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Miserable Wanderer

A massive nerd dies and gets reincarnated, his excitement gets the best of him. The first words he hear are "Get to work slaves!" When he looks around and sees grotesque figures mining with oversized pickaxes his stomach drops to his colon. [Multiverse fanfic, starting in Warframe.] "Status." [Status displaying] Race: Grineer[100%] Level: 0 Status points Available: 0 Stats: Vitality: 1 Strength: 1 Agility: 1 Intellect: .3 Mastery Rank: 0 [Inventory] Strength Quote. "USELESS DISGUSTING MAGGOT FILTHY WORM WHY ARE YOU BREATHING MY AIR !"-Councilor Vay Hek The cosmos weeps at this mans fortune. A distant "FUCK MY LIFE" can be heard Cover not mine THERE WILL BE MULTIVERSE TRAVEL JUST NOT IN THE TRADITIONAL SENSE.

SoupHarbinger · Video Games
Not enough ratings
85 Chs

Roundtable

"Uh, they got ballistas."

Beyond the gate 3 ballista loom over cliff faces, their flaming arrows glowing against the rock.

"Sirs, a grace!"

A floating yellow thingy ma bob levitates just to the right of the stormveil gate.

Sellen points her index finger towards the grace

"Yea that has to be one of the bonfires..."

We approach the grace, a warm sensation comes over me as I close in on it.

Voices whisper to me as I near it, but they remain just out of reach.

Sellen holds her robes and kneels down onto her legs and reaches out to the grace, light comes from it and wraps her hand lightly.

"Thus is the power of the shattered.."

Sellen whispers lightly, almost reminiscent as the light swirls to her forearm.

"Dont be peckish, gather round."

Sellen invites us to sit and I oblige.

I reach my hand out to the grace but when the light is about to meet my hand it curves and warps, trying to avoid it.

I chase after it with my hand but it hurriedly swirls, trying to get away from my touch.

"It seems the grace of gold has forsaken you... young lord."

Sons of bitches shit ass world. Everything is out to get me.

Leo holds his hand out and the light dashes towards him, from where I am sitted.

GODAMNIT I AM THE PROTAGONIST WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME!

"The roundtable, it is calling to me. I cant believe it..."

Sellens eyes widen slightly, her lower lip jitering as she speaks.

"Well let's go then."

Sellen dips her hand into the deepest sections of the grace and a blinding light shines out blinding me.

After a few seconds of being flash banged and having a pillow sack put over my head I am able to open my eyes up.

"We have arrived."

Sellen stands in front of a open set of humongous double doors.

I look around for a second but get jumpsacred by the gollum looking ass old woman lying 'dead' on a pedestal, oh and the massive 2 fingers that's fun too.

Sellen creeps through the doors timidly and the silent crackling of the hearth does not help to break the tension.

But most of all. Where all da people?

Like literally, this place is empty.

*bang*

*bang*

The sound of a hammer smacking metal clangs loud and clear, its seems master Hewg is hard at work still.

"More tarnished.... Welcome.."

A gangly voice speaks to us from the leftmost hallway.

A man in a Sauron looking helmet wearing brown robes stands holding a big ass book in his arms.

"Sellen.... interesting seeing you here."

Sellen clutches her staff with a grimace, her knuckles turning white.

"Gideon' Offnir."

"Fallen from grace have you, little witch. Now acting as maiden... Such a foolish facade. No better to behest than that where Fia, reaching out to others to protect yourself from thine own mistakes. Such a antiquated school of thought only a forsaken runt like you could manager to muster."

Oh god, it's one of the famous Gideon Offnir monologues.

Sellens face grows bright red, with both blush and hatred.

"Y-you- !"

Before she could rebuttal Gideon chuckles.

"What now, going to sic your 2 little followers on me, then after get them to lick your little phalanges and please you, or will you clutch them in bed like Fia, or do you prefer blood like Rykard? Little Sellen the failed witch who could not grasp the beyond with her abhorrent glintstone magicks that could narry match my power."

Did this motherfucket just call me a toe licking simp? ME THE PROTAGONIST BEING TREATED LIKE A MOB CHARACTER?!?!

Gideon claps the book shut.

"Pfft. Got your trousers bunched now have I big one? Why dont you go lie with Fia for a bit. hehe."

My hand clutches into a fist and my kagune begins leaking out of my shoulder.

"Those eyes... that's new.. What is it now? Blood stone magicks?"

