13 Scared of her!

Liam promptly returned from the golf course. Ryan was still sitting in the lobby resting his head on the sofa pillow, eyes closed.

He approached Ryan, sat on the sofa before him. Hearing the footsteps, Ryan had already sat straight.

He kept staring at Liam.

"Spill it!"

"Can you give me a minute? I'm tired", Liam tried to test Ryan's patience a little more!

Ryan stood up and stood up and put his hands in his pockets, then slightly titled his head white frowning, "I won't repeat myself one more time!"

"Why are you so impatient?" Liam asked again with a smirk.

Ryan averted his gaze. He indifferently walked towards the table in the lobby then spun the spinning top placed on the table with a frown.

"….. I don't want to owe anyone!"

"….. Ryan, do you know why I'm doing this?", Liam asked with a serious tone.

Ryan brought back his eyes to Liam now.

"Do you know what you blabber when you are drunk?"

"….."

"Of course you don't. Since your visit to Alaska, You've been telling me that you miss her whenever you are drunk!"

"….."

"At first I thought you are talking about Ying Yue since she went abroad those times".

Ryan frowned.

"But one day, to my surprise, the name that came out of your mouth was not Ying Yue, but Rhea!"

Now Ryan seemed a little startled. He knew that he had thought a lot about her once he came back from Alaska, but he didn't expect himself to splutter her name!

"You misheard it!"

Liam shook his head, tried to say something. But when he looked at the persistence in Ryan's face he understood, that no matter what he says, the one in front of him is going to deny it! It was written all over his face.

"Tell me what is important!"

"Ok, Ok", Liam started in a rather fed-up tone.

"One day your apartment security guard called me. He told me that it is an emergency! He asked me for your apartment passcode!"

"....", Ryan was looking at him with a stern face.

The apartment Ryan living in was constructed by one of the most famous construction companies. The land was owned by them too. The people who lived there were all rich and popular people who valued their privacy more than anything. So the company had given their inmates a lot of freedom. That's why it was a perfect residence for Ryan who was a fading star. The apartment gave him some peace. There were no many disturbances. Yuan Yu and Liam were his only visitors.

There was no spare key system for any of their apartments. So if the security guard wanted to enter his apartment, it was not possible since he didn't know the passcode. But the apartment policy required the buyers to give them at least two phone numbers of family or friends in case of emergency. Ryan had given Yuan Yu's phone number since she was the one who found the apartment for him, then Liam's as well. It was just for the formality.

"That time I had just reached your apartment so I told him I'll be there in a few minutes. Since that was a call from a stranger, I didn't want to give away the passcode. But he told me that you were going to fall from the balcony. Since I was on the ground near, I looked up and saw you. You were happily sitting on the balcony balustrade and downing the bottle in your hand!" he angrily paused.

Ryan remained calm!

"...."

"Ah, it still gives me goosebumps. Back then, you almost gave me a heart attack!"

Ryan was still calm!

"What does it have to do with Rhea?", he only moved his lips, totally unaffected!

"I'm getting to the point!"

"Ok"

"Then I told him that damn passcode of yours. Then I hurried to your apartment." Liam paused and looked at Ryan. Now he seemed curious and worried. Well, how can he still be curious, and why the hell he is suddenly worried? Ah, maybe because it's going to be about her!

Liam scratched his head once before he spoke.

"They had already pulled you in when I went there"

"They?"

"Of course! Rhea and the security guard!"

He could see a cloud of confusion on Ryan's face.

"She was the one who saw you first! She was the one who told the security guard that you are going to fall from the balcony!"

That made sense. It is unlikely that the security guard was looking up at the sky, instead of doing his duty. There must be someone who had informed him at first.

"If it's not Rhea, who knows what would have happened? Even I wouldn't have dared to barge into your apartment when you were not willing to open the door unless I saw you on the balcony. But there is no way for me to see you in the first place. Why would I stretch my head to look at the eleventh-floor balcony anyways? But I don't know why Rhea did that either. You were just lucky that day!"

For some reason, Ryan felt that it was not a coincidence that she appeared there. As Liam said, she didn't accidentally look up and saw him. 'Could it be...', before he could think it through Liam continued.

"When I reached your room you were lying unconscious on your bed. The security guard told me that you were already unconscious when they reached you. If they didn't come at that time, if she didn't appear in time, you would have fallen and ended up dead by now!"

"...."

Liam was lost in his thoughts of the day...

Once he checked Ryan's body condition, the security guard introduced himself. Rhea was so shocked that time. She didn't speak for a few minutes, her gaze fixed on the table before her. When Liam asked for her name a second time, she was startled then told her name.

Rhea! The name had already given Liam a hint. She was from Alaska. Didn't he also go to Alaska a year ago? Another hint!

Liam had asked Rhea if she already knew Ryan by any chance, just to make sure. She told him the half-truth, told him about her being his tour guide.

Liam didn't ask her for more information. He was sure by then, that it must be her.

Within a few minutes, Yuan Yu also came to the spot since the security guard had already called her before calling Liam asking for his passcode. Since she didn't know his passcode, he had called Liam.

"Then Yuan Yu came" Liam just told Ryan that part.

