7 Heaven knows I’m miserable now

#6

A new week began after the madness of the live night. Apparently we did well, as Maka said. Even Poos said we rocked hard that night. What a pity I don't recall much of it.

I was a bit uneasy facing Maka again after what happened, but at school she approached me as usual and never said anything about it again – it was just like that time we listened to the Smiths together on the street, sharing the moment and just leaving it at that.

Everything was just as how everything has always been. School in, school out. Hanging out with Poos, doing band practices, getting disturbed by Maka – wait, that last part isn't normal and is not something that was supposed to become my daily routine.

But things have cooled off a bit with Maka. Our interactions revolved more around playing pranks on each other and talking shit to each other. Once I decided to treat her as a friend she wasn't as bad as I thought. She was a weird but fun person to hang out with I have to admit.

Then one day,

"Yo Toobs"

"Hey yo"

"You have some time to talk after school?"

"We can talk now"

"Nah, not now"

"Alright man, any time"

"Cool"

School was over and me and Poos walked to a near by park where we chilled out often, sitting on the grass in the sun.

"Weather's starting to get warmer eh?"

"Yeah I like that"

"Your band preparations going alright?"

"Yes we will be recording in about 3 weeks. I'll take a week off school. It's a pretty rare chance"

"I bet. I'll give your music another try after your records come out - even if it's shit"

"Cheers I guess – so what's up?"

"What?"

"You said you want to talk about something"

"Oh yeah, erm, how are things between you and Maka..?"

"Listen dude. I think you also have some misunderstanding…"

"Whatever you say man – you still my brother in law" – thumbs up and a smile – what the fuck dude…

"nothing much. Everything is normal. She screws around, we talk some shit, it is fun at times I have to say"

"Ok… you didn't notice anything different about her lately?"

"No?"

"Does she tell you how her school life's going? I mean although she joined at the beginning of the year she is a transfer student after all, and she's not even from this little town where everyone already knows each other by now"

"You do care about her awfully a lot"

"Yes, she is the closest thing I have to a sister"

"The sister your younger brother could never be…"

"Correct"

"I feel sorry for your little bro.. you got some weird expectations on him"

"Hey, we are talking about Maka"

"Ok"

"So she says nothing about her class? How about her other friends in school? Her school activities? Studies? Test results?"

I realized I don't know anything at all about these things

"Actually I don't know anything man"

"…Are you two even going out..?"

"Look I told you we are not…"

":sigh: ok – you see I'm a little worried about her"

"You always are"

"To be honest she hasn't said anything about any of this to me or to my auntie neither"

"oh"

"Isn't it weird she doesn't talk at all about her school life?"

"Well, but she seems interested enough when talking about music"

"and about you"

"I guess"

"Anyways – the reason why I ask is, auntie got a call from Maka's teacher that she hasn't been coming to school this week"

"Huh? But I saw her around the school the whole week? I mean we even saw her this morning?"

"Yes, it seems she is coming to school but she is not going to her classes"

"That is something yes"

"Could you talk to her about it maybe?"

"Why me again – you are the cousin"

"Maybe she won't tell me because she thinks I may tell her mum – you could probably never talk to her mum after the sexual harassment so…"

"Ah fuck okay man I will do it"

"Cheers Bro, let me know how things go"

"No problem"

The next morning I go to school, I run into Maka around the school gate – she looks normal, dressed in the school uniform, carrying her school bag, all seems legit

"Hey Maka"

"Good morning Toobs"

"How's things going?"

"Great!"

"Really? That's good to hear"

Maka smiles back with no words – okay, gotcha, something is wrong here.

"You know… actually I realize there are many things we don't talk about.. like how our classes are going, about our other friends, what we do during the day, you know these stuff"

"Oh wow, you are saying you want to know more about me?"

"Look don't get … - erm yeah I guess. I mean like, you know my friends, Poos, Nico, other band guys, some stupid dudes that I goof around with from my class, you know that kind of stuff"

"So you want to know about my friends?"

"Yes I guess – if it's okay to ask"

"And how my classes are going?"

