1 chapter 1

( let me just start off with a note. I will not be using real names of people and places for privacy reasons. this story will be base off my romance with my boyfriend who for privacy will be going by his nickname only ..Jay. )

hello there~ My name is Kara and this is my story. But before I get into finding my love let me give you some background info on me so you can get into my head so to speak

I was always the type of girl who had her head in the clouds or well in books, games, or shows. I used to well break away from reality and fantasize how my life would be in books or tv shows. My parents divorced when I was young my mother some years later would give me a sister , my father never having any more children after me.

I lived with my mother and sister till I was 15 when I moved in with my father. I grew up not very  girly I was a tomboy so to speak , hell me and my cousin used to pull the heads off my barbie dolls and give outside to play in the dirt and find bugs. When I was about 17 my mother took my sister and moved far away, her doing that kinda gave me some emotional scars. Then my father started to mentality abuse me. So for me I never thought I'd find anyone to love me.

When I hit 20 is when I decided maybe I can finally branch out and find someone because before finding someone never crossed my mind. I still lived with my father not that I wanted to do so, evertime I tried to move out I suddenly would have to pay him for something then it started to be I had to pay rent and that was basically my whole paycheck every week! 

I'm sure by now everyone should get the fact my father was trying to keep me under his thumb and you would be right. Hell the things he would call me no good father would ever call his daughter that. 

Now we look at me at age 24. Working at a local super market for almost 3 years at that point my bestfriend for 13 years had become my ex bestfriend and the new friend I had well she was kinda shitty as well. so I really had no one in my life .

I had come to dye my hair different colors to try and be different. One day I was standing by the time clock ready to punch in when a new employee came around and started talking to me. Now I never really paid much attention to other employees that came and went in other departments besides mine so this employee talking to me startled me a bit, it didn't help either that I really didn't even pay him no mind till then didn't even say hi to him before. He said hey my birthday is in a few weeks could you dye your hair blue it's my favorite color. I said sure why not blue is my favorite color as well. So I did and when I had gone in on my day off to show him, he was happy and ended up giving me his number. I didn't think anything of it other then he must want to be friends. Let me tell you I had no idea what this slightly older man wanted. I still had no confidence in myself but I knew there was no way this attractive black man would want me. Now I dont care about age difference or hell even race difference but for me I always seemed to attract only the attention of creepy white boys ( i am white myself). Like you know those type of creepy white dudes who you dont know if they stalk woman to do something to them or just be stalkers, ya that's the type i always seems to be around. Anyway I didn't think I'd be worth more then a friend to this guy but we started texting anyway. I'll never forget that meeting with Jay.