2 Deputy Dumbass

I was listening to the radio while I ate my midday lunch. I had already done my training session with the machetes, and they felt every bit as natural as they always do. Dagger, machete, and staff are probably my most advanced and also favorite weapons. Daggers because I get to live up to my ninja attire and be sneaky and take people out up close, though I haven't actually killed anybody yet.

Just sever a tendon here or there to disable them until the cops come. Those grow back right? Eh, either way not my problem, they were bad guys anyways. Machete is just a longer dagger in my opinion, not too much longer that it would be a hinderance when in close quarters. But long enough to generate some extra force behind the swing when I bring it down.

Lastly the staff is just fun, I get to be my own Donatello. I even got one custom made to be like Daredevil's that can split apart into 2 pieces. Definitely fun getting to pretend to be some of my favorite fictional characters. Maybe I'll wrap a braided rope around my knuckles like Daredevil did. Hmm something to consider for the future.

That's when the radio, that also doubles as a police scanner, went off.

"All available units, high speed pursuit in progress. Linden County units request local assistance. Highway 18 Eastbound GTA, ADW, 2-17, 2-4-3. Advise extreme caution."

"Damn, that sounds awesome!" I say out loud as I begin to jump and get ready. East down highway 18 from Linden will lead them by my house, it's just a 5 minute jog through the woods! I have to go see this! I know GTA means Grand Theft Auto, but I have no clue about the other things she said. Ugh, I guess I really do need to finish studying that police radio code book.

Grabbing the portable handheld radio off the stand, and now in my vigilante attire, I take off at a sprint through the woods.

"Suspects are two male caucasians. Be advised they have fired upon police officers. One Linden County officer is wounded." The radio rings out as I'm running toward the highway.

Wow! This just keeps getting better, these are definitely the kind of people I need to see. A couple minutes later I hear the sirens of a cop car, and as I peek through some bushes I see 2 cops laying a spike track down across the road. I was currently across the road from another cop car that had 2 people in it, and when the spike laying team finished they reversed back into a similar position.

With that they all got out of the car and I could finally tell who they were. Having lived in King's County all my life I knew pretty much everyone, especially cops due to my vigilante occupation. Rick Grimes hopped out of the driver seat of the left car with his signature Colt Python, a mean looking revolver but loud as all hell.

Shane Walsh, a muscle head of a guy, but damn if he wasn't good at his job. I have no personal grievances with the man and even have had some interactions with him during my early vigilante days when I didn't quite finish off the thugs before he arrived. He seemed to think like me in that the bad guys got what they deserved, and he said as long as I stay on good guy side he wouldn't come after me. Though if it came down to it he wouldn't be too much of a problem to take down, he may be stronger than me but that's not always everything.

Then there's Leon Basset, not the brightest bulb in the pack that's for sure. Hell I don't even think he is a bulb, I don't even know how this guy passed the tests to become a police officer. He's not a bad guy, just not cut out for the job, I mean I've even had to save him a couple times when someone he was trying to arrest started beating him up.

"Maybe we'll get on one of them video shows, you know? Like 'World's Craziest Police Chases'. What do you think?" My sharp hearing allowed for me to hear them talking amongst themselves by the car and I had to hold back to keep from laughing at this idiot.

The other guy is Lambert Kendall and the lone black guy in the King's County police force, originally his dad and uncle served as well but they retired just a few years back. Marshall Kendal, his dad, was actually the one that came to my house to inform me my parents had died. So I looked out for Lambert whenever I knew we were out and about at the same time. This is southern Georgia after all and as stupid as I find it, racism still lives and breathes down here.

They each took up positions using the police cars as cover and that's when the sound of faint sirens approaching could be heard. Jesus, Leon didn't even have a round in or his safety off they are getting ready for armed suspects who have already been confirmed to have wounded another officer. How do these guys get hired? I mean I know it's King's County, but damn!

The silver car pops up over the small hill and hits the spike trap at full speed sending it into a series of flips. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5…. Oh almost 6, but they stopped upside down before they could get to 6. Damn, no way they aren't all shaken up after that, this was a waste. Oh shit never mind, one just got out the car and started firing.

I was wrong this is awesome! I mean every single one of these guys are terrible shots though, I could have hit the guy in the head from this distance. Are they just nervous or something? Oh! Rick got tagged, but I think I saw it hit his vest. Second guy popped out with a shot gun, but he got dropped quickly. Wait I think I see something else moving by the car, oh shit it's a 3rd guy. Sorry Rick, but you've been dubbed Deputy Dumbass for walking out in the open in easy firing range for people known to have hit another cop.

