13 Thinking about it

Henry's POV

When Jenna came into my office to bring me the soup, she caught me working at the prototype strategy matrix. As focused as I was on the task at hand, I couldn't help but notice her beautiful smile as she came to my desk. I thought about the discussion we had in the kitchen and the fact that I was an inconsiderate asshole. I honestly didn't know how to be otherwise. My father thought me about the importance of feelings and how you can harness them in order to accomplish your goals. He said love has no place in business and perseverance must be the fuel of your desire to succeed. For 32 years, that was all I knew and did, until I met her. For some reason, she awakened feelings that made me irrational, she made me unable to suppress my emotions, somehow vulnerable to her simple presence or a glance at another man. I was afraid that this might destroy everything my father built and I couldn't allow that. I was looking for a reason to remove her from my thoughts, to think she was just another meaningless woman I dated.

When I asked Jenna about her past, she reluctantly told me about her time spent at the orphanage alongside her brother and I blew everything up with my bad sense of humor. Our conversation was interrupted by a phone call from William. I saw her exiting my office visibly upset from our discussion.

"William, how are you?" I inquired trying to seem excited.

"My boy, I am calling to see if you are available for dinner tonight. Christine is eager to see you and I am dying to hear your decision regarding our deal." he made a pause to hear my answer. I grunted knowing that even if my mother pushed me into a loveless marriage and I was aware it was for the sake of the company, I couldn't go on with it. Something was holding me back, or better said, someone. Jenna's face popped into my head and I immediately shook it off, trying to eliminate her image from my mind. Suddenly, a powerful sneeze got out and my nose became runny again.

"Henry, are you ill by any chance?" he asked apparently worried about my condition.

"Is it that obvious?" I asked sneeringly.

"Well, is either this or you're allergic to something." he stated.

"I wished it would be an allergy, unfortunately this isn't the case. I have a flu since this morning so it would take some time for me to recover."

"I see...give me a call once you get better. We still have business to discuss and I'm looking forward to investing in your idea. I think it has great potential." he added.

"Ok, I will. Don't worry about it! I'll feel better in no time." I lied sensing a light migraine settling slowly, but not from the cold but rather from the thought of our future meeting and the question I was still hesitant to answer. I could have actually done it over the phone, accept Christine's hand in marriage and get our lawyers to discuss the rest of the details for the so called "collaboration". My hesitation frustrated me and I couldn't understand why.

"That's great to hear! Let me know when you are ready to meet."

"I will. Have a great day!"

"Same to you, Henry!"

Few moments later after my conversation with William, Mark barged in a little startled, face dropping once his eyes landed on my pale face.

"Damn, man you look like an old shit which stayed in the sun too much!" he said entertained, keeping his distance.

"Don't you have anything better to do than coming to my office and patronizing me?"

"Man, in fact I am. I think I just got married but I have no idea with whom." he said effortlessly.

"What do you mean?" I frowned, thinking that there are people out there with bigger problems than mine. Let's take as an example the moron facing me.

"Well, after I left your party, I went to Las Vegas to have a little fun with those girls I came with at your party."

"Ok..."

"The problem is that I was so fucked up and I can't remember what happened after I got here.�� He shrugged moving his eyes in different corners of the room, trying to remember. After a short pause, he asked:" What actually happened at the party? I can remember small glimpses of it."

"Man, you're a fucking idiot!" I raged at him, annoyed by his stupidity that was not going off the roof.

"Give me some fucking credit, man. I'm actually trying to retrace my steps. I just found out I might I have a wife somewhere..." he crossed his arms on his chest and I sensed fear in his words. The mother fucker didn't know what he just got into.

"Well, let me think" I hummed and then added "...you came high and drunk at my party with four women which you ditched after 5 minutes and went around hitting on other men's wives, you drank almost 4 bottles of champagne, had a problem with the orchestra I hired and I have no idea what other fucked up shit you did because I was too busy talking with the investors. For all I know, you might have a bun in on oven, there somewhere" and saying that, I raised my hand pointing to the window." ... Anyway...I found an investor, a very reliable one..."

"Who?"

"William Dunphy!" His face dropped at the hearing of the name.

"Wait what?" he pouted, still unable to believe the name that came out of my mouth.

"Yes, and guess what he wants in return." I asked ironically and his eyes went wide open.

"High return rates?"

"A lifetime return rate." I followed and he chuckled.

"That sick bastard." he shook his head and I could feel that, for a brief moment we shared the same problem: marriage. He scratched his head nervously and, as if out of the blue he had a revelation, he ran towards me and hugged me excited.

"Congrats man! Damn, Christine is smoking hot! I can't wait for your babies to call me 'uncle Mark'"

"Don't be a bitch!" I said bothered by his flower-power attitude.

"You are a bitch! Better yet, you are THE bitch!" he shoved the knife even harder into the wound and I couldn't help but snap. I wrapped my arm around his neck in a tight grip, forcing his torso to lower it's level, his head being now below my upper body and I applied some chestnuts in his head to teach him a lesson.