Ryan knew this already. So he didn't ask why. He could now understand how the three collaborated.

Yuan Yu must have met Rhea then. Since the two already knew each other, Yuan Yu must have lured Rhea into her plan of a movie adaption. It was not that difficult for Ryan to guess. He knew that Yuan Yu treated him like her own son. For his well-being, she will do anything.

But Rhea... She is innocent. She doesn't even know an ounce about this industry. She doesn't know that she'll be involved in many problems if she assisted him. She must have agreed to help him, out of... kindness! He can't let her suffer because of this.

Ryan was almost right. The one who brought the movie idea was Yuan Yu indeed. Rhea used to mail Yuan Yu whenever she went back to Alaska during the holidays. She didn't want to let her know that she had already moved to Shanghai to study. She felt comfortable that way. So, Yuan Yu had already read both of her comics. Seeing Rhea in Shanghai, she was shocked in the beginning. But she was a lot more worried about Ryan. She had seen Ryan being nice to Rhea. So she wanted to team up with her to find a solution.

It appeared to her, that it was not a bad idea to make her comic into a movie, with Ryan as the male lead.

But Ryan was wrong somewhere. Yuan Yu didn't have the necessity to 'lure' Rhea. Rhea was more than happy to be a part of his movie in the first place.

Both Ryan and Liam kept quiet, lost in their thoughts.

Although Liam knew Ryan was not trying to die, back then, he didn't show so much interest in living either. He understood his totally carefree, reckless act of that day.

At those times, if Ryan really had anything in his mind, then it must be Rhea. Because even though he was drunk day and night, the only thing he ever spluttered was "I miss her"!

Liam understood Ryan better than anyone else. He knew that Ryan didn't really have so much interest in popularity and stardom from the beginning. He was just living his life. Since he had an extremely handsome appearance and extraordinary acting skills, he climbed the path of success so easily.

He was never interested in anyone. Whenever there were rumors about him dating, he never cared about them either. The only time he dated, was due to the promotion of his new film. So it was more like, he was pretending to be in a relationship.

The pretense was actually to help the director of the movie!

At that time, Ryan was working in a movie where his costar was Ying Yue. There was a rumor spreading on the internet that the story of that movie was stolen from an assistant director. Even though the assistant director didn't make any claims, it was most likely that the people will boycott the movie since they believed it was made by stealing someone else's work. The movie was the third film for that director. He was not a well-recognized director yet. He too has invested a lot in the movie. If the movie is to become a failure, there was a big chance for him to go bankrupt! The director must have thought about it. After so much thinking, he could only think of one way. Since Ryan was so popular, if he really dates the female lead, then that means people will give the movie a try. It was the only way he could think of to promote the movie.

One day he had come to Ryan's house almost pleading with Ryan. He even cried.

After giving it so much thought, and confirming that the story was not really stolen from that particular assistant director, Ryan agreed since he had nothing to lose by doing so.

A movie is not only about the actors, directors, and producers. There are so many people who work hard behind the scenes. If it fails and didn't make the money invested, all the people who had worked in the film can get affected in different ways. Some may lose money, some may lose fame, some may lose their career.

Ryan wanted to help!

If that could help a man live a better life, why not?

He had seen so many people struggling in this field to the point of going bankrupt. So he really wanted to help.

He let out a statement that he is dating Ying Yue. She did the same! Just as the director predicted, the movie was a success. But no one expected, this will end Ryan's career.

Liam also didn't know about this!

Ryan is a private person. So it is not possible even for his friend to know about his personal affairs. He believed Ryan was dating Ying Yue. Ryan had told him the truth only when the scandal broke!

Since Ryan didn't try hard to climb up the success ladder, when he had to slide down, he didn't even try to grip. He was not even willing to make any statements regarding his innocence. The only thing he knew was that he was bored and depressed.

Ryan had always been bored. There was nothing much interesting in his life, from the beginning. But from the day he had returned from Alaska, he was depressed. There was not even a single thing that was interesting. At first, he tried to indulge himself in acting, so he didn't feel much of this feeling. But as the time passed he felt it more often and when he started to stay away from acting, his depression once again lifted its head.

It was like he didn't have any energy to fight back everything that he is going through.

It was like he is just fine that way.

It was as if even though he fight back and win one day, he won't be happy anyway!

That's why he drank.

Every time he goes to his apartment balcony he would look in the North-East direction. Although he knew it was ridiculous, he would think that she is there far away in that direction. There are times he stayed looking in that direction for a very long time.

Alaska...

It was the place where he experienced his most interesting days.

There were times he wanted to go back to Alaska. But something was not letting him go back and it was his guilty conscience.

He was guilty!

He was guilty that he had kissed an innocent girl. To his dismay, she was still in her teenage. She was just eighteen!

He was guilty that he still had indistinct feelings towards her.

That day, he had hurried back to Shanghai, without even taking a glance at her at the airport because he was already struggling between these feelings. Though he had so much affection towards her, kissing was definitely crossing the line!

So... he can never go back!

Kissing a girl, without her knowledge... while she was sleeping...

He didn't want to give his improper act a name, since he was more than scared of the word!

