Chapter 5

Kattara

Three Years Later-graduation day

Levi graduates today. The last year was really hard on him after his grandmother died.. I had never seen him that way. He almost gave up; dropped out and went home. Levi spiraled. He stopped eating, he couldn't sleep. I was worried about my baby. But he pulled through; he passed all his final exams, with a miracle and a prayer and now my man is about to walk across this damn stage finally! I honestly think I'm more excited than Levi. It's alright, he'll definitely feel the celebration when we get home; oh yes, my man persevered when he really just wanted to curl into a ball forever (his words, not mine.) So he's definitely in for a treat.

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I'm running a few minutes late, as I am for every freaking thing, because I ran around like a chicken with its' head cut off trying to make sure everything was going to be absolutely perfect. Quietly making my way into the huge auditorium and taking my seat, I look through the clusters of caps and gowns for Levi. When I finally spot him, he's talking to some girl. She's really pretty; but he doesn't seem very interested in whatever she's saying so I decide not to pay it any mind and settle down into my seat.

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"Graduating top 5 in his class; maintaining a 4.0 GPA with a bachelor's in Psychology, Shinichi Levi Smith!" When they finally called my mans' name, I lost my mind! I guarantee that I was the loudest person there. I had tears in my eyes I was so proud of him. He looked so handsome up on that stage. The way his smile beamed let me know he was just as proud of himself as I was. He earned this. He wanted to quit so many times. This is why I wouldn't let him. This is why Josh and I stayed on him. Tajah, too. Once she caught him attempting to skip the class they shared and she dragged him out of bed and across campus to class in nothing but pajamas and slippers. she loaned him an extra pen and notebook so he could take notes for later. But it payed off. We all knew it. They all made it. Together. Levi's eyes scanned the crowd until they found mine. "I love you." I mouthed to Levi. He smiled at me and walked off the stage and sat back in his seat.

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After the ceremony, Levi, Tajah, and Josh ran too me and we hugged and jumped up and down. "I'm.. so... proud of... you guys! I.. love you .. so... much!" I said out of breath when we'd finally stopped jumping. "Love you, too," they responded in unison. "Alright graduates! Where to now?" While I waited for an answer, I noticed that Levi looked kind of distracted in his phone, "Babe? You okay?" Josh looked at Levi and then me, and then the floor. "Yeah mama, I'm cool. I am starving though." He said putting his phone away and wrapping his arms around me and pulling me all the way to him. Mental note. "Okay graduate," I smiled at Levi, looking up into his eyes, "What're you in the mood for?" Levi bit his bottom lip and looked down on me with a seductive smirk. I rolled my eyes and Tajah told us that if he didn't make a decision she was making one 'cause she was "hungry asa mutha'fucka" Levi laughed, "OK, aight, aight, uh, how about we head to The Dot?" "Nigga you want to go to work?" Josh laughed at Levi, "Le, no, lets go to Lin's" Tajah gasped. "Yes! Hell yes, buffet! That's what I'm talking about baby." She kissed Josh on the cheek. I looked at Levi, and he nodded in approval. "Alright then, we'll meet you guys there?" Levi asked Tajah and Josh, grabbing my arm, pulling me towards his car. I looked up at him confused, but Josh and Tajah said they would and hurried off towards Josh's' car. What's happening right now? I thought to myself as I let Levi lead me to his car.

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Walking into the restaurant, I was definitely no longer in the mood to celebrate. When Levi and I got to the table, Tajah stood up, came to me and wrapped her arm around my shoulders, "Are you okay?" She asked me. I looked at my best friend. We've known each other our entire lives. I KNOW her. "You knew didn't you?," "and did you?" I looked at Josh. Neither of them said a word but the looks on their faces told me more than their words ever could've. "Right, of course both of you did. You're his best friend, and you're his best friend's girlfriend. What I can't understand though, is how nobody found time to tell me?" I looked from Levi to Tajah, and finally to Josh. I was more hurt by all the secrecy than the actual situation at hand. I can move past that. But how do I trust any of them after this? I saw where everyone stood today; or at least that's how I'm looking at it. I felt my eyes start to water so I turned and walked out of the restaurant, ordering a Lyft back to my hotel on the way. Nobody followed me; that's not a bad thing, I really don't want to hear or see any of them. I just want to get back to my hotel.

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When I make it back to my hotel, I go straight to the bathroom to turn on the shower water as hot as it could go. After I head to the bed. Not even pausing to look at all the shit I set up for tonight, I push everything to the floor and grab my suitcase off of the dresser to find something to put on after I finish my shower. I'm not really in the mood to be sexy tonight but unfortunately, sexy is all I brought with me. Frustrated, I turn back towards the bathroom and get into the hot shower. The water instantly relieves some of the tension I'd been holding and I finally cried. I don't understand what I did to make them feel like they couldn't have just told me. What if it had been worse? What if there had been more? Who would tell me? I know it should have been Levi to tell me but when my best friend saw him procrastinate, she should've told me or at LEAST put a fire under his ass. Instead, everybody let me look... stupid. And that hurts my feelings because Levi really has my heart; Tajah is more like my twin sister than a friend and through her, Josh is apart of the family; and yet nobody could be honest with me. Ugh, but that's not fair because Levi did tell me, but it was after I spent the entire ceremony twenty feet away from- I slide into a sitting position in the tub, tears still flooding out of my eyes. I have no idea what to think; or feel; or what the hell I'm supposed to say to Levi when he gets here because I know he'll definitely be here after I stormed off without eating.

I cry for what feels like hours until I have no tears left. Once I'm calm, I stand and start to take a shower. Scrubbing my body, letting the hot water rinse away the day's dirt and stress I start to relax and feel better. After I rinse off the last bit of soap, I turn the water off and grab my towel while stepping out of the tub. Drying off, i walk to the mini-fridge and grab a bottle of water, downing half in one go. Once I'm completely dry I turn on the TV, turn out the lights and fall quickly asleep.

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