1 Origins: Eri

It hurts.

Those words echo in my head once again through the pain. As I'm broken down and put back together again more times than I can count, those are the only words that repeat in my mind. I wish it would stop.

"We're done for today, Eri. Now, head on back to your room and don't cause any trouble." That man said as I was rebandaged and untied from the chair again.

"I would hate to have to get my hands dirty, do you understand?" He said, looking me in the eye. I could feel the pressure and promise from those words. He would kill someone again if I tried to escape.

But it hurts.

I don't like it here.

I want to leave.

I want someone to save me.

I want Onee-chan to save me.

But, I don't want anyone to get hurt.

"Yes" I could only turn my eyes away from him and nod my head.

"Good. You're such a good girl, Eri. Go, your sister is back from her trip. You shouldn't keep her waiting," He said and the suffocating pressure disappeared. Although I was terrified, I was still happy that Onee-chan was finally back. I was starting to get lonely. This was the first time either one of us had left this place before and I wondered what she had done while outside. I wanted to know what the outside was like.

-----

I was led down the halls by another man in a mask. For some reason everyone here wore one, except for me. Even Onee-chan wore one, though It was pretty scary looking compared to everyone else's.

"Tsk. Hurry it up would ya," I was having a hard time keeping up with his long steps and that seemed to annoy him. He roughly grabbed my arm to drag me along faster as I had to repress a yelp. I could feel the wounds reopening on that arm and blood starting to soak through the bandages again.

I wish Onee-chan could understand stuff like this isn't normal. I want her to be upset over our treatment like I am. Unfortunately Onee-chan was raised differently from me. I don't know why but she seems to think all this is normal. I don't want to believe she went through worse things than I have but it's the only way I can accept her for who she is. Although I don't want her to get hurt either, I secretly wish she were so how I feel about her wouldn't change. I guess I really am a bad girl…

"We're here. Get inside and don't come out. Got it, brat!" The man said once we got to the door. I didn't like this one. The last person that watched us at least pretended to care about us. I only nodded with my head down like I always do. He already made it clear he doesn't like it very much when I speak, which is why he only asks yes or no questions. In fact a lot of people here don't like it when I speak but I can't understand why.

I feel like it's because they are comparing me with Onee-chan but even I think that's a little unreasonable…

"Tsk" he clicked his teeth and shoved me through the door before locking it behind him.

Due to being pushed so hard I stumbled through the door unable to get a proper footing. Just as I braced myself to hit the floor, I found myself wrapped in a familiar warm embrace accompanied by comforting dead silence. Hesitantly I turn my eyes up to see who it is, just in case…

"..."

'Woah! That was close. Good thing your awesome Onee-chan was here to save the day! Hehe, you can praise me if you want! Don't be shy!' There she goes again getting excited all on her own, or at least that's what I imagined she would say if she could talk.

I look up to see a face almost identical to my own except for a few key differences like her turquoise eyes and her horn (which seems to be getting smaller now that I look at it) on the opposite side to my own. The most obvious difference being the blood red mask with sharp looking crossed teeth covering the lower half of her face. Although it was scary looking, I wasn't really afraid of it. In fact I was a little envious of the smile it forced her to always have plastered on her face. Strange how It always brought me comfort even though I secretly hated it all the same.

"...?" Her eyebrows furrowed slightly as she looked me over. Onee-chan is strange. She doesn't do things like other people. When her eyes scan over me, I know she's learning more about me than words could possibly convey.

But something seems different this time. The look in her eyes doesn't hold the same slight confusion and amusement they usually do, as if she were looking at a creature she couldn't possibly understand but found enjoyment in trying. No, now they look tired, like she wanted to ask something but couldn't possibly understand how to do so.

Seeing the clear worry in her eyes, I felt my tears welling up again being held in her arms. Equally bandaged as my own, though the stench of blood was slightly more noticeable. I circled my arms around her back and buried my head in her chest. Something was different about her. Something happened outside that changed her. Yet even if I asked, I know she wouldn't be able to tell me in a way I could understand.