They don't seem to notice the 3rd guy in time and Rick catches another bullet, this one missing the vest and hiring nothing but flesh. Hit him with one fucking shot, now that's how you shoot your gun! They could learn a thing or 2 from that guy. Eh well, I guess not anymore, looks like he just caught a shotgun blast to the chest. Damn that's gotta hurt. But how unlucky do you gotta be to be the only guy in a firefight to catch a bullet, let alone 2 Rick truly is unlucky haha. This is what happens when people don't report properly, had they know there were 3 people in the car this wouldn't have happened.

Ah well it was fun to watch either way, might as well head back home before the ambulances arrive.




[One month later]

It's been a little over a month since I saw that car chase that ended with Deputy Dumbass getting shot, I had followed it up to learn that he was alive but was in a coma. But that's not really my biggest problem at the moment, no currently the dead have decided to no longer stay dead. Yup you heard me right, these dead fuckers are roaming around chomping down on people and then turning them as well.

I've just been cooped up in my house, with my generator but even that has just went out. Which means I'll have to do my own looting and I find a new place to crash. The hospital! A military base had been set up there during the beginning, but last I heard over the radio they had gotten over run. It would be perfect for looting, MREs, medicines, guns, gas. Maybe they even have a tank! Eh I don't really know how to drive a tank though.

Suiting up in my vigilante gear, I've got a machete strapped horizontally across my lower back, a dagger on my left hip and my silenced m9 in a holster on my right thigh. A rucksack that held by staff that was currently separated into 2 pieces so as to not get in the way of my mobility. Had my usual throwing knife vest on as well but the top 5 slots of the 10 were holding extra mags if ammo instead of the throwing knives.

I've got really good accuracy, but you have to throw with a ridiculous amount of force to pierce through a skull, and even I would have a tough time hitting them through the eye socket every time. Which lead me to carrying more ammo instead of my knives, though I'm trying to ration bullets as well.

I hop into my truck and make the 20 minute drive into town towards the hospital. However I passed the library and realized I probably needed to grab a book on what the different medicines do. I had a cursory knowledge, enough to be a field/battle medic, but I needed more than that. Something that also surprised me is that no one was looting the library, so I had been taking a several loads of books at a time back to my house. I mean these things are pretty damn useful even if they don't have any educational value.

Get bored? Read a book. Need a fire but don't have any wood? Burn some old magazine or a multiple of a book. Newspapers also! I've been gathering them for a future fire source as well. Anyways I found the book I was looking for and grabbed some 20 other medical books and tossed them into my passenger seat and made my way on to the hospital. Thankfully one of the books was practically a glossary of all the different medicines used in the medical field.

(AN: I have no real knowledge of medicines and the like so don't judge to hard if I don't list every single medication he grabbed.)

I was about to turn down the road towards the hospital when I saw the police department. Of course! How could I be so stupid, like the hospital it should be on at least it's own gas and water line, meaning it should have running water. I decide to scope the place out for my temporary home and pull in this gated spot on the side. This gate fenced in the entire back of the police department, so I quickly shut it and made sure no dead guy could push it open before I began clearing the perimeter.

Sadly there were only a couple dead guys roaming inside the fence, but oh well surely I'll run into more at the hospital later. Even the inside of the police department was completely empty of dead people. However what it lacked in things for me to kill, it made up with things I could use to kill. Guns, rifles, pistols, shotguns and lots and lots of ammo.

I even headed to their evidence lock up and found some interesting things. It was mostly drugs, but some of them were prescription pain killers that could come in handy. I may or may not have grabbed several pounds, yes I said pounds of weed that they had locked up in there. I didn't grab any of the hardcore drugs because that wasn't for me but pretty much everything else went into my bag. As well as all the cash they kept, which is another great fuel for a fire because what are we going to use cash for during the zombie apocalypse.

With everything cleared and deemed safe by me I began to barricade the lone front door with all kinds of desks and chairs that I wouldn't be needing. I made my room in the chief's office with his desk blocking that door and blinds drawn closed. With my second base readied I made my way back out and continued to my original target, the hospital.