He tried to sort out his feelings yet got more confused.

All this while, sometimes he yearned for her, sometimes he craved for her. But all the time, there was a strong unexplainable affection, which he didn't want to interpret.

Whenever he got closer to the answer, he was scared that there will be no turning back once he understood what it is. Finally, he decided to let it be and got drunk.

Just like this, he learned to live with those feelings. She became a part of him.

But, he didn't dare to see her once again in his life.

Additionally, he is seen as a cheater by most of the people around him. So he decided to go further away from her.

Since what he wanted the most couldn't be achieved at any cost, he decided to let everything go!

Although he was seen as a fading star, there were still people approaching him to act in dramas and commercials. Yuan Yu asked him to act in her new movie many many times.

But Ryan stopped acting in the films.

The only thing he was sure about was that he was a coward! A coward who is so scared to face her!

With time, he had forgotten everything... He thought so!

But it turns out that he was guilty when he was sober and was missing her when he was drunk!

The moment he saw her in Shanghai, he had reacted that way because he was happy and ashamed at the same time! Though he had done such a deed towards her, she still wanted to help him genuinely. It was enough to make him feel more desperate than ever!

"You are so careless. But Rhea cares about you a lot. I've seen her being so worried that day", Liam who was lost in his thoughts spoke.

After a very long silence, Ryan spoke. "Did she see me in such a pathetic state?"

Liam didn't understand at first. Then he understood what pathetic meant. He was talking about him being a drunkard!

Liam was seriously dumbstruck. Shouldn't he be astonished and asking something like 'Did it really happen?' or 'Did she really saved me?' but he seemed only worried about her seeing him in a pathetic state.

"Yeah, she did. So what?"

"You shouldn't have let her see me like that", Ryan spoke again. He looked sad.

'What the hell?' Liam was angry.

"You care about your image now? Why weren't you worried all this while?"

"......."

"So tell me how I should have reacted back then? There were two options. One is covering her eyes so she will not see you or else pushing you off that balcony so she will never see you again" he rambled on in disapproval.

Ryan was not listening to him anymore. He was seriously thinking.

Liam wanted to use this opportunity...

"I know you don't want to act anymore. But, Yuan Yu, Rhea, and me, all the three of us really hope that you will come back stronger. We just want you to act once again. Just one more film"

"....", He seemed to be thinking.

Seeing Ryan's stern face, Liam let out a sigh then continued.

"Rhea was really worried back then seeing you like that! So you must do something about this!", he was confident that will work. He hopefully waited for his reply.

"How do you think I can repay her? Other than this method?"

"Of course you should pay back with your life. Since that's impossible, just do what she asked you"

"….I need some time to think"

"What is there to think?"

"In my current situation, anyone who associates with me will be in trouble."

"So you don't want her to get into any trouble?"

"Mn"

"But she is already in trouble dude! She rejected the producers, in the meeting today, for you!"

Ryan ran his hand through his hair. "That's why… Let me think"

"Ryan, if you know her, you must also know how persistent she is. It's better if you agree with her. Otherwise, my instincts tell me that she will end up doing something reckless!" Liam had already tried talking to him, so he finally tried warning him.

"…."

After a long time, Ryan spoke, "Why is she here in Shanghai?"

"Ah, she told me she joined a college here"

"What?"

"She is living here"

"What? Why?"

"Ask her yourself. I'll arrange a meeting with her tomorrow"

Ryan suddenly lifted his head in shock. "A meeting?" he asked. His face showed all of his internal struggles like a clean mirror!

Ryan suddenly remembered what happened that day with Rhea. Also remembered that she already knew about the kiss!

In truth when Rhea directly asked him about that kiss hours ago, his heart almost stopped! He still didn't know what that kiss meant, still didn't dare to give that feeling a name either!

For him, that kiss was something which is preventing him from getting closer to her. The source of his guilty conscience. So he had tried his best to avoid reminiscing it.

When she asked about it that day, he suddenly remembered what exactly happened and how he kissed her.

From that moment onwards, he wanted to kiss her once again. This urge to kiss seems to be growing so Ryan wanted to hide from her even more.

So, a meeting with Rhea is a definite "No"!

Liam was amazed by his sudden reaction.

Ryan had been always cool, from his childhood. This nonchalant nature is something Liam admired the most about him. That's why Liam usually calls Ryan 'A cool head'. But suddenly, that nonchalant Ryan disappeared. It was indeed a rare opportunity for Liam to see him so tensed and shocked.

".....By any means..... are you s...cared now, Ryan?", he asked. Although he spoke slowly as he could, he couldn't hide his excitement!

"…." Ryan was still speechless, but somehow he brought back his nonchalant demeanor.

"Pfft" Liam fell on the sofa, rolled, and laughed. He couldn't hold it in anymore.

Ryan simply ignored Liam. He had so many other things to worry about. He can take care of Liam later. Besides, he couldn't blame Liam either. It was true that he was afraid to meet her. He didn't try to hide it! He was still wondering if he should go or not!

Once finished laughing, Liam sat down properly. "Finally there is someone that scares you. Hahaha"

"….", Ryan stayed nonchalant as usual!