1 Friend

We go to the same school sense we were in kindergarten,I always tried to get close to her though she would always go the other way and ignore me . She was bisexual like me but she wasn't afraid to show it unlike me I... well got bullied most of the time but she would always say to me "You want to play " which I would always get excited in the inside but say "yes" in a calm way cause I don't like to be show it . My Mom,Dad and sisters don't know that I'm bisexual so I never talk about her unless I talked about my other friend so I never gave out hits,It's been 5 years sense I started to like her but 2 years ago a girl named "bitch" that's her name for now, came to my school and started to take my crush away from me which got me sad but like what can I say if I reacted jealous then she would have known so I just tried hear the word "tried" to be calm about it but over the years she always sat next to her talked to her and like even moved my stuff to sit next to her which my reaction was like "What the fuck, I knew her first"but I almost said that out loud. Lots of people saw My crush like a amazing,perfect girl but it got worse cause Angie was even worse like way worse so like almost every night I said to my self that Tatyanna is gonna like u, you are gonna sit next to her tomorrow. My head felt like I was a sad volcano about to burst of tears, I tried to forget her but I would always think of her like I couldn't live without her but in my mind it always showed her with different people and forgetting all about me which just made me one day almost kill my self cause I thought "why... why does she always make me jealous like she already knew that I liked her " and I got caught to by my mom and she said to me " Kay what's going on, come out we can talk " and I said " I'm fine so please leave me alone " but she saw under the bathroom door that my feet weren't touching the ground so she yelled out " Kay don't hurt yourself" but I almost did but then realized that if I did hurt my self I won't ever see her face so I stoped and just cried and sobbed then 4 minutes later I open the door and I see my mom almost about to cry, My Dad then ends up asking me why I did that and I lied and said "Cause Leilar has a boyfriend who is Mexican " so he said " just cause your sister has a Mexican boyfriend doesn't mean he is bad" so I calmed down and went to sleep while sobbing in my pillow wondering "will she ever like me"?