Encounters with a monkey

He didn't look like much, medium height bordering on short, reasonable muscle definition, his iconic scar located under the eye, messy black hair stuffed under his iconic straw hat (and yes I made sure to specify straw hat, anything else would be a disservice), His clothes were a red shirt(I think it's a shirt) blue shorts with a white cut off, and as always, straw sandals.(are they the same straw sandals throughout the series... cause they'd get broken right... but they always stayed in one piece during fights right so does that mean that he just has like a closet full of them somewhe... is that a hand?) I confirmed the hand waving infront face, which was weird cause why's there a hand... 'shit, did I zone out'.

Anyway, lets pay attention to the rubber badass currently standing in front of us, okay. I held up a hand, to let him know I'd noticed, and spoke "sorry bout that, zoned out, what's up?" cause I can't exactly tell him I know him cause that'll lead to HOW I know, which'll lead to something like 'you're luffy right?, can I join you're crew?. Oh and by the way, I know your name cause I came from another world and in my world you're a manga character' that's way too... actually... huh, it is luffy we're talking about here, if anyone would believe me, but just as I went to voice my, what I'm sure would be considered at best, insane, thought. I got beat to the punch.

"well I was asking why you were on my ship" he looked at me, and I had the strangest feeling that for someone reason, if I tried lying, he'd be able to tell, and then he gave me this look and my thoughts nearly came rushing out (it was close man) 'why I'm here, I guess in general that I'm here mainly cause I died, and then I got sent here by this god who screwed up, atleast I think he's a god, not sure, and accidentally killed me, at which point I broke down, begged to go home, got rejected, told I could never go home, got asked what I wanted, got a talking baby tiger, who has wings now, that's cool, I got wings too which wasn't as cool, not because of the fact that I have them but more because of how I found out about them...' and then the hand was back, guess I zoned out again.

"Sorry 'bout that again, and to answer your question" and I decided to be honest with him "I'm not completely sure" he looked confused at that and so I explained "well when I woke up today (in this world), I realised that I wasn't where I should be (the ground), and was confused about how I got here (still being honest, I was confused. about how the portal that got me here worked), and so I headed for the closest thing that looked like it would have people (technically true, I did head for the ship, which technically IS, the closest thing that would have people), aka your ship (nailed it)" I smiled at that, cause i always found it fun to twist words so that the truth said something else, until I saw his smile drop, (at which point i proceeded to freeze) "how'd you do that, you lied but you also didn't" and then he looked like he was trying to figure it out, and at that I panicked and said the first thing that came to mind (how I would come to regret these words) "I wanna join your crew" and then it was his turn to freeze, and then he was smiling again.

That helped calm me down cause, 'he's smiling, that's good' and that was when I realised that I'd just come stupid close to blowing my cover, twice (maybe three times), in all of half a minute, I resolved to be more careful and went back to luffy. And then I was grinning back, cause damn if his smile wasn't infectious, (and then he was saying the words that I'd hoped for) "sure" (well word, but I digress). With that bomb averted I finally took the chance to look at the rest of the crew, there was usopp who was best described as Mousey (short/tall [I don't know everybody seems tall to me here], scrawny guy, with overalls, a big nose and a Bigger grin), nami seemed confident (tall, orange hair, Stacked, wearing a white shirt and matching skirt), zoro was a badass, no other way to put it (black trousers To go with his combat boots, also black, a white shirt. and here was the important bit, three swords hung round his waist. two on the right one on the left) I looked round for the rest of the crew, and then I realised that, 'idiot, they're not here, wait so next ups sanji right, that'll be fun, wonder if maybe I can swing ghin, and I wonder if there's anyone else who's worth, maybe Zeff, but that's pretty unlikely, who else was ther...' .

