3 Ms. Lovergirl

I start to run outside, and my heart was racing. I thought about my feelings, and it hurt so much. I could feel the sweat, drip from my forehead. I was hoping, the emotions, and worries would disappear. I just kept staring at the ground, I felt tight. I take a deep breath, in and out. I was tired, from running. I was tired, of caring for someone that didn't care for me.

I felt alone, trying to understand my own feelings. I just kept thinking and thinking. It was like, a web of anxiety. It was sticky and it stayed in my mind. I hated it, and I realized I didn't like her the way I thought I did. A part of me felt fooled by my emotions, did she make me hate her? She never took care of herself, and expected me to understand her. She never let me spend time with her, and I was important to her? I remember not being able to sleep, cause she ran away from her home. I didn't think, I would ever see her again. My stomach had a pit for a week, and it destroyed me. She treated me so terribly, when she was a good mood.

I was lucky, if she asked how I was. I know I don't hate her, I just get angry. Cause she doesn't take care of herself, and she expects me to stand by and watch. I remember what she said one day, it made me spiral. Into a panic attack, she said, "I don't want you to cheer me up when I am sick." It was like a stab in the heart. After being there for her, and trying to make her feel better. I opened discord, and I just ranted in it. I just had all my emotions explode. My heart starting to beat faster and all the tears running down from my face. Then someone, just stayed with me. She messaged me, telling me. If you have a pillow near by you, think of a comfort anime character. I just closed my eyes hugging the pillow so tight, and I felt a warm hug.

She gave me a few scenarios, of my comfort characters. She spent the time, writing all those words. She stayed until, I felt better. Something changed, with my feelings. I was no longer angry, I started to like her. We called the next day, and she was so precious. I remember, texting her. She was really strong, and how much strength she had. She was confident, and it made me smile. More than smile, I felt butterflies. I felt so angry at those people that treated her badly, it made me so angry. She was so sweet to them, and she just got hate back. She was really funny, and every joke. I was trying not to die of laughing. I just felt cute, sitting in my chair.

All these thoughts, It was lot in my mind. I stopped running, and took a glass water. It felt cold, and my hand ached because the glass was to cold. All those ice cubs, couldn't find a temperature. A glass of water was either, cold. Where your hand ached touching it, or room temperature. Where it is not refreshing. I felt hot, from running to fast. I was hungry, my stomach, grumbled. I wanted lunch, and I just couldn't wait to talk to her again. All those memories, just made me filled with joy. I just hoped, she felt the same way.