"Erm yeah"

"Why the fuck do you care all of sudden?" – Maka looks at me with dead straight eyes.

"Hey you make it sound like I never cared about…"

"Right. You never did. Did Poos ask you to do this?"

"Hey hold it – I didn't mean anything bad"

"Fuck you. I will tell you how things are. There are 26 other students in my class. 12 of them are cunts and 14 of them are fucktards. I have 8 subject teachers and a home room teacher – 2 of them are fucking perverts who became teachers to ogle at young girls and 6 of them are total failures who could not work outside of school environment. There are 50 minutes each class and I hate very fucking minute of it. I fucking hate the restroom stinking of piss, blood and perfume. I can't fucking stand jabbering noises coming out of all the shitheads' gobs in my class during the breaks. I want to fucking kill every single mother fucker that opens the lunch box and bothers me with disgusting smell of their fucking rotten food. I hate every single breathing thing in this fucking place. I wanna fucking kill them all"

"uh… Maka….sor…"

"I like you though. But fuck you! Like you ever fucking cared about my fucking life. After all these fucking months this is the first time you fucking ask me how things are – you never fucking care about anything that is not related to yourself, you are a fucking walking prick. And it only crossed your mind to ask me this because that fucking Poos bastard asked you too. So fu- fu- fu- fuck you!!"

With that Maka ran off, stopped suddenly, turned around to face me and flick the finger, then she ran off again.

I couldn't do anything else for the whole day. I felt so heavy with the guilt.

She was fucking right. I never cared about her. I never bothered to know how her life was outside of our own interactions. What a fucking moron I am. Every single word she said hurt. They hit me hard and hit me as so real. I must do something or I won't be able to fucking forgive myself – no I can't think that way, I must do something to help Maka

During the breaks I walked past Maka's class room a few times and tried to get a peek into the room. Every time I did not get to see her. She probably didn't come into the class. I don't know where she would be hiding. She came to school after all, so I guess she'd be near-by. But how did me and Poos not know this until today? We saw her often enough at the school gate in the morning and run into each other during lunch time – but actually, come to think about it, I never saw Maka coming out from her class room except for that very first meeting, which was pretty early in the year.

After failing to find her again even during the lunch time, I decided to text her – we had to meet.

"Maka – where are you"

"Maka – are you okay?"

"Let's meet up after school"

Too busy fap--- okay maybe not this again. I delete that one mid way.

"Hey I will wait for you by the gate after school – until you come"

Then the school was over, and I waited, and I waited.

About 4 hours after the school was over, I was waiting in front of the closed gate, in dark. Was she not going to turn up at all? Am I being stupid expecting she will come – just because I asked her to? Did I treat her like a dog who will come running to me every time I call? Oh fuck I'm so shit.

:Boom!:

Kwaaaargh! I got hit by something – something crashed onto me

:RRNG RRRNG: sound of a bicycle bell

"I saw this on the way and thought it would be fitting to crash you with this for this reunion"

Fuck this time it hit my ribs, it hurts

"Eh… I'm happy you turned up"

"Why wait for me for so long?"

"Because I wanted to talk to you – and you were not answering any texts"

"Oh so you suddenly want to play nice?"

"Look that's not it, I'm sorry – I was being an ass.."

"Pfft, you've always been and you will always be. Don't worry. I don't mind. I knew this all along"

"… and you've still been saying you.. like me?"

"Yes, you fucking fool"

"Maka – what's wrong with everything?"

"You wanted to say what's wrong with 'me'"

"No I meant what I said – what's wrong with everything, not you"

"You can do sweet talk at times"

"Come on,, seriously – I can tell you meant what you said this morning"

"That won't change anything. Shit heads will always be shit heads, and school will always be useless place teaching useless shits. Neither me nor you can change anybody else"

"I see… so you don't want to make peace with anything?"

"Fuck no"

"Maka, I remember – when I first saw you, you came out of your class room, so you were sitting there, in your class. And when I met you on the street, you recognized I was from same school, you sounded happy to ask about my class, tell me – not everything was so bad from the start right?"