I hate that I can't understand her. If I could, maybe she wouldn't be so used to putting others before herself. Maybe I could be her shoulder to cry on instead of the other way around. But maybe it's for the better that I can't. If I could, I worry that I may not be able to look at her the same ever again.

I hate these conflicting feelings. I love my sister. I love her comforting warmth. I love the worry she shows me. But I also hate my sister. I hate that I can't understand her. I hate that I can't hide behind a mask like she does. I hate that she isn't as broken as I am. That she doesn't have to go through the same things as I do. But I don't want her to get hurt. I wish she would stop smiling. But her smile is the only thing that makes me feel safe, even if it is just a mask. I hate that I don't really know how she feels.

So lost in my thoughts, I didn't notice she had taken me to our shared bed until I felt her hand slowly and gently patting my head. Nor was I able to notice the sharp glint that appeared in her eyes as she hugged me tighter.

'Everything will be alright, Eri. I'm here now. I'll always be here for you.' I imagined she would say, gently while the strength of her hug increased. I could no longer stop my tears from flowing and I cried in her arms, slowly drifting to sleep.

----

Suddenly I was being frantically shaken without warning. I felt like I heard Onee-chan's hazy voice calling out to me, but that's impossible, she can't talk. I guess I fell asleep crying again. Still, Onee-chan usually let's me sleep as long as I like…

Opening my eyes slightly I could barely make out my favorite shade of turquoise in my groggy state…

'Eri, come on, we don't have much time! We have to go!' Seeing as I was still being shaken, I quickly woke myself up from my comfortable sleep. A skill I had to develop over the years lest one of our watchers get annoyed waiting.

"Onee-chan? Where are we going?" I asked while trying to focus my still blurred eyes on her. The lights were still off in the room but I could just barely make out her figure through the light shining from the hall. It was then that I noticed an all too familiar and disgusting scent.

"Wha-" Blood. Onee-chan was covered in a very thick coat of blood with her turquoise eyes shining in the relatively dark room. She looked scary but I still couldn't find it in myself to be afraid of her because I could see the conflict and pain in her eyes. She looked like she had done something she would never forgive herself for, yet still determined to see it through.

Although I was still stunned by the sight, Onee-chan wasted no time and pulled me by the hand leading me out of the bed and through the door running. Taking a quick look behind me, I was able to see the collapsed figure of our new caretaker, lying unmoving in a pool of blood.

Is he dead? Did Onee-chan kill him?

Did someone die because of me again?

I don't want this. I don't want Onee-chan to get her hands dirty because of me.

But I don't want to stay here anymore.

I want to be free with Onee-chan.

But what if he came after us? I don't know what to do.

'Don't worry, Eri! I'll protect you!' I wanted Onee-chan to tell me. I wanted to be selfish and leave all my problems to her. But that's not fair.

I should just let her go and tell her to go on without me. A bad girl like me doesn't deserve freedom. To be happy. To be with Onee-chan.

"...!"

Just as I was about to let go, pulling me out of my spiraling thoughts, Onee-chan's grip on my hand got stronger and she turned to look me in the eye. I felt all of my worries fade away. Seeing her scary looking mask but clear eyes took all my worries away.

Onee-chan can't speak, but I felt I could always kind of tell what she wanted to say just by looking in her eyes.

"Un!" I nodded and strengthened my grip while trying to pick up my pace. Onee-chan's quirk must make her really amazing because it was kind of hard to keep up with her. Unlike my quirk that could only make things disappear like papa…

-----

We made it pretty far with Onee-chan quickly taking out anyone blocking our path until suddenly Onee-chan pulled me really hard to her then jumped to the side. Before I was even able to wonder why, I heard a bang sound and barely saw something zoomed past where I was standing a few moments ago.

"I missed. I knew it was a bad idea to train her. Stuff like this never turns out as planned." Looking back I could see another group of men coming out of a hallway that wasn't there before. I saw a man in a black cloak and mask with a smoking gun in his hands aiming at us. There looked to be only five of them but I knew these were the ones Overhaul recently started to keep closest to him. Onee-chan had beaten bigger groups on the way here but I was worried.

