12 Shizuka

My name is Shizuka 30 years old

right now I'm heading to Kei-san apartment while carrying groceries, to make breakfast for Kei-san.

me? What do you mean? my relationship with Kei-san?

you can say i'm mommy sugar Kei-san. its a joking~

no, I'm a former kei middle school teacher.

but I worked as a teacher not long, because the incident that happened to my husband 6 years ago ...

my husband died because an accident.

it was a day where I was almost into a pit abyss depression and probably wouldn't come back ... if there wasn't him there.

at that time, I was pregnant with my daughter whose name is Moeka, after hearing that my husband died, I was very depressed.

I shut myself up, even drunk non-stop...

I quit my job being a teacher ...

I don't know what to do without my husband...we just got married ... and he...

because I was so stressed out, I wanted to forget this depression, so I go to the place that can be vent my stress and take drugs that could relieve my stress for a while. (drugs & prostitution)

but, when I will go into that place ... a big warm hand holds my hand from behind...

when I look who holds me...

I am surprised...

"sensei? This is a bad place...why does Sensei want to enter a place like this...?"

I can't say anything ... silent ... i looking down

"Sensei, this is not a good place to vent. come with me if Sensei wants to vent your stress at will!"

he smiled and pulled me, he took me to a quiet place and there were no people at all...

then he spoke.

"Shizuka sensei ... is losing your husband painful?"

when he asked about my husband, I looked at him.

I'm angry ... by yelling at him I said

"of course it hurts! you will not understand my feelings! you-"

"Painful isn't it? then why would Shizuka sensei do that?"

"What do you mean?"

"Sensei ... have you ever seen around you, people close to you, even your parents?"

with a sad expression he spoke again.

[Sensei's close friends will be sad when they see Sensei like this. Sensei's parents will blame themselves because they don't know and don't stop sensei if Sensei goes to the dark side! and even me!]

[Sensei is just a selfish person, so she won't know the pain of others!]

what is this kid saying! you! who don't understand my feelings! you are the selfish here! I held back my anger not to lose control to hit this kid...

[Your husband even be angry and sad to see you like this!]

after he said that, I couldn't hold back my emotions and immediately pushed him to the ground

"Don't you ever said that!"

I hit his face, I don't care anymore, even if I'm go to jail later.. I don't care ...

"what do you know from me! I love him so much ... I really love him so much ... then why ...he just died like that..."

my pent-up emotions overflowed...

==

I stopped beating him ... and rethinking what I've been doing all this time...

if my husband sees me like this ...

and right now I'm pregnant with his child ...

what did i do all this time ...?

my best friend must be worried about me... and mom and dad...

what the hell i'm doing...?

==

"How is it Shizuka Sensei? Is really good for vent right...?"

he asked me with a bruised face and smiled like a fool.

"mmm da best!"

I answered with smile I could at most.

but still my tears didn't stopping...

"that...im glad..."

he smiled at me stupidly ...

This kid ... why does he do this only for an ex-teacher?

I look up at the sky and said in my heart (my husband I will not forget you and I still love you. But, maybe I will try to share my love with you with our child...and he... who saved me)

"so.. ughh sensei ...,"

"What?"

"can you get away from me? I'm starting to lose my breath here..."

"eh eh ?!"

after I stepped away from him ... and would help him get up, he was already unconscious.

there I panicked I was afraid of him would leave me and I immediately took him to the hospital.

==

that's where I started harboring feelings... to Kei-san.

that doesn't mean I like Shota! (little boy) but Kei-san is different, he's already an adult mentality at that age.

==

shortly afterwards, I arrived at Kei-san's apartment.

I took out the spare key from my wallet.

if you ask where can I have a spare key?

I asked the apartment owner and said if I was Kei-san's Onee-san and the apartment owner immediately gave the spare key.

*Creak*

I put the spare key back in my wallet, and opened the entrance to the apartment.

definitely at this time Kei-san still hasn't woken up yet!

I walked slowly, so to not awake Kei-san.

and head to the kitchen. its a been long time i didn't make breakfast for him~

i will make special breakfast for him hehe~

I made egg omelet and sandwich.

and also prepare Bento for later when he at school ~

ah because there are leftover vegetables maybe I'll make sandwich.

I cut off the vegetables ... and saw the clock on the wall.

Oh no! Kei-san will be late for school if he not wake up now!

I ran into Kei-san's room while carrying a knife in my hand.

*Bam*

I opened the door loudly to Kei-san's room and said...

"Kei-san you will be late—"

before I finish my words ...

I was shocked, shocked and angry at the same time! I can't believe this!

Kei-san is sleeping with a beautiful girl!

"KEI-SAN!!"

"Woah Shizu-Nee ?!"

I approached Kei-san with a knife in my hand.

==

[[~ Author note: if you ask why Shizuka doesn't know about Kei's accident.

first, the previous Kei, he didn't even have cellphones or telephone.

Also he doesn't have anything in his apartment, no computer nor television.

so the only know about the accident, is people on the scene, like Morishima and Tsukahara.]]