"Fuck you"

"Did anything happen?"

"What do you care"

"Tell me – anybody did bad to you?"

"What the fuck do you care"

"I will fuck them up"

"…uh?"

"Tell me who made you feel so bad. Tell me who made you hate the school. Tell me who pissed you off in your class. I will fuck them up"

"Interesting proposal"

"So… will you spill it out?"

"You will go after them and revenge for me?"

"Yes"

"Why would you go that far?"

"Because when you can't find a way to solve a problem, then brute force is sometimes the answer"

"Heh, I like that"

"So, tell me, I'm all ears"

"Ok – pugh, this will be a long story"

"I waited 4 hours for this. I can wait more"

"Ok – like in the first week or two of the school, I was okay. I had some problems with FUCKING SHITARDS in my previous school but I transferred to this new school. Wasn't lucky enough to get into the same class with Poos (and you) but he was next class and I told myself I will make a new start and forget about those BITCH ASS MOTHERFUCKERS from the previous SHITHOLE" (she's shouting the swearing parts…)

"Everything seemed normal more or less. I didn't make any friends but I was okay with everyone. We chit chat during breaks here and there. Then it all started when you and Poos showed up at my class"

Uh-oh – did we do something wrong?

"oh… sorry… could you explain that part…?"

"You see, I went out and I was surprised to meet you. And I was happy. After you left I ran back to my desk still happy (gees thanks…). Then this BITCH (hey calm down) sitting next to me asks 'hey who was that? He's kinda cute – is he someone you know?' (er… this… is..) so I thought it would be better to make things clear from the start"

:gasp:

"What did you say…?"

"I said 'yo fucking cock tease, don't lay your fucking dirty eyes on my boy or I will rip them out and make you swallow them'"

Oh. My. God.

"So… this started because of…me?"

"Nah, it was my mistake. Later it came to my mind so I asked her which boy she meant, and she said the tall one, so yeah, she was talking about Poos – :whisper: hey, don't ever tell him this, I think I blew his chance of having his first girlfriend, I'll kill you if you tell him (there's only two of us here you don't need to whisper…"

"So people started to get scared of you..? Is that why"

"Not completely. You see, for girls there will always be cliques in classes. When you are bad to some girls, there will be other girls who will like you (huh what the fuck is that). So some BITCHES liked what I did to the other girl so started to befriend me"

"How did that go…?"

"We did the usual girly things, hanging out, eating lunch together, going to restroom together – we even went out for a shopping day one weekend"

"Hey that sounds like a good thing"

"Yeah but things went wrong there"

"How?"

"Just as when we met up, girls were checking out and commenting on each other's clothes. This one SLUT (hey hey) asked me 'how do I look?' and I said…'

"You look shit" – we say this together. I can't avoid doing the face palm.

"Then one thing just led to another like this, and before I know it everyone was against me – so unfair, pfft"

"Ok. Erm… I think I understand the situation a little bit better now…"

"Thank you. I feel much better. So when are you going to beat them up?"

(Man I fucked up this one what the fuck was I thinking)

"Can I join? Or will you do everything for me and I can watch with popcorn?"

(I will get expelled for this… no.. probably go to jail if I did that)

"Are you gonna use any tools? Or bare hands? Fist punching? Slapping?"

(Please stop…)

"Ah, anyways, I will leave that up to you. Surprise me. I can't wait!"

"Er… Maka…"

"This is the first time you do something for me… I feel like my love is being returned in kind"

"Ma…Maka…"

"Shall we fuck?"

"No stop. Whoa. Let me think this through… you see…. An operation of this big scale…. Need planning"

"Oh I see. I will look forward to it but don't make me wait too long!"

"er…"

"Thank you again Toobs – see you tomorrow!"

Then Maka ran back home (although we need to go the same direction), leaving the bicycle behind (which she probably stole… - hm is it okay for me to ride this back home..? gaah what the fuck am I thining)

That night

:RRRRNG:

"Yo Poos its me"

"Whatssup Toobs"

"You know, I had a chat with Maka today"

"oh you did? Hang on, let me get back to my room….. oh ok, you can tell me now"

"erm how do I say this…"

"spit it out man! Is she being bullied? Did anyone do anything bad to her?"

