29 8.2

Chapter Eight Part two

Gavin's words echoed in my head for a second. They completely scrambled any previous thoughts I'd had.

I shook my head, asking aloud, "What did he just call me?"

Gavin snappily turned, hissing as we walked away, "You heard me the first time."

I gasped, gawking at the back of his head.

Half choking on air, I coughed out a strangled, "What?"

"Stop playing stupid," he shouted, not bothering to face me.

I felt like I was having an out of body experience. The audacity he had, was just unbelievable.

I stomped after him in a rage. Within three steps, my brother's striped shirt was within my clasp. Unthinking, I reached out, digging my hand into his skin like a claw. I swung him around like a limp noodle.

Daring him to say it to my face, I fired at him, "What did you just call me? Turn around and look me in the eye Gavin."

Startled, my brother's brown eyes peered at me spooked.

For a moment I knew I appeared a little unhinged. I was trembling from the indignation his words had caused. The promise of raw, and untouched wrath was written all over my face. I wasn't smiling anymore, my face was hard, and my eyes unblinking. He'd pushed a button I wasn't aware that I had.

My words were lethal as I ordered him to say it again.

"Say it to my face," I demanded.

He sharply slung my arm off of him. Gavin back peddled quickly a few steps away from me. Hunched and cradling his arm, he paled.

Looking up confused, he breathed a jolted, "You just clawed me!"

Perplexed he glanced between me and his arm, as if he was too shocked to speak.

Indigent he cried, "Look!"

Striding forward, with his arm held towards me, he looked ready to cry.

"Look what you did to me!"

"Gavin," I snapped, my sharp tongue freezing him in his tracks, "How dare you call such a nasty name."

"You made me bleed," he wailed, like I was the one at fault.

Thinking twice about coming close, Gavin stood pointing at his arm. Sure enough, small red lines oozed against his tan skin.

Howling like a baby he sniveled, "You attacked me like some cat!"

Scathingly I put my hands on my hips, and narrowed my gaze, "You're lucky that's all I did, because you deserve a heck of a lot worse than that!"

Straightening his back, Gavin wiped his arm down his shirt. His crazy temper charged back into the forefront. It lit up his brown eyes, giving them a hint of madness. He closed the distance between us, putting himself practically chest to chest with me.

"Stop acting stupid," he warned, looking down the tip of his nose at me.

The problem was that while Gavin typically let his crazy out often, mine stayed under wraps.

That was of course until I was angry, and at that moment I was incredibly angry.

Lashing out, I went to slap him. Which wasn't something I would typically do, however when he called me a bitch a small screw in my brain came loose.

Quickly, he side stepped me, effectively avoiding the swipe.

"Stupid," I berated like a dragon, "Excuse me?"

He skipped back a few steps, putting space between us. I think he realized that he'd tripped a switch that he couldn't turn back off.

"You think I'm acting stupid," I blew up, "It's been you who's been acting like a moron this whole time! You've blown everything out of portion! You've been acting no better than a kid since this morning! Now you want to call me a bitch and I'm say I'm stupid? Are you kidding me?"

His dark eyes squeezed into two tiny squints and grated his teeth.

"Gavin," I finished, "you've really got a heck of a lot of growing up to do!"

"Seriously? I need to grow up," he questioned, "You are going to lecture me about acting like some kid and here you are…"

"Here I am doing what," I asked cutting him off, "spit it out honey. From where I'm standing, you've been pitching a huge temper tantrum this whole day, because you're not getting the answers that you want."

All I could do was look at him. Throwing up my arms, I indicated the large child in front of me.

"Children act out," I explained, "and that's all you do! You haven't given two cents about what's been coming out of your mouth this whole day! I'm the bitch? My gosh you gotta be kidding me!"

In front of Kyung, he'd left me a somewhat speechless and a stuttering mess. Now that I'd found my voice again, I couldn't stop myself.

"You seriously have no idea what I'm doing for you," I bellowed, the words pouring one after the other, "You're going to stand there and say I'm the bitch. All I'm doing is making sure you don't freakin get hurt or worse! Are you kidding me?"

My head felt ready to explode.

How was I a bitch? All I had ever done was look out for him. Every time, my bone head of a brother, got into trouble who was there? Me. Every time he needed a shoulder to cry on, or a hand to squeeze, I gave him mine. What more did he want from me? I gave my brother everything!