"You little soyjack Marika simp bitch. I will fucking murder you. Goblin looking freak of nature. You are projecting a bit arent you bud? Living through the tarnished vicariously a little bit hoping you get the gawk gawk from the golden order you fiendish little slime, and firstly Fia and Sellen arent even my type you imbecilic mental retard!"

Gideon stands silently.

We all stare awkwardly for about 2 minutes.

"I must return to my study."

Gideon begins walking backwards while staring at us dead silent.

Leo looks to me

"What is your type anyway?"

..

"It is too refined for you to tangibly understand my padawan."

*ahem*

Sellen coughs into her hand.

"Uh why are we here again?"

Sellen looks around momentarily.

"I was hoping to see Rogier here but it seems he is not here."

I look around and go to the balcony where Rogier dies in the game, but the chair is empty.

Gripping the balconies rails for a moment I ponder.

..

Hmmm.

.

You only live once.

I leap over the balcony and into the grand plaza below.

A cold mist grips the room and fog gates appear on all the exits, the once humming rythm of the roundtable stops leaving only creaking silence.

[Invaded by Mad Tongue Albrecht]

A red figure rises from a misty circle, ice warps around him as he steps out of the circle.

He points his scythe out at me.

"Let it be known that I see through your lies."

What is he talking about.

He swipes is scythe out like a bloodborne character and grips it with 2 hands, bending his legs to attack.

I hold my fists up in a protective stance.

"Come get some bastard!"

My kagune warps around my body, wrapping my shoulder tightly.

Albrecht charges forward, his scythe moving in a icy blur, feeling a chill to my side I go to dodge but it's too late, the scythe blade smashes into my kagune covered shoulder, pain shoots through the right side of my body.

I sidestep and lower my neck, the blade sweeps over the top of my head, Albrecht rolls backwards and pulls out a staff from his belt.

He holds it up and a flurry of ice spikes fire at me, I run to the left, circling the spells until they dissipate.

He pulls out his scythe and charges again,

I pull the axe out of my inventory and sweep forward with it, Albrecht screeches to a halt and rolls to the side, dodging my attack.

He dashes back and pulls out his staff.

He holds the staff to the scythe and it glows blue, the head of the scythe grows triple in length and size.

He holds the scythe and screams with rage, blood briers cover his body, blood leaks all over the floor in a pool and his scythe grows larger and larger.

With a mighty roar he swipes the scythe at me, a giant wave of blue comes out of it and charges at me.

My axe blows up in flames and I begin pumping all my Qi reserves into my body.

I hold the axe high above my head and prepare to strike down at the huge arc of magic.

*SLAM*

A massive explosion covers the room in smoke, my arms ache intensely.

The dust clears and I see something quite unfortunate.

The head of my axe lay broken and splintered. RIP...

I drop the pole of the axe and raise my guard.

Albrecht stands silently. Blood drips off his body and his breathing is loud and labored.

"Mein blood... Shed for your death. This graced floor stained by thine presence.. Foul beast."

Albrecht holds out a short rapier shakily.

My kagune flares up and wraps my right arm.

I'm all out of Qi so I need to be careful.

Albrecht hobbles forward, huffing like a truck.

"I will not be taken."

He takes his rapier and points it to his stomach.

With a loud squelch the blade goes completely through him. Blood pours out from his face but a dark cold energy surrounds him.

The phantom of a white dragon looms over his head.

Phase 2!?!?!?!?

"Mein blood... Will not be taken lightly."

The dragon phantom roars and the roundtable hold shakes and trembles.

I raise my fists and breath, trying to get a grip on the situation.

Albrechts body is covered in the shadow of a lesser dragon.

He charges forward and punches straight to my face.

Kyokushin karate takes over and we begin exchanging blows back and forth, each hit to his body making wind gusts around us.

After dodging a swipe I activate Kaioken and launch my fist straight at his liver.

[10 Renpatsu]!!!

My fist flashes, afterimages glowing against his side.

He throws up blood as I plow his squishy organs with my fists.

"No!"

He screams and a sphere of wind blasts me.

I clutch my feet to the ground but I still fly back a few feet.

"I...wont...die."

Albrechts dragon powers fade and he stands barely alive, his right side dented inwards.

He feebly raises his arm and walks at me angrily.

I raise my knee and jump into the air.

I flip my legs around and roundhouse kick him in the head, with an explicit crunch he falls over.

"N....o."

[Invader defeated]

I'm about fucking tired of this world...

-----

Based and red pilled song reccomendation.

It's Hell Down Here - The Amity Affliction.

[A/N]

No I'm not dead..

Final exams have been going on and I had to sweat to pass them..