3 Confusion

........Before the dream.......

....Zack....

"I...I always liked..."I hesitate for a moment, this could be the biggest step in my life... I can do it, take a deep breath. 

"Like what?" She asks looks forward to my approaching words.

"Yo... Your red scarf" I confused,She looks at me. I can see she is was not expect me to say that.

This is harder than I thought "coward". The relationship between me and her could be described as one of fantasy, but I still chase after her. 

"You like it huh. It's a gift from a childhood friend of mind..." she says interrupting me.

"H... he died in a car accident" She adds, I almost skipped a heart beat at that moment, because I also lost something to car accident-my memories.

"I...I am so sorry" I whispered. I didn't know what to say. This is not what I was expecting to hear.

"Is okay." She says  as she walks to words me.

"His always alive..." she takes a deep breath then continues.

"...here" she points to her heart "But whenever I see you-you remind me of him" great a dead boyfriend that haunts my girls hart.

"You know you remind me of him... I mean you are like his twin brother just bigger Of course I now he didn't have one, which is weird" she gaze at the blue sky.

"Your light brown eyes, wave hair, your shape vigorous, everything about you is defined."

"You sure you aren't him?" She say with uncertainty on her voice. "No I...I am not him" I respond.

If I could answer that question with confidence, but that is impossible sense I am not sure who I am.

She looks at me, "Okay" she says "let us get going" changing the mood I see, she's not the type to dowel in sad moment, at list I think.

"We are walking right?"

"Yeah" I answer. Who wouldn't want to walk home in beautiful gentle spring day.

Man I love spring and fall more then summer and winter. For as long as I can remember, which isn't long. I held a weird feeling about this season even the word Spring makes my heart heavy and I don't know why. 

We start walking toward down town, go through punch of green light, and  I am lost on looking at her like always.

The first day we met, well,it was love by first sight. She took huge part of my heart, every since that day I try my best to confuse my feelings to her, you can call it an acquired love.

Anyway I usually love history, but today-today wasn't my day.  "choice a period of history to research, and work on. If you can't choice I will choice it for you". My teacher told everyone, accept me.

You see I was sleeping the entire class, so I missed everything he said, and as you can tell the teacher select for me. Guest what "Middle ages" I hate this history class.

One side the girl I like can't get over her dead crash who happens to look like, and at the other hand my history teacher gives me the most popular part of history, the medieval or should I call it the most unpleasant timeline. My life couldn't get better than this ugh.

You know I occasionally wonder what's like to live in such era

On top of everything that happened today I end up confessing my love to her scarf,so un cool man.

We stopped on small shop to buy something to drink.

"What are you getting?" she ask.

"Hmm... one large papaya" I order.

"One large papaya coming" she says.

"What about you miss?" I ask her.

"Hmm... one medium strawberry" she says.

"That is one nice choice oh great one" I say laughing.

We buy our drinks, and continue our walk as I go back to my imagination, fantasizing.

"So, Zack do you have plans for future?" She asks pulling me out of my imagination.

"Huh? What do you mean"? I look at her blinking.

"I mean what do you want to do after graduation"? She adds.

I really have many things in mind. I don't know what to tell her?

"Hey answer me, Zack" she says moving forward to block my way.

I stop to look at her shinning face, bewitching eyes, and here curiosities... Waite  what am I thinking? She is waiting for answer.

"L-let's see I have many things in my mind like teacher, soldier, artists, author ect"

"But which one do you have in mind now?" She just got even more curious.

"Umm I think I would say author"

"What?"

"Y-yeah"

"Really..really"

"Yep"

"Oow  wow that's so cool, I will be the first to read your books, just make sure that they are really good. can I watch you write?"

"No you can't" Emma, I mumble her name under my breath. I mean I will be busy on her instead of writing anything right.

"Hey look we reached your house see you" I say as I bush her to her house.

"Hey wait stop I can walk on my own" She says.

"Oh can you, so why are you trying so hard not to move huh?" I ask her.

"Can you let go of my shoulders now"? She says. Then I realized I was bushing her shoulders hard that it started to horde her.

Then she turns around to face me with a series face. I knew she was about to ask a question. A question I can't answer.

"You keep running from me like am some kind of..." she stops, and looks at me in the eyes "What am I to you?" She stares with consistent eyes.

A friend? Or someone I like? I can't answer the question. What should I do? What is the best answer? Think Zack, think.

"We are Friends right" 

"Yeah we are but I....I thought..... you know what just forget about it"

I slowly take step back, and started walking. I think she had something in her heart that she wanted to tell me, but she couldn't.

I stop for a moment then turn around to see if she is still standing there, and I see her as she slams the door behind her "close".

She is angry. I guess I will see her tomorrow.