"Who's my little bitch?" I asked entertained by his struggle. Even though I was not feeling well, felt my throat clenching and little droplets of sweat appearing on my forehead, I tried to ignore it and focus on our "friendship session". As he sensed my weak defense, he punched me in the stomach and I shrieked from the pain, trying to focus my energy on recovering quickly so that I can apply him the same "treatment". Suddenly, I heard someone clearing her throat. I raised my head petrified, knowing exactly who it was. She looked so pure and beautiful standing in the doorframe, puzzled from surprising two idiots in a warfare for no apparent reason. Her hair was raised in a bun, and although I preferred it loose because she resembled a wild sylph that couldn't be tamed, triggering inside me a desire to make her mine, now I could observe her delicate neck and little round face giving her the appearance of a child, tilted innocently on the side. Her big brown eyes had an amused flicker, but her face remained somber.

We both stood straight, trying to mask our shame form her, meanwhile I picked up my robe while Mark tried to justify our foolish behavior.

"I don't want to know the details!" she said briefly and I let out a sigh of relief since she didn't let the bozo finish. That would have been worse. I couldn't look into her eyes and I couldn't catch her last words properly beside the fact that she will be gone for some time as I was too ashamed by what she just witnessed. I approved, trying to make her leave the room as soon as possible. As soon as she was out the door, I heard Mark saying:

"Does your Jenna have someone in particular she goes to?" he asked raising the corner of his mouth while looking out the window.

"I don't know and I don't care." I said to him bitterly. He made me a sign with the index finger to come and have a look while he kept his eyes glued to something. When I got next to him and glanced out the window, I saw Jenna hugging a man that I could instantly recognize as Johnson.

"What is he doing here? Where is he taking her?" I thought to myself, rage pilling up inside me as I watched them both disappearing quickly from my sight.

"Man, are you ok?" Mark asked, watching me scowling and struggling with my inner thoughts. He stared at me confused as I went back into my chair and leaned on it, looking up the sealing thoughtfully, thinking at Jenna's encounter with Johnson. Were they friends? Was this their first date together? Was Johnson doing this to spite me or because she really cared for her? In that moment I realized I would kill him if I knew he would hurt her in anyway. I frowned, trying to remove that thought out of my head.

"Henry, for fuck sake, say something!" Mark raised his tone at me, hitting with both hands on my desk, trying to make me snap out of it.

"I'm fine!" I muttered without flinching from his gesture.

"You don't look that way! I think this girl is doing a number on you..." he stated.

"No woman can do that, especially not a thief!" I snapped and his mouth dropped. I realized I made a big mistake in that moment as he didn't know what really happened between the two of us.

"What do you mean 'thief'?" his eyes narrowed as he came closer to me. "What happened exactly between you two?" His curious nature made my blood boiling, and, at that point I was nearly considering punching him right in his clueless face.

"Get out Mark, I need some time for myself" I said calmly, trying to restrain my anger.

"Man, I'm not leaving until you explain to me what happened with this girl. You've been haywire since you meet her."

"GET THE FUCK OUT!" I spit out the words without thinking of what might happen. He was now looking at me shocked, trying to say something, but his mouth could not reproduce a single phrase. After a couple of seconds, he just nodded and went off the door, leaving me alone, with my thoughts.

I had no right to forbid her from seeing people, but at the same time I couldn't deny my feelings for her anymore. I got to the point where I had to make a choice and, although I regrated it, I dialed William's number.

"Hello my boy! I wasn't expecting your call so soon. Are you feeling better?" he asked.

"Hi William! No, I'm actually worse..." I said monotonously and then followed "I thought about your offer and there's no need for us to meet in person."

"I understand...So that means that you've already made up your mind?"

"Yes, I did! I'm going to marry Christine! I think it's the right choice. We'll discuss the arrangements after the contract is made. Tell your lawyer to give mine a call and prepare the papers...."

"That's great news!" he said excited. " Will do! I can't wait to tell Christine! She's dying to see you again!"

"Likewise!" I lied through my teeth. "Well, let me know when everything is ready!" I added.

"Ok, perfect! Have a good day, son!"

"Same to you, William!" I followed and hanged up.

Although I thought this was going to make me feel better, my heart was still hurting from the idea of an arranged marriage and most importantly, the woman I grew fond of in my own stupid way being in love or dating someone else, someone that was better than me, caring, understanding, respectful, someone like fucking Johnson. I went downstairs to make myself a cup of tea as my throat was aching even harder now. I began coughing from the scratchy sensation while my gestures resembled those of a robot with specific instructions.

Time went by quickly and I found myself switching the channels promptly, without even glancing at the content as I was wondering when did my mind became a mixture of feelings I could not shake. I was having a hard time understanding myself followed by images of Jenna and Phill kissing and feeling in love burned my heart which was beating faster now.

Suddenly, I see her coming in with a big smile on her angelic face but she looked worried once she saw me standing in front of the TV like a statue. That only made things worse for me.

"Hi! Are you ok?" she inquired but all I could do was acting like a jackass, holding her accountable for the date with Phill. Her fiery attitude made me wish to punish her, claim her as mine and ending this entire charade once and for all. I was aware I couldn't do that since it would have made things even harder for me, I couldn't back down now, not for her or anyone for that matter. For that, I was mad, not on her, I couldn't be, but on myself and my impossibility to show her how much she meant to me. I stormed upstairs as my mind was having a battle with my heart, trying to deceive it that I made the right call.