4 The Grove

After an interesting breakfast, I decided to blow off some steam myself by taking a walk through the grove near our home. It wasn't much, but it was quiet. I needed this time to myself to contemplate what I was to do about my growing affections for Killian. I had been told by some clanswomen back home that once a woman had laid with a man her affections for him begin to grow. She feels an intense ownership and connection to him. This previous conversation had left me worried, but I had known that I was the controller of my emotions, and no man was going to make them betray me. How wrong was I?

Killian on the other hand seemed unaffected by our interaction. As though he had experienced being with a woman in that way many times before. He was my first and as law would have it, my last. Our clan forbade a woman from taking another man if the marriage did not last. She would become unwanted and tainted. No man would want her as she would be forced to live in solitude for the rest of her life. A man however could take any many wives as he wanted, even have mistresses during his marriage if he so choose. However unfair it was, it was our custom and our law. Even being the clan leader's daughter didn't make me an exception.

Sitting under a large oak tree I sought after the shade it created from the summer heat. It was nearing high noon, and I was paler than the shell of an egg. I could feel my skin burning from the suns rays and my skin become moist from perspiration. Closing my eyes and embracing the shelter of the long extending arms of the tree I rested and thought.

Killian was as any suitor, except instead of wanting my hand in marriage he detested the idea. Hell even I do. But last night's events kept running through my head, and I couldn't distinguish if I felt affection for this man or lust. I didn't even know the difference. This was the first time I had ever felt this way for anyone. Let alone someone as repulsed by me as Killian Altair.

At some point I felt my eyes become heavy as sleep took over. I began to dream.

"Do you think she knows Killian?"

"How could she? Your sister is bright, but she's not a mind reader."

It was Killian and Doireann. But who was "she"? Did they mean me?

"Killian, it would tear her apart to discover that her life was nothing more than another one of our father's schemes," Doireann said. Her voice sounding frantic.

"That is why we mustn't let her discover this. Aine was born to be my wife and though I may not love her, I will protect her. Your father gave a large sum to our clan to ensure this marriage took place. He sacrificed a lot," Killian replied. I had never heard him speak of anyone in this manner. He sounded genuine and thoughtful. Almost as though he truly did care.

"I just don't want her to get hurt. After last night, I saw the way she looked at you this morning. Don't let her fall in love with you only to get her heart broken," at this, Doireann's voice broke and it sounded as though she was crying.

Killian sighed, I could hear his arms moving, sounding as though he was wrapping them around her. Then he spoke, "I cannot guarantee that your sister will not fall in love with me. I will try my best to keep her at arms length."

Doireann sniffled then said, "She cannot know the truth. She cannot find out who she really is! Promise me you will keep this a secret, my father trusts you and so do I!"

"I promise."

Suddenly loud footsteps neared and the two stubbled away from one another. The voice that followed sounded familiar.

"My Lord. Lady Aine said you were angry with her this morning and I figured I would find you out here after I checked with my men. Oh Lady Doireann I did not see you there."

The voice belonged to Sir Anlon.

"Anlon, I was just speaking with Lady Doireann about my wife. Trying to get insight on how to woo her after I lost my temper. She has been most helpful," I could hear Killian stepping up on his horse.

"Fairwell m'lady. I will be sure to keep your words in mind. I hope we can have other discussions as helpful as this one."

Doireann sighed, "As do I Lord Killian."

I then heard horse hooves beating into the ground through the distance. Doireann began walking away but before she left she spoke to herself, "Please Lord, protect my sister. Help guide Killian into becoming her devoted and loving husband. Help him to keep Aine safe and guarded from those who wish her ill-will. Otherwise, I fear I may lose my most treasured friend and sister."

Then she left.

A few hours later I awoke with the sun setting. I had slept so long the day was withering away. I stood and thought to myself, "what a strange dream".

As I returned home I found Killian sitting in his study reading over military tactics and old scriptures. He glanced up at me as I walked past. I figured he needed this time to focus and my presence wasn't going to help.

I heard him lowly clear his throat and say, "Aine, please come here."

Taking in a deep breath, I turned around and entered the study. The room was dim. Only being lit by the fireplace and two candles placed on his desk. He was handsome. Even more so with the flames lights flickering off of his face.

He never looked up at me, but spoke, "I am sorry. For my behavior this morning."

"I should be the one apologizing. I never should have said such harsh and cruel things. It wasn't the time nor my place to speak so illy of you."

At this Killian looked up and for the first time a smile so true appeared on his face, "Never in my life did I think you would be the one to apologize to me."

"Perhaps it is time I learn my place Lord Killian," I replied.

Killian appeared hurt by my words for a short second before recovering and shaking his head in agreement.

"Is that all my lord?" I asked.

Raising a brow, Killian shook his head yes once more. Then suddenly remembered something and said, "Wait. There is one more thing. Where were you this afternoon? When I returned no one knew where you had gone off to."

"I went out to the grove behind the manor. I fell asleep under an oak tree and just now awoke. Is there a problem?" I asked.

"No problem. Did you see anyone or hear anyone else while you were out there?" He replied.

Thinking I said, "No. But I did have a very peculiar dream. With you and Doireann. I can't recall what it was about, but you were talking about me I think," I said. Knowing my dream sounded asinine.

Killian looked alarmed, but composed himself immediately. "Do you remember anything specific from this dream?"

"Why are you so curious about my dreams? They are only dreams. They don't mean anything. Now if that is all, I am rather tired and would like to get some rest."

Killian looked like he wanted to continue questioning. But inwardly decided against it. He raised his hand and waved me off. Just as I got to the door however, he seemed to remember something and said, "Oh, my chambers are being repaired as there was a water leak after our last storm. I will be staying with you in your chambers until the repairs are complete. I hope you do not mind the intrusion."

Feeling overwhelmed I only shook my head in agreement. Then said, "Why would I mind? You are my husband after all, it is your right to enter my chambers as you please."

Killian nodded then returned his attention to his work once and for all.

I quickly left the room and raced for my chambers. Another night sleeping next to Killian Altair. My husband. My doom.