"It seems to be the other way…"

"eh?"

"Maka has been doing what Maka does. Telling people they look shit, smell shit, talk shit – calling people names, verbally abusing other girls to the point they cry… I think everyone in her class thinks SHE is the class bully"

"Oh fuck. You are right. We are talking about Maka… I should have known this…"

"Yes, so I think that's why her class mates started to avoid her, and I think everything just snowballed from there"

"Ok I see – so what do we do now?"

"You gotta help me here"

"Of course I will Toobs! You are doing this for Maka after all! I thank you so much and I will support your plan to help Maka"

"Ok. We need to go beat up all of her classmates – either with some tools or with bare fists, she doesn't mind"

"Ok. Bye"

Duud duuud duud (he hung up)

The next day.

"Hey Poos"

"Huh? What? Me? Who are you?"

"Stop that"

"I feel sick. I think I need to go to infirmary"

"No"

"I havent' done my homework today. I'll go hide under that desk so the teacher won't find me okay?"

"No"

"ah come on Toobs. We can't do this. We can't just go beat up people that Maka bad mouthed"

"Yeah I know. But I promised to Make I will do it"

"Then YOU should be responsible for this stupid 'solution'"

"Look I was just trying to help and I didn't know what was coming"

"You committed yourself blindly to Maka… thank you Toobs, we are family"

"Fuck you"

"See you later – gotta run"

Lunch Time

I can't even open my lunch box. I'm restless. I'm sure Maka will be chasing me from now on to go beat up her classmates. I can't tell her 'oh actually it's your fault after I hear everything'. She can't be reasoned with and… she will feel hurt. Because she believed that I cared now, that I took her side even before hearing the story. If I back away now she will feel betrayed – hey what the fuck do I care, this is crazy – no but I can't be a non-caring asshole again… what to do… what to do…

"Toooooooobo!" Maka barges into our classroom – shit. She hasn't seen me yet, she doesn't know my desk, I'm gonna hide under this

"Toooobsie~, are you here?"

Everyone's staring at her standing in front of the class room

I wave to random dude in the class, mouthing, 'tell her I'm not here' – he gives me a thumbs up and a wink – thanks buddy whose name I won't remember.

"Toobo's not here now. I think maybe he's gone outside"

"Oh… thank you. Sorry for disturbing. Could you please tell him Maka was here looking for him when he's back?"

Suddenly all the eyes of the guys in my class caught fire – MAKA! She is Toobo's fapping queen!

"Wow she is THE Maka!"

"Huh who is Maka?"

"You know.. the one…ffff…"

"Oh…" #whisper whisper#

It was tragic that the guys in my class got to see that stupid message long time ago and built up some weird fantasies about Maka in their collective imagination. Maka's now looking around a bit puzzled, man I gotta stop this

"Hey Maka – I'm back – what are you doing here?"

"Ah there you are now – let's go I can't wait any longer"

#whisper whisper – wow did you hear that, she says she can't wait any longer, we are in the middle of lunch time#

"Huh wait Maka"

"Come on. Let's go do this. Now"

#collective gasp: what the fuck are we witnessing

Then some nerd sitting in the corner that I have never talked to before, quietly lifts his hand and stutters out,

"Can…can I come too?"

#whisper whisper: whoa he's got some balls – is he asking to go and watch? That's bold man

"Huh? You are gonna lend a hand?" Maka's making this worse. OH SHIT.

#Collective madness: HOLY FUCK. She's asking him to 'lend a hand'. This is decadent! She's kinda cute but she doesn't seem to be that kind of a girl, but wow, how open minded is she…

I hard eyeball the nerd to sit down – know your place you fool, stay the fuck out of this

"Ah ok. Well I guess it can be a group thing. We can always use more hands – ok you come with us too" Maka…

#Collective mind blown: "Group thing". "more hands" "come with us"

"waaaaaah I will come too!"

