Chapter 1: Prolog

My name is Gao ChanYi , which means "generous". This name is a legacy from my mum who died when i was five years old due to an accident. My father left me a week after my mother's death, and until now I haven't heard from him at all.

I once tried to find out his whereabouts ... asked peopke who knew my father. However, with the vague information i got, never came to fritition. I don't know why he left me at that age when i still needed him by my side. Maybe i't because of a woman? Or he was frustrated by losing my mother? I don't know for sure.

With my current situation, i was raised by grandmother, tho was in Tiajin , a city located in the northeastern plains of Huebai. It's the person who played three roles for me at once: grandmother, mother and father, all this for 17 years. She gave me love as a mother ; advise as a grandmother ; and education as a father.

She's the only family i have. During my time in Tianjin , I had a playmate named Wu XiuHuan. We are quite close even though he is 2 years older than me. However, our friendship did not last long, until he and his family moved to another city that i didn't know. I was quite sad at the time becaus esh ewas my only friend at the time.

After i turned 19, I said goodbye to continue my studies at a technical university in Shanghai, and with a heavy heart, I had to leave it alone.

However I always visited my hometown in winter because I wasn't that busy. I studied Technique of Graphic Design in Shangai, which really keeps me busy. Besides that, I also have a part time job as a freelancer to translate videos from english to Chines, and that is my main reason for rarely visiting it.

Early fall in september, right into my third year of university. When I was 21 y/o, I received the news that the only family I had in my life was gone forever, and it made me so frustrated that I wanted to end my life.

I remembered the advice sh ealways gave my, that i shouldn't give uo easily on life. I used to think of it as just the chatter of an elderly person and, during the 10 years since disappearance, I realized that babbling was able to make me stand uo and live my live, until i found someone who became my new family. Liu DongYue, the name of a man who is both a lover and the only one I want as my family. He is 32 y/o now, just like me.

We've been in a relationship for about 9 years. He confessed his feelings when we were in our forth year of university. I didn't get along well with him when he said he liked me. We took the same study but we didn't met often because we were in differnt classes most of the time. DongYue saw me for the first time at a cafe, but I never noticed him until he confessed his feelings to me.

At first I didn't really care about it because I didn't want to show that I was gay. However, as if he realized it or it was me who had been melted by him, he oculd make me fall in love with him. After graduating from univesity, we decided to work for different companies. Why? I asked for it.

I'm afraid that one day our forbidden relationship will have an impact in the future. Now DongYue is a president at a well-known company, and I am a designer at a different place. Because of our busy schedules, we decided to live in the same apartment. Of course, to maintain our relationship too. We went through a lot of things together to become what we are now.

We left the harshness of life in the world of work and enjoyed the results as they are. Still, unfortunately, the mapis did not aplly to our relationship. I have known DongYue for about 9 years and I know how he acts. I can confirm DongYue is not a DongYue like when we were at the lowest point.

Either because of work or other causes. I don't care because I love so much. Still, I also know that there will be times when I will have to leave. DongYue, I love you. Will you continue to accompany me? I need you right now, DongYue...