Onee-chan stopped in her tracks and simply glared at them with a viciousness I had never seen from her before. Truthfully, I guess I never really knew much about Onee-chan in the first place. I don't even know her name. We've always been together yet I know nothing about her. She was usually away most of the time and since she doesn't talk I don't know what she does. I've really only been selfishly projecting my desires onto her .

"Tsk, what are ya doing, brats!? Hurry back to your room before we have to get violent! I want to go back to sleep!" The really really big one shouted at us, causing me to flinch a little.

"Idiot, as if they would just go back because you asked. This has been a long time comin, just like I said when we started." The one with the gun dressed in all black said. Even though I couldn't see his face, I could hear the clear disdain he had for us in his tone.

"Oiiii! Why donchaaa tooo bratsss come on baaack before you get hurt!" The one with the furry vest shouted out while pouring a strong smelling drink down his throat.

A part of me wanted to agree and just go back so no one else would be hurt, but I still want to be free with Onee-chan.

"..."

Onee-chan, as expected of course, said nothing, instead choosing to move me behind her back.

'Just stay still, Eri. It'll be over before you know it.' I couldn't help imagining what Onee-chan would be saying when she turned to look at me from the corner of her eyes. Even though she was only a little taller than me, I thought her back looked very big at that moment.

Her and her single horn started to glow the same beautiful turquoise as her eyes. She clenched her fists and it looked like veins of flowing light spread across her entire body. She looked so strong. So pretty. I wish I could be like her.

------

Although the fight seemed long, in the end just like I wanted, it was over before I knew it. Onee-chan stood there, nearly unscathed aside from a few scratches and bruises, trying to catch her breath. surrounded by the still bodies of those men. I wasn't sure if some were still alive, but it didn't matter right now. Onee-chan had won.

She fought hard and against all odds, came out on top. She looked so cool. So strong. I wanted to be just like her. I subconsciously stepped towards her. I wanted to make sure she was okay. I wanted to take her hand and run away together. Perhaps noticing me she turned around and smiled towards me.

"..."

'See, Eri. I told you I would protect you!' I wanted her to say cheerfully. Instead she just silently gave me a sort of eye smile while trying to catch her breath. I wish she wouldn't put up a strong front in front of me. I can tell she's tired. Much more than she wants to let on. Her horn is almost non-existent now. Barely even a little nub. It was always smaller than mine, but when did it get so small? What happens when it's gone? I feel like I already know but I'm too afraid to ask.

"Onee-chan…" I felt the tears welling up again looking at her like this. I hated seeing her look so hurt but I was happy we could finally be free.

"Let's go Onee-" Just before I could finish my words…

"!!!" I saw Onee-chan's eyes widen before she shoved me out of the way. I was confused as to why she would do that until I felt and saw it…

*RUMBLE!* *PUCHI!"

...Onee-chan was stabbed by several stone spikes that suddenly came out of the ground.

"Eh?" I wasn't sure how long passed before that slipped out. I was confused. Didn't she win? Aren't we free now? I was still confused until a very familiar pressure descended on me. How could I forget?

"Didn't I tell you not to cause trouble, Eri." Even though I heard his voice. Even though that pressure didn't disappear. I suddenly couldn't bring myself to care anymore.

"Onee-chan?" I got back up and continued to walk towards her. The spikes had receded and she fell to the ground limp. Even though I understand what's happening, I don't understand at all. Why can't I understand?

"This is your fault, you know? If you had just sat in your room like you were supposed to, none of this would have happened." I knew he was right. I shouldn't have gone with Onee-chan. If I stayed she could have made it out on her own. If she didn't have to protect me. If I wasn't so weak…

"Onee-chan…"I fell to my knees by her side and looked at the holes riddling her body. This is my fault. I should have just listened. Grabbing her hand, I put my head down as tears trailed down my face. I didn't notice my horn elongating on my head nor the slight crimson glow that followed.

