2 Entry Two

Sept. 14, 2015

I couldn't believe it. Mrs. Taylor did the unthinkable, she actually a-a-apo-apologized to me. Yesterday, I brought her afternoon coffee on time as promised.

My head bowed all the way while I stood next to her waiting for her to finish it so that I could clean up after she’s done. Nothing I ever did was right in the eyes of Mr. and Mrs. Taylor, so I wasn’t surprised when I felt the burn of the hot coffee on my face because apparently, it was "too sweet". What surprised me was her shocked expression after her outburst and the regret that I think I saw in her eyes.

She stood up, grabbed the towel on my hand, and wiped my face apologizing to me in a voice that couldn't be anything but caring.

To be truthful, I didn't know exactly what happened next, because I was too shocked to pay attention to anything. My body went rigid and my heartbeat was so fast. I was afraid of a surprise attack that would only make my burning face sting.

They didn't usually damage my face because outside these four confining walls we were a perfect family and "the daughter of a perfect family” can never have bruises or cuts that can be seen by thousands of judgmental people.

When either Mr. or Mrs. Taylor ends up bruising my face, they don't apologize or have regret-filled eyes. Instead, they shout and say "See what you made me do?". It’s usually my fault.

Sometimes I forget myself and end up tripping in front of them or prioritizing my school work instead of my chores. I don't blame them at those times, I should never forget myself and be klutzy. During those times, I wouldn't be allowed to go out of the house until my wounds have completely healed, but it's not like I have a life outside of this house anyway. This is my only place in the world, this is where I belong.

So the way that she treated me after that incident made me feel loved, hoping that they really were changing. I felt so happy that I barely felt the pain from the coffee burn. My face had a permanent smile on it, that I just knew must've looked weird because of how Mr. and Mrs. Taylor were looking at me.

Anyway, Mr. and Mrs. Taylor have been treating me differently since I got you. I wonder if they really do plan on finishing me off and their treatment is like a way of giving me sympathy before I'm finally gone from their lives forever.

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