My heart squeeze so hard I felt like I was about to die.

Gripping my chest, I started to cry. My pain and anger were too much to handle.

"I've been working myself like a dog for you," I moaned, though my tears, "I've worry myself sick over you Gavin! Night and day! Wondering what trouble is he going to get into now? What sort of mess am I going to have to clean up now! I am so sick and tired of messes!"

Gavin sputtered, eyes wide, looking like a fish.

Sucking in a huge rush of air, he said, "Hold up! You're saying I'm the mess? You've been worrying yourself sick on my account?"

"YES," I screeched louder than a screech owl, "All you ever do, is find some new mess to get into! You need to grow up! It's freakin hard as hell living in this town. You can't let everything someone says turn into an all-out fight!"

Gavin's eye twitched. It was my first sign that his surprise was beginning to wane.

Almost on a whisper he questioned, "Pardon me?"

"All you ever do, is get into fights! You think using your fists solve everything," I lamented, "It doesn't. You shoot your mouth off about everything little thing that pisses you off, and you just can't do that! Sometimes you gotta keep your mouth shut, and just take it."

The absurdity of it all, felt like I was in some dream. I couldn't believe I was having this sort of argument with my brother.

Had it all come about because of Kyung? I wished that was the case. Deep down though, I doubted he was the soul reason.

"Oh, come on," Gavin bayed to the sky like a hound dog, "I'm sorry I don't take shit from people! I don't like people saying bull about my family! Excuse me for having some sort of back bone."

"That is not having a backbone. It's called being an uncontrollable hot head," I said sardonically, "People talk crap. All the time! That's what they do. You can't always take it personal."

"I guess I can't just bend over and just take it like you do."

"GAVIN," I exclaimed.

He shrugged. His reaction, and stance looked like that of some stranger. His gaze was unlike my brother. It was indifferent.

"I don't work myself like a dog, for people who could really give a dog's shit about me," he replied, his voice stinging, "What? You think you're some savior? You think that because you lick the boots of some of these people, it makes you better than me?"

I blinked. His words were like spit flying in my face. They were unexpected, disgusting, and uncalled for.

I never said I was better than him, not once.

He took everything I said, filtered it and scrambled up my words into another meaning.

Breathing in his name, I whispered it in awe. His lack of awareness was numbing.

"Gavin," I croaked, "I have never EVER said I was better than you. Why would you think…"

His face turned red, and his veins were popping out of his neck. He looked like his head was going to explode from all the pent-up rage he had.

I back stepped wondering if he was mad at me or something else entirely.

"BUT YOU ACT LIKE IT," he roared.

His words were like a slap to my face. My response was so quick that I didn't even know I had screamed back. The words and voice didn't feel like mine.

"WHEN," I challenged, "WHEN? Tell me a time that I made you feel like you weren't good enough? That I was better than you! Tell me!"

My face felt hot, my head hurt, and my fist were shaking from the urge to throttle him.

He had simply lost his ever-loving mind. He'd gone crazy or something. That had to be it.

Heaving in and out he was like some animal.

He breathed, "You! You…you are always going on and on about having to pay for everything, about how much something cost, or what I should be doing. How the hell do you think that makes me feel? As a man…"

Taken back, my voice fell.

"I never meant for you to feel like that! It's just that I'm tired," I pleaded with him, trying to get him to understand, "I am always going on and on about money, but it's because I feel alone! I feel like I'm the only one who's trying to keep this house afloat! I was just trying to…"

I was trying to keep everything together. I was trying help Nana.

She didn't have money. Papaw didn't leave her with hardly anything. She worked for so long taking care of us, but even the money my parents had left wasn't going to last us forever.

"What do you think I'm doing," Gavin stressed, "I work to or did you just forget that! I bring home money too!"

"But it's not enough. I can't count on it. You always end up losing half of it, from some stupid fight, or argument! On top of that you can never keep your job!"

He clamped his mouth shut. A tick started twitching in his jaw.

"Is that what this is about," I wondered, asking him carefully out loud.

Was he just trying me, or did he really feel like I was emasculating him? Was that what this was all about? Was he that worked up that he couldn't provide for us?

"Are you really upset about that," I asked, "Is that what this is all about? You're mad that I somehow make you feel like less of…a man?"

His jaw clenched tighter.

