1 Aburame Malaria
Mosquitoes.
Everywhere.
Hundreds, thousands, hundreds of thousands.
What happens when you trip in a swamp in the late evening during peak summer season? You get knocked out by hitting your head on a rock on the side, of course.
And what happens when you wake up? You find yourself absolutely covered in uncountable amounts of mosquitoes. The first reaction one might have is tremendous fear. The second one would be incomprehensible itchiness, so much so you'd rather skin yourself than keep wearing your birthday suit.
In an attempt to stifle said itchiness, you'd probably get a heart attack from the amounts of itchy-fluids flowing in your system. That, and the most probable five different kinds of malaria, tens of parasites and other evil a plague of mosquitoes tend to carry.
So, after attempting to itch yourself, you die. After you die? There's no God as one might expect. Instead you'll follow a karmic thread of cause and effect. You died of lightning? One Piece lightning fruit reincarnation for you, woohoo!
And that's how, and why, our protagonist became the greatest failure of the Aburame clan in the shinobi world - Aburame Malaria.
Death by mosquito is too rare a fate. So much so that even for the karma of the universe to offer you a proper isekai holiday will feel like karmic punishment instead. If you happened to die by a parasite or disease, things would be simple - plenty of powers and places to choose from.
But here you are, a Aburame clansman unable to even feed the lowliest chakrabug so the only insect to match your inability would be the mundane mosquito. Ever felt the itch of a mosquito bite under your skin? Well, that'll be your daily life from now on!
Stride on, young Aburame - the world of Shinobi's will surely have a place for you!
—
"I HATE THIS, I WANT TO DIE!", a shout was heard echoing through the outskirts of Konoha from the Aburame clan chambers. "I REFUSE TO ACCEPT MY FATE! You damn brat over there. Yes! You! Guide me to the Hokage rock - I'm going to commit suicide by hanging on the Third's boulder beard!"
"Malaria-kun, please calm down - all is not lost.." A calm voice attempted to soothe the young five year old Malaria. "You're still too young to have cultivated enough chakra for the Kikaichū to nest within you, which is very strange within the family. Still, as you grow older and your chakra capacity increases you too will become a splendid ninja."
[A/N: Kikaichū; literally meaning: Parasitic Destruction Insects]
"I understand that I'm an untalented waste, but why, please tell me WHY(!?) is my placeholder insect the mosquito?" Malaria's eyes almost broke through the trademarked Aburame glasses over his eyes. "Do you understand that the feed of a mosquito is blood? What happens when a mosquito feeds? IT ITCHES! Oh, dear elder, have you ever felt a few hundred mosquito bites under your skin? I'M GOING INSANE AS WE SPEAK!!" he screeched.
Hearing a few silent chuckles from the others in the room, Malaria couldn't take it anymore and dashed outside, clawing and scratching every part of his body. After barely a hundred meters he slowed down and kept on walking towards the village. Still scratching himself all over, of course. Keeping his head down and sulking, he knocked into a Uchiha police ninja by a coincidental mistake.
"Damn kid, do you want to die? I'll lock you up for disturbing the peace." The uchiha was fuming, as they do. Looking down at the child acting like a flea ridden monkey he noticed the glasses and attire of Malaria. "Oh, a bug child. Scram off then, or I'll squash you like the bug you are." the policeman sneered.
"Yes, please kill me. While you're at it, twist the kunai to ScRaTcH tHiS iTcH fOr ME!!" Malaria replied in an increasingly demented tone of voice. "I wAnT tO DiE, and if you're not quick enough I'll jump from the Hokage Rock with a glider, splattering myself on the pavement inside your Uchiha clan! Let's see if your family will ever get rid of the insect plagues that my folks will send over, stinkeye." Malaria grinned, he really couldn't wait to die to stop the constant itch.
The Uchiha paused for a second, not quite understanding what the 5 year old child just said. Then, he started raging as per the routine.
"Damn insect, how dare you disrespect the Uchiha clan and the Hokage Rock in a single sentence!? I'm detaining you and we'll see what the Aburame will do once they hear about this!" The Uchiha reached out his hand to grab Malaria by the shoulder to lead him away. As his hand touched Malaria, all he felt was a lot of squirming.
