Chapter - 3 His Eyes

His brown eyes strikes with mine. It looks as if a halo of moon mixed with sun is glancing at me. His eyes stare at me, cluster of emotions passing through them. Then he stills. Staring at me for a second before waving me inside the room.

Smell of wood marches inside my nose. I look at the big window of his room. Opening to a large tree, the leaves are moving with the catharsis of wind.

I yelp in surprise when he closes the door with a bang.

"Shanvi thank God you are here. Tell him. Tell him he's wrong. What he's trying to do isn't good. " Sahana looks at me with pleading voice.

I continue to stare at him. His face seems like the most perfect painting ever made. Small slant of moonlight covers his face. Dressed in grey handmade tux with a black shirt underneath he looks thousand times better than any model or actor. His dark brown hair seems so soft my hand itches to touch it. I still remember when we were kids , it was more curly of sort. His golden skin looks like a bunch of sunflowers.

But I don't like his troubled eyes.

Sahana's impeding voice shakes me out of my thoughts. " What are you thinking about, why don't you say anything? "

I feel hopeless. What can I say? what can I say when his eyes are looking so sad.

" Look I don't know what you both are thinking, but I am not doing this okay? I am not getting into any shit public announcement of this shit relationship. "

I gape at her in shock.

" Repeat it. " Kiyansh says with a thunderous undertone in his voice.

A guttural stillness pass for a second.

Sahana's face turns beetroot red as if the meaning of what she just said dawned on her. " No. no. I didn't mean that. No. Kiyansh. " she stutters.

" Oh you perfectly meant that. " He spits then saunters towards his bed and removes the perfectly folded comforter. He digs out what looked like pictures from below it. Throwing it on the floor.

Two pictures land on my feet, I crouch down with wide eyes.

In both the pictures Sahana was kissing a man, a man whose face I recognised. He was a new model. I had seen him twice with Sahana before. I remember she once brought him on my film set, saying she had to do an ad with him near my studio.

My eyes scoot towards Kiyansh who's standing with no sense of emotion on his face. He seems as if he's just staring at a wall. While Sahana is weeping like someone has just informed her, that her favourite candy will not be produced anymore. She stumbles forward almost groping his arms. " Kiyansh it was just a fling. Just a fling. I ...it meant nothing, I promise. He just came at me and..."

Something churned inside me. Seriously?

"We are done" he gave her a smile like the ancients did when they trapped a running animal on their wake.

My bones chilled. I knew that voice. It was a voice of him no one would wish they ever heard. It was not a statement. It was a decision. A command.

Having understood that she would get no response from him. She jolted towards me. Just as she was about to grab me.

Kiyansh's voice boomed through the room like a slash of sword, " Don't touch her."

My heart jumbled.

She became stock- still. Silence took over the room. My eyes galloped to find his burning gaze looking straight at me.

"Out."

I looked at him in confusion. Was it me to whom he said " don't touch her." Maybe he didn't want me to be there. Spectrum of emotions passed through me, pain, shame, uncertainty. It all hit me in one strike. I told myself to not cry over and over again. Hiding the shame I turned towards the gate.

" Not you. " He said almost irritatingly.

I wiped the tears from my face hoping he did not see them. Pathetic me.

I hated this. Hated being so weak in front of him. I always hated the fact that I listened to whatever he said. Like a stupid teenager.

But you love him. The voice inside my head doesn't stop.

I counted to five before I turned back again.

" I said out. " He looked at her like she was a swarming fly.

" Please " she ventured to him one last time. Before wiping her tears, looking at me accusingly, what? and storming out of the room.

Silence descended over the room for minutes after she left. We both didn't utter a single word.

I was confused and angry.

And sad. He must be so sad.

" Why are you crying? And why did you think I would ever tell you to get out of the room?" The softness of his tone made me look up at him.

I wiped at my face stupefied to find that I was crying and didn't know I was. " I am sorry. "

" You don't have to be sorry about anything. You know I hate it when you cry. Now you didn't answer me. Have I ever asked you to get out of the room? " He asked as if he was talking to a petulant child.

I hated this. He is the one who needs comforting not me.

"I don't know. Are you fine? " I controlled my urge to rub my nose.

" You want to rub your nose. Do it. " He discerned, evading my question.

I scoff. " I am fine. Talk about yourself. When did you know? "

" A month ago. " He exhales, shaking his head ruefully , he sits at the edge of his childhood bed. I remember where I used to throw snacks at him. He always liked to be clean and I pestered him until he listened to me. " He's not the only one, " he adds.

My eyes widen. Not the only one? The guilt of not knowing gnaws at me. With it, shock but then sadness, even though I don't want to accept, He loved her too much.

Too much to never see that you love him. I scowl at my inner self.

" Why did you lie to me then? About announcing your relationship? "

His tone was forlorn when he said, " I didn't want to trouble you. I know how you are."

" Trouble. Seriously !? Trouble? " I look at him accusingly but an unsettling feeling takes over me. " You lied to me because of her."

His head lifted in a flash. "What?"

" I don't like the fact that you lied to me and didn't tell me about her. That, like a fool I accompanied your girlfriend and believed that you were going to tell our family members about her". It pained me and hurt me to say all of this. And even angered me that I was blaming him. But this was not fair. He should have told me.

" Shanvi, no, you're wrong. I would never lie to you. You are my best friend. I know you since childhood, I know how honest you are. And I didn't wanted you to lie for me." Honest my foot if he knew about lying almost all my life to even myself sometimes and to people that he was just a best friend and I didn't feel anything else about him.

I stare at the brown wooden floor and wonder how the colour matches his eyes. How beautiful and troubled his eyes looked.

The click of his black oxford leather shoes comes to my view. I know he is standing close to me, the current passing through me illustrates that. He takes one step again and we are standing impossibly close without standing on each other's foot. Control yourself, I tell myself, he doesn't mean it like that.

His muscle bound arms comes around me. I almost shudder, I take a step back but his other arm comes around and holds me tightly.

" Look at me." his soft plea wavers my heart and I automatically look into his eyes. Slowly he removed his right arm around me, with some hesitation his right hand touch my cheeks.

" What are you doing?" I am able to get out the words from my almost dying state.

"Please " his voice sounds agonizing.

And I melt.

My hands automatically moves towards his cheeks. The fresh whiff of shaving gel and chocolate mixed with musty smell of cinnamon woodpine takes over me. His soft smooth skin reminds me of the time when I used to irritate him by squishing his cheeks. But then the memory of when I wanted to touch it like I used to strikes .

He closes his eyes. I catch him off guard and move back releasing myself fron his arms.