I looked at him, waiting for his answer. When he didn't give one and kept stewing, I asked again.

"Is that why I'm a bitch, because I'm paying off your debt?"

Gavin folded his arms.

His glaring at me did nothing to answer my questions.

"Fine," I said sharply, "I don't do any of this because I don't love you. I don't care if you think I'm the bad guy. I'm not letting them throw you in jail."

His face slowly twisted into an alarming smile as he let out the most disturbing laugh. It was creepy.

The reaction was not what I anticipated. It was frightening.

Manically he cackled at me, shaking his head.

"You are seriously clueless."

Confused I whispered, "Well, I must be because I have no freaking idea what you find so funny."

"This," he waved around, "You fucking have no idea what I'm pissed about."

Exasperated I begged him.

"How about you tell me, instead of playing guessing games."

"You keep everything to yourself like you are doing some Godly gift," he fired at me, "You get called out, and then turn it around back on me. Like I'm the bad guy?"

I corrected him, "You called me the bad guy. I called you childish."

"I didn't fucking ask you to do anything! Do you get it now," he asked laying it out, saying it slowly like I was stupid, "You did all of this on your own, and then expect ME to thank you for it? You don't think that's childish?"

Folding my arms, I simply stated, "Fine. You can finish paying for the damage you did at the Soggy Dog, yourself. You can also be responsible for paying all the bills on time and managing the household budget. Does that make you feel like a man now?"

Blinking Gavin flinched.

"What? That doesn't sound manly enough for you. Should I add in the stress of being broke? Is that better for you?"

"That was not my fault and you know it."

Shrugging I absently reminded him, "Well, the kids medical bills would beg to differ."

"You didn't have to pay for that Circe. He's twenty-seven! Let him pay for it himself! Seriously! This is what I'm talking about."

"His parents were threatening to sue! Willy wanted them to press charges! You would have gone to jail. What was I supposed to do," I asked, "The guy was in the hospital and you had a black eye, bloodied knuckles, and some bruises? That's not in the same ballpark as going to the hospital."

He exploded then. His words firing off as fast as mine had earlier.

"So, what! He hit me first! You chose to pay those bills without asking me," he rattled, "I was going to fight it! The jerk should pay for his own bills because it was his fault! Why the hell didn't you let me deal with it myself?"

"BECAUE YOU BROKE HIS RIBS GAVIN!"

Throwing out his arms he acted as if we were in some comedy sketch.

"See," he asked, "That right there is you stepping in where you don't belong!"

"How," I exclaimed, "I saved you from jail! Why in the world do you think I would let you settle something on your own, when you broke the guys ribs, and smashed up his friends? You broke a chair on his friends back!"

"I was trying to deescalate the situation," he offhandedly replied, trying to use a smarty word like it would help his case.

"Breaking a chair is not deescalating anything."

"I said I wasn't gonna pay. Then you had to come skipping in on your own, bending over backwards for the jerks," he said stressing the last word, "Make them pay us! He started it!"

I spun on my heel in a complete circle. The energy that was building, threatened to launch me at the doofus.

"Gavin," I forced past my lips, "his family was doing us a freakin favor! You should thank Nana because that guys Granny goes to Nana's church! Would you rather go to court? Jail? You're lucky that no one died or was crippled for life."

"Damn Circe! It wasn't my fault!"

"It doesn't matter," I wailed, "you still fought!"

If there was a wall, I would have been banging my head against it. Gavin just wasn't listening.

"You fought back," I explained further, "You sent the guy to the hospital, you broke his ribs. You are so lucky! Willy was pushing hard core for them to press charges, but they didn't! Why? Because I agreed that you would pay them back! Why don't you understand this?"

"They knew that jerk was at fault," Gavin claimed wagging his finger at me, "They ain't stupid. They knew he started it with me."

Obviously, my brother had jelly for brains. Every time I said something to him, it just bounced back at me.

"Circe it was three on one," he added quickly, "What the hell was I supposed to do?"

Frustrated, I yowled, "Call the cops, or Danny! I don't know. Anything! Just do something other than causing more trouble."

"What's the cops gonna do," Gavin challenged, "Nothing. What's Danny gonna do? Probably hide in the bathroom and then collect my body."

"Gavin you're being a bit dramatic."

