awaited his return like an insane woman. I believed he will return to forbid his goodbye. I waited till the next morning, without moving an inch. But he never came back.

At the time when the sun rose in the east, I felt lightheaded. "It's over. Isn't it?" I said as I clutched the gown covering where my heart was. I never thought it would hurt this much but my heart and head ached like I'm going to die that day. Within seconds, I fainted on the bed.