"Me too!"

"I will join!"

"I will lend my hand, my both hands, and my feet! (dude what the fuck)"

"We will all come together!

"This is beautiful… (what the…)"

Maka looks around the class and then looks at me,

"Toobo, you are a fucking hero. You got a whole army with you"

"Yes we are the Toobo Army! We will all come together!" (shut the fuck up you mother fuckers!)

"OK boys! Then we gonna do this! Right now! Let's go!"

#Collective insanity screams: WOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAA!

"But where are we going?" – somebody had to ask.

"Of course – we will do it right in my class. We are gonna show them all"

There is some insane misunderstanding going on here. The look on these guys' faces are creepy as hell.

"Toobo – I trust you. Lead the way"

"er… sure"

So am I actually gonna do this? I'm walking next door to Class A, with Maka walking next to me with her head held up high, and bunch of over excited guys pumping their fists and following behind me. I'm taking a deep breath before I open their class door. How can I do this…. oh? Maybe? It's a big gamble, but there is nothing else to try… puuugh.. ok. I got this.

"I'm going all in"

#Collective gasp: Toobo sounds so perverse.

Baaam!

I slam the door open as loud as I can. I have to make a big scene out of this.

"Yo Class A. Guess who's back"

#Collective confusion: huh? Who is that? Was it… Toobo? Oh isn't he a drummer in a band or something? What?! There is Maka standing next to him. She looks so full of herself today.

"Yes, that's right. Maka is back. With me, and our army"

#Class B spirit screams: Yes! We are here fuckers! Get this man!

#Class A confusion grows : what is going on.. is this a class fight? A group assault? Should we call the teacher?

"Today. I came on behalf of Maka to right the wrong from the past."

#Class B : This must be some kind of a ritual role play they do before the group thing – this is getting serious

"You may think she is the wrong one – but she's an honest spirit who only meant good things"

#Class B : The Maka Goddess worshipping is starting!

"Sometimes she may be harsh, but everything she says, is for your benefit upon reflection"

#Class B : erm… this is dragging on a bit

#Class A rep: What the fuck is this – he came here to tell us it was okay for Maka to say all these nasty things to us? We shouldn't just take this lying down. I should speak up as the class rep

"Hey who are you to say all this! She's been real nasty to us!"

#Class B: Naaaaaaasty!

#Class A : Yes! Go class rep!

"Oh…? Is that so..? Is that why YOU guys tried to be nasty to her too?"

A moment of pause.

"Do you REALLY want to see the REAL nasty?

#Class B: Naaaaasty!

Class A Rep: "ergh…. What are you trying to do – what is the meaning of all this – what if we say we cannot accept this"

"I came here with chance for peace, but…"

"Toobo – we came for the beat down" – Maka cuts in, oh shit, I hope that doesn't screw this up

#Class A's collective fear: Words are not enough for her anymore – she wants real violence!

Hah I smell this – let's try to push it and end it here.

"But if you refuse, we will do as Maka wishes – you see all these guys who came here together, to lend a hand in this – we will all beat it down here!"

#Class A: Shit! This is a threat – it's gonna be a group fight if we refuse

#Class B: This is fucking wild. We are gonna 'beat it down' here?! He means fapping right? Shit, we gonna like… fap it all out here together..? with Maka….?!

"Yeah mother fuckers! We're gonna rain it down on you!" a nameless hero dude from our Class B burst out shouting. Thanks bro. Misunderstanding can be a great thing I realise.

#Class B's over-driven insanity: YEEEAAAAAAHHHH WE GONNA SHOWER IT DOWN HERE!!!!!