"The dude's gonna do nothing," he laughed, "because he's too chicken it's gonna hurt his career. You and I both know that. He's a yellowbellied fool."

"Gavin," I drew out his name, shaking my head, "It's worse that the bar owner called the cops on you! Not the other guys!"

"Because the guy at the bar hates me!"

"It doesn't matter if the guy hates you or is in love with you! Just like it doesn't matter who started it."

"So, what was I supposed to do," he begged me, "NOT tell the girl she was going to die? I didn't think her freakin boyfriend would come looking for me."

"Of course, he would come looking for you! It's not your responsibility to tell someone how they are going to die!"

"BUT SHE WAS GOING TO DIE!"

"OF CANCER GAVIN! The girl died of cancer," I said, my voice cracking from all the arguing, "It was already too late!"

"How was I supposed to know," he complained, "How was I supposed to know that she'd tell her boyfriend and we'd just so happen to end up in the same bar at some point?"

"Because you live in the same town," I bellowed, "Try to understand where they are coming from."

"I'm sorry that I'm not as UNDERSTANDING as you are," he snidely remarked as he bowed to me, "I should have let myself get beaten."

"GAVIN," I asserted, "you aren't listening to me. People are looking for any and every opportunity to find something wrong with you. They want an excuse to fight you. Don't give them one. Stop getting into fights!"

One hand gripping his hip, and other pinching the bridge of his nose, his whole body trembled. He stood shaking from the effort it took to him, keep himself in check.

"I…am…not…the one…who starts it."

Trying to reach what was left of his rational side, I softened my voice, changing my tactics. I knew he could be sensible. I only needed to find my way in.

"Please," I implored, "Start thinking ahead. Get a job and…"

"I lost my job because of you," he heatedly shouted, reminding me by cutting me short,"Remember? I had a pretty decent job, but they tossed me out on my butt not because of what I did."

He shook his head, his body no longer vibrating from anger. It instead, it shook from his sardonic laughter.

"No, I didn't get kicked to the curb because of some punches. This time I got fired all because of you," he pointed at me, "found yourself in a mess and they used that to get me fired. I didn't do crap besides share DNA with yah."

I huffed folding my arms.

Really, it was Willy who had gotten him fired, but I wasn't going to bring that up. We were dancing on a tight rope Gavin and I. Splitting hairs wasn't going to help matters.

His laughter subsided, and his nasty attitude came back. Rolling his eyes away from me, he looked like he was chewing on rocks.

"You know," he bemoaned, "You're pretty ridiculous. It's like you got some bug stuck up your crack about everything. It's like nothing I ever do is good enough but everything you do is right."

"This isn't about me right now Gavin."

"It is," he spat, like a sting, "It's all about you. Always about you!"

I shook my head disappointed.

"How is it about me when I make everything about you guys? I say up at night worrying about how we are going to make our next bill. Do you," I asked honestly, "Do you think about that at all?"

I looked at him waiting to see if any change had happened, if I had reached him. I hadn't. The same angry eyes glared back at me, unemotional.

"I can't get a normal job Gavin. You know that. I can hardly function in a regular atmosphere because I hear voices all the time. I can't go anywhere without some spirit trying to find me, but you can. I'm doing my best," I reminded him, "I'm trying but are you?"

My comment must have rubbed him the wrong way because he bristled. My brother squirmed under the scrutiny.

I poked further at him, trying to push through whatever was blocking his commonsense.

"You don't see me hanging out with friends," I explained, "I'm always looking for my next job, worried about where the money is gonna come from. Do you ever wonder about we paid the electricity, or how we could pay the cable? No, you just turn on the TV every day expecting it to come on. You don't know how close we were to having it shut off."

I watched as he looked a little shaken. Clearly he hadn't a clue how strapped we were for cash.

"I didn't know that," he exclaimed, "and how could I? How could I know we're tight on money, when you don't say anything?"

My eyes flared.

"I shouldn't have to say anything! You know all the money I make is going towards cleaning up your crap. You can't be that unaware Gavin."

"So, you're saying that I'm the problem," he questioned, innocently.

I shrugged wondering exactly how innocent he could be.

His bushy brows shot sky high, as he folded his arms defensively."But that's not the case."

I narrowed my eyes, not liking what he was getting at.

"So then what is," I lethally questioned.