"I-I'm sorry, I-…" Looking through my tears I could see Onee-chan still smiling yet somehow it looked more beautiful than it ever had before. I hadn't even realized her mask fell off during that last attack. It was the first time I had ever seen her face and despite the situation, I couldn't help but to be taken aback by the clear love and affection it displayed. She was…really pretty…

Somewhere in my mind, I always thought I was just selfishly forcing my expectations onto her. That she never truly cared about me and that it was all in my imagination. That behind her mask was just a cold smile at best or one of complete indifference like everyone else here. But now, I know the truth. She really did love me. And yet, I was going to lose her just like that?

Although it was just as warm as it always was, I could feel her hand growing colder and colder by the second. Was she going to die? And just leave me alone like that? How could she be so selfish!?

"Tsk. Still as tenacious as ever huh, Cain? Everything would have been fine if you both just did what I told you. Now I have to clean up your mess." I could see his legs in front as he looked down at us.

"I thought we would always be together," I don't want this. I knew he wouldn't save her even if I begged. This is my punishment for disobeying him.

"You said you would stay by my side," Even if I had one-sidedly thought so on my part, I didn't care anymore. I can't do this anymore. It hurts too much.

"Enough with your temper tantrums, Eri. Let's go," He reached out his hand to grab me but before he could some blood tendrils sprouted from the ground around us and stabbed his hand.

"DoO…. NOooT…. Tuuoouch… Eeer!" Onee-chan said, glaring at him with her last bit of strength. Huh? Said? Onee-chan actually said something?

"Tsk! Still defying me! Hmm? Blood? Since when could you do that? I knew you were hiding something, but to think it was another quirk. Such a shame, you had so much potential." He said touching his wound and instantly restoring it and his glove to perfect health. Completely ignoring what was maybe Onee-chan's first words. Adopted or not, he's not a very good father…

Or so I thought…

"And I'm sure I told you once already. Don't open your damn mouth!" He said, raising his voice. He looked ready to erase her right then and there. And he probably would have if I were not here beside her. I'm tired of this. I just want to disappear. The horn on my head suddenly began to give off a warm and bright crimson light.

"Hmm!!?" It was then that I felt that strange power flow through me again. Just like it had when Papa disappeared. My quirk. My curse.

"E-e-eri…what-?" I could barely make out Onee-chan's voice amidst the pain. That's right, it'll all be over if I just disappear. I could feel it trying to work on my body and everything around me. I'm scared to disappear but if I did, everything would be better. It's scary but I have to.

"If I disappear-" Before I could finish I suddenly found myself wrapped in a familiar warmth.

"Silly girl. Didn't I tell you I would always be with you? Where are you trying to go off all on your own? You could at least ask me to go with you" Onee-chan said, pulling me into a tight hug. If I could look up I would see the horn on her head growing and shrinking sporadically while her crimson bandages circled around us protectively.

Her voice wasn't as raspy as before and it sounded so beautiful.. I felt like I could get lost in its sound and drift off into a peaceful sleep forever.

Ah. That's right. Onee-chan is with me. I don't have to go alone.

"I can't let you do that, Eri. I still need you. You're my key to the future." I had forgotten about him but it doesn't matter anymore. Just a little longer and we'll be gone.

"Hmm? Blood? Together? I see. Fine, you both want to be together so bad? Then I'll make sure you never come apart again!" I was confused by what he meant and looked up from Onee-chan's shoulder only to see his hand grab my and Onee-chan's heads.

And then, just before everything went dark.

Though in the fog of my mind, I was suddenly flooded with images, no… memories. Two sets of memories. Both long since forgotten in detail. Experienced for the first and second time as if we were reading a story. Memories of my sister, my other half, of myself. Both converging into a single moment. This moment.

The moment 'we' were born.

[A/N: Gaslighting with Chisaki was incredibly uncomfortable to write. Drop a stone for moral support 😣]