21 Wystan being Wystan

He sounded downbeat that I felt sorry for being one of the causes since I've met him. I assumed he would be someone who abuses his ability. Someone who does not view it as a curse but a gift. What with the status he holds.

"Why do you consider it a curse?" I asked, blatantly ignoring I might be pushing it a little too much.

Sure, I'm prejudiced. No doubt before this I believe I'm too good to do something so low. Yet here I am unknowingly stooping too low since the day I met him - been constantly assuming I'm better than him. Perhaps it was jealousy because he had something I don't. Who knows? But whatever it was, it's ugly.

"Many reasons."

"Like?"

I swear I did not expect his comeback. It's enough to shut me up for it hits right at home. Because as much as the truth hurts, the cut ran deeper for him than me.

His answer you ask? A curt response of "Judgemental people."

That's right! Being with him made me realised what a jerk I truly am. Either he brought out the real me and what I've been portraying myself turned out to be a big fat lie OR I'm not the right person for him. Clearly, it must have been hard for him to open up. Yet, I tried to tear him down at every opportunity.

Surprisingly, he grabbed my hand and gave it a little squeeze of assurance that I sooo don't deserve.

"Don't feel too bad."

Ouch! He knew I have been judgemental towards him.

"That's one of the many reasons why it's a curse. Those who knew would instantly be even more judgemental of me. I have anticipated this kind of attitude."

"You mean, you knew I would be mean to you? Are you sure it's not my true hidden self unlocked somehow?"

"Yeah."

"How sure are you?"

"Experience."

Despite him trying to be casual with his answer, I somehow could trace his tone swallowing a huge lump stuck at his throat. If what he said is true, everything does make sense. Especially with how he ignored all my rudeness. However, I still could not bring it in me to fully push the blame on his 'curse'. Surely I may have played a role in being a dickhead. If not eighty per cent, then maybe forty-five?

"What comes after that?"

"Don't know. Never made this far."

"What do you mean?"

"The opportunity to let them know never came. Normally they all had already walked away from my life."

Is that what I would be doing? Is that him dropping me hints?

"But you're stuck with me," his tone was lighter with a hint of jest as he whispered those words.

"Indeed I am!" I returned my response to match his. No point making his sad life even sadder when he was already trying to change the mood.

Right there and then, I made a mental note to check my behaviour from time to time. It truly must have been lonely for him. Goodness knows how his curse would try to manipulate me into isolating him. The least I could do is be there for him and mend a little of his damaged heart.

Upon arrival home, Wystan proceeded to go to his room as usual. That's what I have been doing too. But that evening I wanted to have some heart-to-heart conversation. I wanted to get to know him better. One that would make me see his point of view of the world so I would prepare myself from being judgemental again and again.

But... Would it feel forced? Would he prefer to be alone? Would it be obvious if I suddenly want to hang out with him?

Decisions, decisions!

Ah-ha!! I could ask about the First Dance as an excuse! I don't need to have the conversation now. I just need to bridge the gap that's already been built. Yes, that's it!

I quickly took a quick shower and knocked on his door. He opened the door with a very very very and I could not emphasise this even more but he looked VERY shocked. His eyes widened so much that his priceless emerald orbs might be falling off their sockets! His jaws gaped big enough as though coins would be pouring out like the coin machine.

I smiled meekly, belatedly realising a big drop of liquid fell on my shoulders and my back was soaking wet. Oh dear me, my hair!!! I forgot to check out myself in the mirror before I walked out of my door!! I must have looked like a swamp monster ready to terrorise the village! I'm sure it was noticeable that I put minimal effort to dry it properly.

Instantly my smile turned into an awkward grin, showing off my pearly whites and my pink gums. Unfortunately, my embarrassment did not end there. Because when I stared down, oh dear god! My buttons!! They weren't properly aligned!!! No wonder he looked at me like a mad man I should be! I'm to a point too afraid to even want to see how I looked!!

My eyes squinted for as long as I care. As though it would teleport me somewhere and erased this memory from both of us. His footsteps were slowly walking further away from me and I wonder if I should dash. But silly legs of mine went jelly. It stayed there until I heard his footsteps drawing near.

Aaaaaaahhh!!! I screamed internally, wondering whether it would cause bleeding in my ear and shifted the attention. However, with Wystan being Wystan who continued to be an unpredictable man, he made it to be a night I can never forget.

I guess it was a blessing in disguise.

Because Wystan being Wystan... He pulled me into his room that night. He placed soft furry cotton with a pleasant lavender smell on top of my head. He silently and gently massaged my head and dried my hair. It aroused warm fuzzy feelings that I had been trying so hard to fight.

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