He tilted his chin up as if to challenge my way of thinking. Gavin's cavalier attitude was pushing me to the edge, I was on the verge of seeing red.

"You," he replied pointedly, "lost me my job."

"Oh, my lord," I breathed like I was going to spew fire, ��That was ONE time. ONE! What about the other jobs? You can't blame me for those"

His mouth opened and then closed. He didn't say anything, because he knew I was right.

His eyes said he was pissed. He fumed inside but was unable to formulate any words.

Sure, I had my own share of troubles, but these past few days were by far the worst problems I'd ever brought to the table. Gavin on the other hand, he was the one who just kept giving.

Finally, he spoke. His words harsh.

"If you kept your nose where it belonged then we wouldn't be having problems," he tossed at me, adding, "Instead of focusing on everyone else's problems, how about working on your own."

I reared back trying to swallow the nasty word that wanted to come out of my mouth.

"Wow," I flipped my wet hair to my other shoulder, snarling, "Right. So, looking out for you is someone else's problem? Trying to keep the electricity on is also somebody else's problem? Trying to save enough money so we have FOOD on the table… your saying that's also not my problem?"

"It is if they didn't ask you for it."

I exploded at him. My voice high and shrill with indignation.

"You expect me to just lay it all at Nana's feet? To let her figure that out on her own? She raised us! She deserves better. You're my brother," I hurled at him, "You should know that. Why is this so hard for you to understand? I help because I can, because it's my duty!"

"Duty," he repeated, his face screwing up in disbelief, "you think this is a duty?"

I exclaimed, "YES," throwing up my arms as if my brother had finally gotten it.

"Oh, my Lord," he spat, "you're ridiculous! It's not your duty! You don't ask for help! You don't tell anyone when you need help!"

"Well, I'm telling you now," I cried out.

Gavin yelled back at me, "Then stop talking to damn ghosts! That will help things. Stop galivanting around town when you know people hate you for it. Shut your damn mouth, and then everyone in town would leave us alone! Who do you think people have a problem with? It ain't just me."

I stumbled back, completely knocked off my horse. His words had just blown me over. I had no idea how the conversation got here.

"What?"

Gavin glared with his hands on his hips.

"People hate us because you keep talking to ghosts."

"Nana helps people," I protested, "How am I any different?"

"Ain't nobody asking you for help but dead people."

I pursed my lips, squeezing out, "What are you smoking? Of course, people ask me for help. It's not just spirits."

Gavin thundered at me, "What does it matter? Who cares about either of them! You don't even know those people. You think they appreciate you? No, they use you, ditch you, and then talk trash about you all over town."

I was about to lose my cool but Gavin's voice over road mine.

"Who cares about those damn people," he stressed again angry, "screw them! People you do know, are still dead. We don't know where their bodies are, or how they died! Are you even bothering to look for Mom or Dad? Hell no! All you do is just go around sniffing for some damn Joesmo."

My mouth shut and my heart felt like barbwires were squeezing around it.

"See," he smirked, pointing at me and wagging his finger, "You're not looking for them are you? You freakin gave up looking for your own damn parents. What a bitch."

"Gavin," I cried, real tears filling my eyes.

Maybe he was right.

Maybe I did give up.

"I have gone up there…and…they weren't…there."

He folded his arms looking away from me livid, as if he refused to take my answer.

"They weren't there," I said on a sob.

Guilt overwhelmed me, and I closed my eyes.

He was right. I had abandoned my own parents. I would never do that to another family. I would keep searching, until I found something. Why hadn't I kept looking for them? Why did I stop going to the house?

"You haven't really tried have you," he questioned bitterly.

"Yes," I howled, my eyes snapping open.

I wanted to deny the ugly feelings inside me, but it was hard.

"I have! I have," I mumbled over and over, "I just…they aren't there!"

"But have you gone inside the house," he bellowed, calling me out on my lie.

He knew I hadn't. Ever since that day I'd never been able to bring myself to set one foot inside our home. I didn't know why I was so scared. Just the thought of going inside had me feeling sick, like I was going to throw up.

Gripping my churning stomach, I covered my mouth.

I didn't know then why I felt so ill when confronted with entering our childhood home. I now knew. My mind had forgotten it, shoved it so deep within my subconscious that I couldn't remember. My body had though…the body never forgets trauma.

"Have you done everything you can to look for them," Gavin chastised me.