I hadn't been to the Harrison Memorial hospital since the outbreak, but I can't say I was expecting what I ended up seeing. Bodies in body bags, some covered with tarp and some not covered at all lined the parking lot of the hospital. The smell was absolutely horrendous as well, but thankfully my face covering came with a pouch that I could put smell goods in to fight the stench.

What really caught my eyes though were the humvees. 8 in total I could see and they all looked to be in working condition, I was like a kid in a candy shop. I parked my truck and saw the cases of ammo, weapons and MREs that got left behind I just kept getting more excited. Looking in one of the humvees I found it's key hidden in the driver side visor. With a twist of the key the Humvee roared to life and i drummed my hands on the steering wheel in excitement.

I turned it back off and returned to my scavenging, after I attached the trailer that was hooked to my truck on to the humvee. It was a fairly big trailer being 20foot long, and as wide as the humvee. Like the vulture I was I began taking everything off every other humvee. I took the gas tanks that were strapped to their sides and loaded them on my trailer. The other tires from the other humvees were taken off the back, where the spare was, and also I got my tire iron from my tool box and began relieving the other 7 humvees of their tires.

Everything inside my truck was transferred to the humvee, as well as the batteries of both my truck and the other humvees. I would have to look up how to store those, so they wouldn't go bad. I loaded a few barrels of what seemed to be oil onto my trailer as well. Then I began dismantling the machine gun that was inside the helicopter and loaded it in the back of my new humvee. Now came all the guns and ammunition. There were nearly a hundred crates that held multiple ARs and pistols, even a box of unopened suppressors for them as well.

All of this got loaded on to my trailer and I was beginning to run out of room and daylight. Even though I had left my home right as the sun was rising, the stops at the police station and the library had cut into my time. Finally I made my way to the tents that held crates upon crates of MREs. I'm talking literal thousands of MREs. I would have never been able to haul all of this stuff with my truck, and I was beginning to wonder if the humvee could as well.

The last crate of MREs loaded, some stacked on top of each other, to eek out just about 4 feet of room left on the trailer. I was thankfully for my caution to bring an absurd amount of ratchet straps.

(AN: Thing used to keep loads in trailers and trucks from moving or falling)

Lastly it was time to use the remaining time to loot the hospital and boy was it worth it. There were zombies everywhere! I felt like the main character in all those comics and books I read, moving down one hallway to the next just taking down zombie after zombie. I had killed off maybe 30 zombies when I finally made it to their supply room. It was locked, but thankfully they hadn't upgraded to the electric locks and I was able quickly pick it and be graced by the view of a fully stocked medical supply room.

I began filling up the military bags I found with all the different medicines, some were in glass bottles and I was thankful for my foresight to bring several stacks of newspapers with me. They wouldn't be the best, but they should do a good enough job of protecting the containers from breaking unless I just go throwing the bags around. I filled up 5 different bags to the brim with various medicines and drugs, but I made sure to target pain killers, anesthesia, and anything ending in -cillin. It didn't matter much though as I was able to go bag up everything.

Loading the last bag of medical supplies that included medical tools such as gloves, sutures, needles and the like as well I headed back in for the cafeteria. Of course I had thousands of individual MRE packages, but I was hoping to find some bottled water. And boy did I find it, I found cases upon cases of bottled water, huge cans of coffee, tea, powdered milk, powdered eggs, canned vegetables and fruit, oatmeal, grits.

It seemed the freezer hadn't been out for too long either as everything in there was still frozen. All different kind of meats were in there, so much that I wouldn't be able to fit it all on the remaining space on my humvee and trailer. So I grabbed what I could and finished loading it all on to the trailer, and headed back to my home. With all this gas and oil I had I could disconnect the power from everything else and just run my freezer area for a long time.

Not to mention I didn't want to hold on to all of this stuff in a place like the police station. I'm sure eventually more scavengers will come along and think that it's the perfect place to loot, so I'm taking this all back to my basement in my home and tomorrow I'll come back grab the rest of the frozen goods and load my truck up on the trailer so I can haul it back, and get the last of my stuff I left in the police station.

(AN: Don't worry he's not going to pointlessly live out his days in his house, it's just going to be a food bank and weapon bank of sorts for him. I'm sorry these first 2 chapters have basically been buildups, but we will be getting into character interactions in the next chapter! I look forward to writing more of Will's journey because this is just the set up for him. The real part of the story will start with actual interactions with the characters you know and love. You will get to see Will's thoughts on them and all that good stuff. Just hold on for one more chapter if you've been considering dropping it.)

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