And yep that's it hand, it's back (this better not become a thing). Once luffy was sure he had my attention again he started speaking again "if you don't mind me asking why" he looked at me and I was pretty sure where he was going, so I nodded to say that I was okay with the question "why do want to join my crew" and then started looking wary "and how'd you know we were a crew in the first place" and that had me panicking again. Before I could say my genius reason (read: panicked excuse), Nami was pointing at the flag and looking at luffy like he was an idiot "maybe the pirate flag clued him in on it genius" and I was smiling again, cause that makes sense, lets' go with that "what she said" and she looked smug and luffy was giving me a look, then (I think he realised that I didn't have any bad intentions) he dropped the wariness and smiled at me again and then he was welcoming me aboard and asking me about "is that cat on your shoulder yours also it has wings, that's pretty cool" and before I could answer for him, Damon was responding, angryily (and angry Baby tiger is scary) "I. AM. A. TIGER. YOU SIMPLETON. ATLEAST TRY AND GET IT RIGHT YOU RUBBER BASTARD" and he lowered his voice from angry hiss to annoyed growl "and for your information, I'm not anyone's anything" he glanced at me "okay maybe I'm his friend at anything, but no, no one gets to own me bastard" and 'aww swearing just like me', then I wondered if the swearing was my fault, easiest answer I ever got (it was the most definite probably I ever got. And the only reason it wasn't definite instead of probably, was cause I couldn't say with certainty that wish-granting fuckery didn't cause it. Ok technically it did, but what's that got to do with anything) and then noticed that was a couple different reactions to Damon's little outburst, namely surprise, that was zoro. panic, which was... actually I'll give you 2 guesses and the first 2 don't count. It was Usopp, because of course it was usopp, no suprises there. and then I was panicking cause I could see what namis' thoughts were practically screaming out 'I wonder what I could get for a talking tiger' and then she noticed his wings and... nope I'm cutting this off right now.

"you are not selling my best-friend," and she tried to look innocent at that "and don't even try to deny it, your eyes are literal belli signs" and that managed to make her look sheepish, which was good, cause I was not letting that thought gain traction. and then there was luffys' response which was impressive in its right, meaning that the main thing he seemed to get from this was "hey!, I am not!" Huh, he's sees a tiger with wings talk, and his take away is that it insulted him. 'That takes a special kinda stupid, or maybe not, or not stupid, shit, is luffy an idiot or not, oh god, this is making my head hurt'. I ended that thought before my head exploded with the sheer confusion that was the defining luffys intelligence and settled for using my phone call "is he an idiot or something" I asked the crew, to whit, I got various facial expressions, ranging from resigned to annoyance "yep" somehow they managed to time it perfectly so that they spoke together, then I asked something else that I felt like I was going to regret "and he's the captain, right?" I saw more than a little dread on there faces at that question, and Shit, it suddenly hit me that I just signed on with a idiot for a captain.

then I had a thought that was worrying (read: terrifying), and that I was pretty sure I already knew the answer to, but I asked anyway just to try it check if maybe, just maybe i was wrong (I will admit that there was more that a little terror in my voice) "and just for curiositys sake, how many of you, besides me, signed up willingly?" and then they went pale at the realisation, that none, none of them signed up willingly, they were all pestered in someone way until he got them, I turned to zoro (poor bastard) "how'd he get you?" I questioned "he 'traded' it for getting me my swords" he responded, and then he went paler at the answer "what about you" I turned to usopp, who was shaking like a leaf "demanded I be his sniper, wouldn't leave me alone till I said yes" and damn now he looked down right anemic "and you?" I asked Nami, which had her looking confused "I'm not even sure if I did sign up" and that confirmation plus my knowledge of his other crewmates made me go very pale as I realised that... well... 'shit, i fucked up man, so fucking bad' and then luffy was trying to cheer me up "hey it's okay, it's not like they said no" and then there was a staff, a sword pommel, and I assume a lead ball, hitting him. All as his 'crew' screeched in perfect unison "WE ALL SAID NO, YOU JUST WOULDN'T ACCEPT IT" and I sunk to the floor as it became clear, just what I'd gotten myself into, 'I take it back, I don't wanna join his crew, take me somewhere else, anywhere, please karma guy, I'm beg-ging h-ere, P-LEA-SE', (I think there was some sobbing in there), (and then I had hope), cause hey, a note, I was surprised that I actually got a response (but higherbeings are bullshit, so whatever), I grabbed the note floating in the air and folded it open (and then that hope proceed to board a plane, once I'd got past the first line the engine stalled, the second line, it was burning. the third line we were pointed in a very downward direction. By the fourth and final line, the plane had crashed, granting my hope a violent and fiery death. There were no survivors.)

"That's not how it works,

you know how this works right?,

you made your choice,

now deal with it.

.

With love

From Karma guy

Ps. I haven't laughed this hard in a good while, thanks for that"

(That was when my resolution to find a way to hurt that bastard went to number 2. on my to do list. Right under number 1. Find a way out of this mess)