He walked up to me as I scuttled away.

"Can you really say that you have," he shouted, "You go out every day, and almost get yourself KILLED for some other girl, but our parents? You don't even try. It's like you just washed your hands clean of them and was like oh well. They were MURDERED Circe. You talk to damn ghosts but run away from our parents. Why? WHY? WHAT HAPPENED TO THEM?"

My body reacted violently. The thought of opening door to my parents' home, had my breakfast rushing back up.

Clamping a hand over my mouth, I practically collapsed, rushing to the nearest tree.

I retched, everything rushing up at once. My knees threatened to buckle as I gripped the tree for support.

"Where are their bodies Circe," Gavin questioned, once I had stopped.

Normally he couldn't handle things like this well. His stomach was notoriously week.

Drawing my panicked gaze, he held his arm over his nose so he couldn't smell anything. This time Gavin was relentless, he wasn't going to be fazed by anything.

"See," he spoke around his arm, "you can't even answer that. You sure as heck and tell me where everyone else's body is at. Why does me asking you about mom and dad get you so sick?"

My eyes dropped. I suddenly felt cold. The wet clothing against my skin began to chill me. I felt really sick.

Coming closer to me, Gavin sensed my week spot.

"You keep saying that you can't tell me this, or that, but why? You're protecting me, but from what? You see, I have no idea. So, yeah," he stated, his tennis shoes now in view, "to me it does seem like you're just being a bitch."

Looking up at him, I saw Gavin's anger ease out of him. It had left him in one audible exhale. Instead, he was left hallow inside, completely shelled out, and empty.

"That guy, Kyung or whatever, he showed you something," Gavin explained, "I have just as much of a right, as you do to know what that is."

My eyes widened. I couldn't ever do that.

I whispered, "Just hate me."

"Circe!"

"I can't let you help me Gavin," I said my voice frail, "Not on this. I'm sorry. Just let me handle this alone please. It's the last time. I promise you I'll start sharing things with you, but only after this."

He expelled another huge gush of air and shook his head. He no longer looked surprised by my stubbornness, instead he appeared more resigned.

"I was really hoping you would man up. What can I expect of someone who thinks they're like some martyr, or something?"

My eyes began to tear up again and my mouth clamped shut. I watched him shuffle off, looking down at his feet, shoulders shrunk in.

"This is the only answer I can give you," I called after him, "I'm sorry Gavin."

I didn't know trying to protect my brother would backfire like this. It was far worse than anything I could have imagined, and I was clueless on how to fix it.

Nana's voice rang through the woods.

Without a question all the yelling hadn't gone unnoticed. In fact, it was quite surprising that she'd not trudged down to break up the fight.

"Circe? Gavin," Nana yelled not too far off, "What's going on you two?"

"I'M COMING," Gavin bellowed far too loud.

Gavin turned pointing at me, and it felt like a laser spearing through me.

"I'm not playing games with you anymore," he coldly informed me, "I'm going to figure out what you're hiding from me on my own."

My heart started pounding. The vision of the bloody Vampire coming out of our home filled my head.

He'd die if he did. I knew that. Gavin didn't stand a chance.

"Gavin," I warned, desperately pleading, "Please just leave it to me. This last time. You really don't want to do this. It isn't something that you can easily stumble into. You'll die."

Walking backward my brother shrugged.

"And you won't," he questioned, "It's your choice."

My eyebrows shot sky high.

"Why are you acting like this," I asked breathless with dread.

I could feel deep within my bones something horrible was going to happen.

"If you don't want me to figure out what happened on my own, then tell me. If not, I'll just find the damn person myself."

He wasn't looking for a person though. He was looking for a Vampire!

"You are going get yourself killed Gavin! I'm serious! This isn't something you can just bull your head through! This is a death sentence! It's not your average everyday murder!"

Gavin stopped walking. His head tiled to the side, and his eyebrows crunched together in thought.

My heart pounded.

I quickly wondered if I had accidently said too much. What if he remembered?

"I never thought their murders were going to be easy, but that right there," he stated, nodding in the direction that I had puked, "that and what you said…well, it says your hiding a hell of a lot."

I bit my lips to hide their quiver.

"Your secrets are what's going to get you killed Circe. I don't even need to be Nana to tell you that much," he shook his head, spinning on his heel, "You're too proud. You can't do everything on your own."