webnovel

Prologue

*Beep* *beep* *beep*

It's really it, huh? I can feel it. After so long, trying to prevent the inevitable, I'm going to die. Hihi, to think I'm not even scared of the concept, is it because I've expected this to happen? Like a cornered animal that has no way to escape its predator.

Do I have any regrets in this life? Not really, when death looming over me my main aspiration was ignoring it as long as possible. Enjoy my incredibly limited life, with the few family and friends that stuck with me. Even if I had to hide my pain, fear, and despair, so they wouldn't be to affected. I still enjoyed there presence.

I breath in and out *cough* *cough* I cough into my hand feeling some liquid fall on it. Pulling back I see my blood on it "hehe" I couldn't help but chuckle. Concentrated breathing is supposed to be good for you but, it's a nightmare for me at least recently.

Hehe that's right. I'm one of those fools that are obsessed with the chi and cultivation. I couldn't help it as some one who was always unhealthy, I wanted to be super healthy. So I ended up wasting my eidetic memory on a library's worth of cultivation books.

Well waste is a bit harsh, since I don't use it for anything but, manga and the occasional book. The Percy Jackson series is a personal favorite of mine. Then there's Naruto that I'm scarily obsessed with in a weird way. In simple terms I never watched the anime or read the manga. No, I buried myself in fan fiction novels.

I know it's weird not reading the main material, but I'm dying so I can care less. I indulged in fan fictions like the Game of Shadows, The Return of The Flash, and my personal favorite Goddess of Ice, Reborn as Naruto's Twin Sister. The reason this is one of my top 10 is simply because it focus heavily on jokes that make me genuinely laugh. Skipping the nitty gritty and getting right down into the litty. Hehe I like B.

"Hehehe …." I look around my room and begin to tear up and I don't know why. I accepted my death, I cherished the time I had left either with family or…

Alone.

That's right I'm dying alone with no one to hold me when I pass all because of my stupidity. I told them to only spend time and visit on Sundays of course they don't do it all the time but, I don't expect any surprise visits today.

An…

And

I wanted to see them one last time, even if the last thing I saw was there sad and grieving faces trying to deny my death.

Even if there beautiful eyes were blurred with tears, even if there unique faces were wrinkled with frowns, even if there perfect frames shook with held back or released sobs. I would have loved to see their perfections and imperfections one last time.

Then it struck me like a lightning bolt, my purpose, my selfish desire, my reason to live. 'Though… it's to late… I can't fulfill it' tears begin to flow down my face freely, as I sob for the first time since I was six.

I wanted to see beauty of any type be it the imperfections of those I hold dear. The sick design of dangerous beast, the endless void of space, and my own. Most importantly I want to see the beauty of this cruel, unforgiving world.

My breaths begin to labor, my vision goes from blurred to shaded, and my body feels cold. I'm dying and I don't know if it is good or bad that I found my reason to live because now I don't want to die. No matter how much I accepted this inevitability.

I begin to use concentrated breathing in a desperate attempt to preserve my life. Even if I know it will only quicken it I still do it. I persevere through Intense burn and pain in my lungs to prolong my finite life.

Breath in, breath out… breath in, breath out…

My vision clears and a spark of undoubtedly false hope fills my heart. My instincts yearn for me to say something. I wanted to yell only to realize I don't need to. I wanted to scream to realize I don't want to. I wanted to leave a message even though I can't.

So I compromise, I compromise by leaving behind my dream to wander the ever flowing winds.

"No matter how cruel, ruthless, or fear inducing the world in my next life is. I will enjoy it, and see all it has to offer even if I have to slay those who call themself divine to do so"

Next chapter