12 Try To Escape and Doubt

When the time came and it was nearly 7 am, I was ready, standing on the ground and staring at the cell door. I heard footsteps and my heart beated faster. I got nervous. Hopefully it will work. The person all covered in black was outside the door with clothes and food in one hand. It unlooked the door with a key and entered. I ran at it and tried to get past it but it was impossible. The person stood in the door and it was strong. Stronger then me. I couldn't do it. I couldn't past it. I tried it again but it didn't work. The person put the things down and closed the door again.

I couldn't. I was sad and started to cry. "Let me out!", I screamed but the person didn't answer. It just vanished and I was alone again. I sat down on the ground and held my hands infront of my face. I let my tears roll down my cheeks for a while then I stopped crying. I looked at the clothes and the food but I wasn't hungry. I just was so upset. I crawled back in my bed and slept till 9 am. Then I stood up and ate my breakfast which was a bowl of milk and cornflakes. The clothes were a blue and green ABAP FOB shirt, a blue vest, a gray jeans, black socks and underwear. I liked it but it couldn't really cheer me up. I just smiled sadly at the pretty shirt before I put it on.

Later I brushed my teeth and started to draw some scratches. I drew my parents, my sister and my friends. God, I missed them. I wanted home but I couldn't. I had to wait a little longer. Hold on. I couldn't give up.

I couldn't give up now. I will try it again. This time I failed but what about next time? I could make it. I could get out of here. I had to. I still had hope. Even when it faded sometimes. I wasn't done. I wasn't dead and that meant that I still had a chance. Also I didn't think that Fall Out Boy would leave me to die in here. They are no murderers. They are no killers. But I also thought they wouldn't kidnapp anyone and lock them up. What did I even know about them? Who were they? What were they capable of?

This is a test. I was sure. I just had to pass it and hold on. I sighed, put my notepad down and picked up the guitar. What should I play? What could I play? I knew a lot of FOB songs, some Panic! At The Disco ones, Twenty One Pilots... I could play Clear. I tried but it didn't sounded like it should be. Probably it's hard to play it with a guitar. Then I played Save Rock And Roll and hoped that someone will save me but it would be them. They got me into this mess after all. Why was I here? What was I suppost to do there? Die of boredom and loneliness? No. This wasn't it. This was not the end.

I looked up to the medal rods but I only saw the sunlight from outside. I sighed again and sat on the bed, staring at the ground. I sat there for a while, didn't think about anything specivic. It was 11 am and lunch will come soon. I wasn't really hungry yet. I wasn't really motivated to do anything but I also didn't wanted to just sit there and stare at the ground. Maybe I knew now what the knife under my bed was for.