1 Story

This was not an easy job. As a detective, my time was always directed toward progressing through a case. I was always out looking for new leads, talking to witnesses, and writing reports. Even when I returned home, my spare time was still filled with thoughts of work.

Throughout my years in this department, I had to go undercover more than a handful of times. I had to learn how to blend into my environment, and how to interact with a variety of people. Being a woman didn't make things any easier. The longer I stayed in this profession, the more things I was exposed to.

I've seen gruesome crime scenes, worse than the things you see in movies. There have been moments where we didn't make it in time. The amount of physical altercations that I've witnessed is also quite unsettling. A few people who I used to call friends in this line of work are no longer with us as a result of these situations. Shootouts, knife fights, or suicide are all ways that I've seen my friends go.

I do this to protect people, but the failures weigh heavier than my successes. All of those nights dedicated to finding information and connecting pieces all lead to nothing.

I try to convince myself that I had become desensitized to the things that happen in this field, but every failure brings these feelings of guilt back. No matter how much effort I put in, we were always one step behind.

As I walk back to my house, I hang my head down in despair. I can't shake these feelings. And yet every day I get up and return to that life. I see the light slipping further and further away each day. I feel the darkness consuming my heart filled with sorrow.

This is the path that I've chosen. I must continue to push through it and help as many people as possible.

I look over at my wall and see the picture of my little sister and I from years ago. She would later go missing and never be found. That is what motivates me to keep pushing forward out of this darkness. I won't stop until I find the truth.

I will use everything I've learned to blend in and survive this game.

I will save you.