Before he could think further and realize he just squashed a few dozens of mosquitoes under the boys skin, Malaria started crying loudly on the street. "YoU KiLlEd My BuGs!" he wailed and threw a tantrum, attracting a lot of passersby on the streets of Konoha. A feeding mosquito only uses it's itchy liquid to keep blood uncoagulated. A squashed mosquito on the other hand will release all it has in its dying efforts.
"The Uchiha are at it again, not even the Aburame children get away from their wicked ways…" A suspiciously emotionless person said in a low voice within the crowd. The entire mob was looking in sympathy at the crawling and squirming Malaria on the ground. They thought he was devastated, but in reality he was simply trying to scratch the itch that suddenly exploded worse than ever.
"Yes, even going so far as killing the childs pets in broad daylight. They are a menace." another equally emotionless voice answered. Slowly but surely the incognito Root members started spreading the news all over Konoha. Hide your pets, hide your kids - or the Uchiha will take them and break them.
As the policeman stared at Malaria crawling like a worm on the ground with a blank look and heard the onlookers soft discussions, he almost awakened his Sharingan from two tomoe straight to the third. 'What the f*ck is this!?' he thought to himself. 'I barely even touched the brat!'
"Everyone, this must be a mistake. I've thrown our Uchiha clans legendary fire ninjutsu at a swarm of Aburame chakrabugs before with no result to show for it! The brat is overreacting just to slander…", before he could finish explaining himself, he heard Malaria whisper something on the ground.
"What's red, black and rotates?" looking down at the kid in confusion, Malaria continued; "Your former clan leader, spinning in his grave.." The Uchiha policeman instantly awakened his third tomoe, looking like he's completing handseals with his dancing eyebrows for the classic 'Katon: Fireball no Jutsu'.
Without another word, Malaria got grabbed by the ankles and moved away by the Body Flicker Technique straight towards the Konoha Police Department. Feeling the world spin, he heard the crowd gasp in unison as the suspiciously loud, yet soft, emotionless voice kept drumming things up. "The child even soiled himself in fear. The Uchiha can't be left doing things however they want.."
As they say, having mud on the back of ones pants - even if it's not shit, people would naturally assume it to be. The Uchiha looked back to inspect and he just saw the little devil covered in mud. The onlooking civilians on the other hand couldn't tell the difference since the kid was being flailed around at high speeds by the policeman.
Cursing under his breath, in just a few moments they arrived at the policestation. Fuming with slight chakra flames coming out of his head, the Uchiha stomped his way inside and threw Malaria into a holding cell. It was clearly just for show as the cell had a soft bed, a few books and some refreshments by the nightstand. If the bars weren't there, you'd mistake it for a motel room.
"Little devil, stay here until we contact the Aburame clan to bail you out." Before Malaria could respond the policeman flickered away. 'I'm pretty sure he's going to throw some fireballs at some training dummies with my face on it..' Malaria thought to himself.
'Well, now that I've practically disdained all of the Uchiha clan in one move, Danzo should pick me up. I can't wait for him to KiLl mY fEeLiNgS sO I cAn GeT sOmE rEsPiTe.' Actually arriving in the shinobi world after death was a pleasant surprise, until he realized the previous owner of this body literally hanged himself to get rid of the itch. He couldn't blame him and almost re-used the very same rope after a mere 5 minutes of arriving in this world.
But before he got the chance, some bug in a corner of the clan noticed his predecessors chakra signature disappearing so an elder was instantly called to the scene. As Malaria was fiddling with the noose and looking for something to hang it on, the elder slapped it out of his hand and started smashing a full-course of 'will of fire'-treatment into his head.
After the will of fire, it was time for a lesson on the history of Konoha. "Hashirama Senju ended the warring states period and founded the village together with all the major clans.." he continued on and on, he simply wouldn't let him tie the hangman's knot in peace. The elder noticed how Malaria wasn't absorbing an iota of his wisdom and dragged him to the hall, where his story finally began.
