1 Chapter 1: You're Kidding Me

It's dark...

Am I dead?

"To be totally fair this is what I expected when I died," Oliver muttered as he looked around, or at least he thinks he did.

Just floating around in an empty void with nothing around was my go-to picture when I thought of what would happen to me after death.

Not that I necessarily didn't believe in a god but I'm the kind of guy who needs proof ya know?

Anyway, I am still rather curious about what is happening or rather the lack thereof.

While I did imagine being in a void, I kiiiiiinda didn't account for the fact that I would be the one just sitting here with nothing to do, and lemme tell you, I, AM, BORED.

I don't exactly know how much time has passed whether it's only been a few seconds or maybe a few years because guess what, I have LITERALLY nothing to reference here.

I take that back, I am able to reference the fact that I was able to sort out my thoughts and become bored so at least I know that some time has passed, but that doesn't change the fact that I'm still bored.

I try to pout but the moment I open my mouth to inhale (I think?), I am immediately assaulted by a horrible taste on my tongue.

"ACK, Huuuuuuuuuuuueghhh" I try to gag whatever I just inhaled but to no avail.

I seem to have accidentally consumed a steaming pile of wandering horse shit that just so happened to fly in my mouth when I opened it, or at least that's what it tastes like.

Actually, now that I think about it...

Assuming that I did die and that I really am in whatever afterlife, purgatory, void-like dimension place this is which for some reason tastes like shit, that leads me to one question (Aside from why this place taste's god awful)...

WHAT THE HELL KILLED ME?!?

I wouldn't say that I was necessarily motivated in life but I certainly wasn't suicidal!

I'm just a little bit lost, ya know?

It was my college years and I was just tired from all the classes and stress that was accumulating throughout the semesters so I'm not necessarily mad that I died.

What I am mad about, however... That I don't know what killed me! Was it a person? Did I get assassinated? Wait what? No! I was a college student, who the hell would want me dead?!

Wait, maybe my parents racked up some insane debt and this was a warning?

No... that can't be right either.

We weren't exactly well off, but I at least know that we weren't really hard-pressed for money.

There shouldn't have been any major debts other than my student loans, but who the hell would kill the student in order to get the parent to pay the loans? It doesn't make any sense!

Wait why am I still thinking that I was assassinated?

It was the 21st century for Pete's sake! So, ya know, murder is kind of hard to get away with considering all the technology and cases that they've seen and experienced in the past already?

In that case, what killed me?

I'd like to think that I eliminated an option here but realistically speaking? No, I probably didn't.

Most people like to think that their death will be through assassination or murder because they think that they're some protagonist of a movie or book or something but this is reality, not fiction.

So if I wanna think really not fictionally then I would guess I died due to either a health problem or an accident.

I don't think I died due to health reasons because while I wasn't exactly active, I was still in shape!

I wasn't a slacker considering how much money I was paying to go to that college, or rather how much money my parents were spending.

Maybe it really was a massive debt and I got assassinated as a warning... NO, STOP IT, WE'VE BEEN OVER THIS. I. WAS. NOT. ASSASSINATED.

So if it wasn't an assassination, and it wasn't due to health problems... then... it was an accident?

DAMMIT, I DIED BECAUSE OF AN ACCIDENT?!?

You're kidding me. Wait, but what kind of accident was it?

Was it some high-speed cop chase that ran into me while I was crossing a street? Or was I just an accidental casualty of a drive-by? Or, worst of all... Did I fall down some stairs?

Yep, now that I think about it that totally seems like me.

Spending 17 years of my life just to die falling down stairs on my way from classes.

At least I hope it was from classes, I don't even wanna think about it if it was during a trip to the bathroom. I don't wanna be the next Elvis, no offense.

So I died in an accident. I don't know what kind but I can hope it wasn't an embarrassing one and am now floating in an eternal void with no one, and nothing else around.

Shit! I need something to happen soon otherwise I think I may go crazy.

As a matter of fact, I think I may be going crazy already.

I know that people can go insane if they go in solitary confinement for long enough but surely it hasn't been that long right?

While I'm not going to claim to be the most "macho" man around I certainly thought that I would at least put up a little bit of resistance to losing my mind...

But the bigger reason why I think I'm going crazy is that I think I can feel something on my leg, no... my arm, I think?

Did I get whatever went in my mouth on my arms, too?! I can still taste it in my mouth but I can also kind of... taste it? On my arms, I guess?

Maybe my mind is still a little bit too groggy and my senses are all still just confused. Honestly, I'm not entirely sure what exactly I'm feeling or where I'm feeling it.

I just know that I can feel something, or rather that at least one of my senses is actually working giving me some form of simulation to know that something is actually happening around me.

Wait is it actually dark around me? Or can I not just see?

DAMMIT! I wish I knew what was going on, I hate being clueless!

Oh, wait I think I feel a little something again.

Yeah, yeah!

I can definitely feel something on my arm... leg... thingy. Can I move it?

I can't really feel whatever this is very well, but at the current moment, this is the most entertaining toy I've ever found in my life.

I feel like that sewer rat that found a limited edition piece of Ratatouille cheese that was thrown down the drain after a 5-year-old kid finally got bored of the movie.

Point is, I can't do anything else at the moment can I?

Hey, I think whatever I'm touching is finally starting to move!

I can't quite grab it or rather I can't even feel my fingers nor the boundary of whatever I'm touching but I can at least push on it!

C'mon just a little bit more..! I

hear a sudden squishing sound that envelops my entire being as my arm leg managed to push a little farther into this thing and suddenly I hear an indeterminable voice in my head...

<Congratulations!>

<You've begun the initialization of the Origin System!>

You've got to seriously be kidding me...