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I woke up the next day around noon ... or rather the cry of a baby woke me up ... It was Bjorn, after a while Arne and Revna joined him ... they started a choir or something.

I got up and checked my offspring. Arne and Revn looked normal, they were just awakened by Bjorn's crying... and Bjorn probably had a full diaper or was hungry or both.

Hild was not getting up yet, it was only a few days after giving birth and she had to regain strength ... I called one of the slaves to change Bjorn's diaper, when she finished, I took him in my arms ...

- You woke me up, you little terrorist ... but I will remember it and I will have my revenge in the future ... and you won't expect it ... I'll throw a bucket of cold water on you when you are asleep ... this will be my version of Ice Bucket Challenge.

I gave baby Hild who immediately started feeding him ...

- Lord, has something happened that you keep looking at me? (Hild)

- Nothing ... I just envy him ... a few more weeks." (Ulf)

Now I still have to pacify Arne and Revna ... I went to their cribs, took them both in my arms and started singing to them. It might not be the most appropriate lullaby, but one of the few I knew, and my kids don't know modern English anyway.

"Hush little baby, don't say a word,

Papa's gonna buy you a mockingbird.

And if that mockingbird don't sing,

Papa's gonna buy you a diamond ring.

And if that diamond ring turns brass,

Papa's gonna buy you a looking glass.

And if that looking glass gets broke,

Papa's gonna buy you a winter cloak.

And if that winter cloak's too cold,

Papa's gonna buy you a pile of gold.

And if that gold was stolen, too,

Papa's gonna go to jail for you.

So hush little baby, don't say a word,

Papa's gonna kill for you

the whole damn world."

Unfortunately, one lullaby was not enough, but luckily Lagertha showed up and I was able to evacuate ... if you have to do something, and there is someone to frame to do it for you ... only a fool will not take advantage of the situation.

Little children are terribly demanding ... If I ever get reborn again, I think I'm adopting some 18-year-old Korean or a Japanese girl.

- Erik told me that you are moving out of the house for the winter, you couldn't tell me yourself? (Lagertha)

- It's true, I'll be on one of the islands. I'm going to try out some ideas for siege machines, and doing it in Kattegat can be too dangerous ... but I won't be far, just a few miles from home... You were busy all the time and I didn't want to bother you with the details. (Ulf)

- Oh, and the little child has nothing to do with it? (Lagerhta)

- Of course not, ask Erik. I told him to prepare the island for my stay before we left for England ... you can always visit me with the kids ... once every two or three weeks ... rather three. (Ulf)

- I don't believe you anyway, but never mind. Helga came to us this morning and she wanted to apologize to you ... I didn't really understand her. (Lagertha)

- Nothing like that, during the party I went to the workshop and Helga was there ... naked ...

- Ulf !!! (Lagertha)

- ...together with Floki and Torstein, they had sex. She just apologized for the mess they made in the workshop ... You don't have to worry, I don't like her. (Ulf)

Lagertha was not angry at my move, but rather at the fact that I had spent a few months in England, and now I was going to leave her for another few months ... We both went downstairs to the kitchen to eat and then I started packing my tools.

The first days of solitude were spent on planning the next work and preparing the materials ... although I wanted to build prototypes of the catapult and a large ballista, I also wanted to build a few other things.

The first thing I did was to improve the ram and the ability to disassemble and assemble it at any time. Parts can always be transported by ship and put on site just before the attack ... The first time we built a battering ram during the attacks on settlements in the Frankish Empire, it took a few days. Unfortunately, there is not always that much time during a siege. The task itself was not difficult and took me less than two weeks. It took me three hours to assemble the battering ram, only two to disassemble it, and I did everything myself.

I also built portable wooden walls, which ensured a safer approach to the walls of the enemy city, a larger ballista, although here I ran into the same problem as in the case of smaller ballistas, animal tendons quickly lost their flexibility ... but I was not only working, Lagertha visited me every few days , alone or with children ...

- What is this? (Lagertha)

- These are parts for a siege machine called trebuchets, I haven't finished it yet ... what you see is the basket, it will counterbalance the projectile that is supposed to be on the other side of the arm. (Ulf)

Lagertha looked surprised, she didn't seem to really understand how it worked.

- This basket will be loaded with stones or sand and will weigh nearly 10,000 pounds, allowing you to launch a load of 80 kg at a distance of 200 meters. The arm with the weight lowers and the force fires the projectile. (Ulf)

- But what do you need such a machine? (Lagertha)

- Kattegat has a stone wall, but it is not large. Cities like Paris or Constantinople have much bigger and stronger walls ... to get to the city you will need a key to the gate ... and this is my key. (Ulf)

I was glad she didn't ask any more questions, explaining to my wife that the earth was round, the earth's gravity and magnetic field ... I didn't have that much patience.

- Are you going to attack these cities? (Lagertha)

- Of course, but in the distant future, I need a much larger army ... but when everything is ready, I promise that I will take you to see Hagia Sophia. (Ulf)

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