#Class A's panic mumbles: This is no good. These fuckers are crazy. We know that Maka bitch is crazy but they are like fanatics. She has freaks backing her up, why would they do this? – actually I heard Toobo was on drugs during his gig a few weeks ago – whoa, is that true? Yeah, I hear he must have been on cocaine or something – shit, that means he can really go out of control – is he on drugs now? Someone saw Maka and Toobo get on a cab together after the gig, and someone was passing them a big wad of cash – no shit, that sounds gangsta – where did they go? To a nearby love hotel – that's from an eye witness – how could they do this so publicly? Didn't most of the guys from Class B go to see the gig as well? Wait, look at those guys – they have crazy eyes right? Yeah, they are creepy. Do you think…. They all went together like this… to the hotel? On drugs? Holy fuck – it all clicks now. That Maka slut – these are her sex slaves, Toobo intoxicate them with drugs and Maka use her body to get them hooked, they cannot get out anymore, they are all in this together.

(To the eyes of anyone in Class A, all the guys that came together with Toobo and Maka, standing behind them, panting and pumping fists in excitement, look just like a group of raging perverts)

"So… what do you say? Class Rep? Will you back down now?"

"Hey, Toobo – I thought we are gonna beat them here!" Maka snaps

Oh we are so close, this is getting so risky, come on please, class A rep, sit down now to concede defeat. Then another hero from Class B screams out something utterly misleading

"Yeah beat them! Spank them monkeys!"

#Class B is still out of its mind: yeaaaaah! Beat them monkeys!

#Class A: They are calling us monkeys now… or wait, do they mean like… wanking? Are they going to have a wank fest in our classroom? Shit, either way this is freaky as hell, we don't want any of this – class rep, let's just give up, this is too crazy for us to handle

"O…Ok… I concede… we will… not be mean to Maka again… (but she was the who was mean to us, this is so unfair it makes me want to cry)"

#Class B guys are now shouting "victory" and making woo woo woo monkey sounds

"Maka – I think this is the end. I hope you can accept and move on from this"

"Well, since you say so, and all of you guys went through all this trouble for me… I will accept it as it is now"

"Thank you Maka. Thank you Class A. We will leave you alone now – let's go guys"

#Class B: huh? What? We are going back out? What's happening? Is this the end? Where's our share?

(Toobo: hush, come on guys, let's get out of here first, leave first and ask questions later)

"Ok let's go out then guys" – Maka smiles to the boys

#Class B: Ah – she's not the prettiest girl in the school, but to be so dirty and nasty with such a cute face… this is special. That damn Toobo, she said she's been too busy fapping everyday 'Thanks to him' – what has he got?

Pugh. It's over

"Thanks guys for helping out with this. You all showed what great friends you are, as class mates, and to Maka"

Maka smiles… er.. .she looks a bit shy? I guess she hasn't had this popular admiration before.

"er….. can I… can I shake your hand please… before we finish…?" – the nerd who started it all, by raising his hand to 'come along' extends his hand towards Maka – man this creep

"Of course! Thank you for all this!" Maka smiles whole heartedly and shakes his hand, cupping them with her both hands. The nerd immediately blushes and pull away slowly…

"Tha…Thank you… I will…. F..fii….finish myself…" then he turns away heading to the direction of the restroom?!

"Please shake my hand too"

"Me too"

"For me please shake the left hand" – oh what the fuck?! And why are you guys all running to the restroom after shaking hands with Maka?!

But Maka smiles to every single one of them, gives them a warm handshake. She looks happy.

Fuck I feel like I've done something grossly wrong.

"Toobo"

"huh?"

"Thank you"

"er… er yeah… don't mention it"

"Nobody has ever done so much for me before…"

"Ah, you just haven't met the right man haha. Ha.. ha…."

"Now I have" – grgh. I said it wrong.

"But you know… I don't think I can be friends with them again after all this though.. I'm sorry because you put so much effort to make things good again for me… do you think.., maybe it's my problem after all? Was I wrong to be that way to them..?"

(Yes you were Maka, but I won't say that now)

"Shhhh. Be quiet and listen"

I had prepared for this before actually. I had no idea I will use it today though, but fuck it, anyways.

:plug:

In my life

Why do I smile

To the people that I much rather kick in the eye

She breaks out a short giggle as she hears those words – yes that's right. You don't have to be friends with everyone. Just kick them in the eye sometimes