You Are Afraid of Death

Screaming citizens, soldiers crying, swords clashing, the swoosh of bows, fires crackling, and a haze of confusion. This is what my eyes saw and ears heard that day. -Andromeda Eleusis, Journal of a Thousand Journeys.

-=+=-

Peering out the window in the throne room I began to panic, I saw a helmet capped in jewels entering the main halls, the guards unable to subdue them. "Crap!" I speak out in frustration and defeat.

"Why are you so angry Sage?" King Thebes asked in a bored tone, ignoring the peril that was fast approaching this chamber we stand in.

Turning around in a stomp and lashing out, I speak my mind, "Do you not understand father? We are about to be killed in our own castle! Our people have turned their backs on us and our former allies have joined in the fight against us!"

The king slumped on his throne. "So? What do you plan to do, fight them on your own," he said while snickering at me like I was a fool. "We downtrodden them and you expect that they wouldn't fight back?!" He slammed his fist into the throne.

I was shocked by his lack of worry over the situation, he knew this would happen. "I- I thought that you had this all planned...I- I that we were doing this because you knew we would come out on top!" I shook my fist in a rage, "Why did you do all this?" I pursed my lips not expecting what I would hear next.

"Because...." He stood up quickly and flaying his hands out as if preaching to a thousand people, "I am the mad king! Slayer of those different from me, bringer of terror to those who oppose me!" He sat back down in the posture of a king, "A king who takes pleasure in the suffering of others," he smiled wickedly, his image piercing into the depths of my mind.

I was speechless, who was this man in front of me? He's always been high and mighty, perhaps the things he did were dark but his personality was anything but dark. Now he was a calculated killer. I leaned against a wall and fell down. "What have I've been doing all this time," I felt defeated for the first time in my life. "What is my purpose?"

The king crackled in a mad laugh, "Ahahahhah! Oh my dear niece you did serve me well, you allowed for my ascension and reign to go smoothly!"

"Wha----t?" My mouth agape, "Ni- ni- niece?" My eyes were full of disbelief I stumbled towards him.

"You know the rules, I can't ascend the throne without an heir." Picking up one of the two knives from the small table next to the throne he started to twirl with it as he recalled his story. "My wife ended up having a stillborn, but my brother's wife did have one, two in fact but the first one was already too old," he paused his knife and looked at me, "so I killed them and stole you." Another wicked smile.

"No... no.. no." I slowly began to back off, "My parents are dead.... and I was raised by their killer...."

"You know," He stood up and walked to the balcony, "there is a species of bird that lays its eggs in another bird's nest and then those birds take care of the egg."

I grip my fists, "But in this case, the bird would kill the parents and raise the kids once they hatched."

"You're missing the point, the stories we write about nature, of its beauty and kindness is wrong." He turned around and his short brown hair glowed in the light, "Mother nature is ruthless and terrible, and I am just like them, I've done nothing wrong."

Disgust flashed in my eyes, "Your logic if flaw-"

"How!?" He shouted. "Explain to me now every flaw!"

"Be..ca.."

"What was that?!"

"It's.. be.."

"What??! Talk Girl!"

I had trouble thinking as he kept pressuring me, more and more he began to lose his cool. "Tell me why you did it?"

"Hee," he smiled like he won, "Let me tell you, we have a bit before our demise."

'Narcissist' I thought to myself.

"If I were to tell you when I discovered myself, it would be when I found an injured bird on the ground."

I already could imagine what happened next as he gripped the knife in his hands harder. 'gulp'

"And I crushed it," he smiled even more, " and the blood dripped on the white snow that evening and I felt something." He basked his head more the light "Uhhhhh that feeling I knew I wanted to chase it."

I felt as though I saw hell for the first time, "You're insane! How did you get this far!"

He stomped down the steps with each phrase, "Because I'm smart, calculative, persistent, and self-aware."

"What do you mean?"

"The most dangerous person a dear niece is a person who knows they're evil, knows their life is one that others would look down upon. Or just in general, self-awareness is the key to moving forward."

Laying on the floor I threw up after holding it all in for that time.

"But there is one thing I lack to continue to survive," he announced nonchalantly.

Feeling done for life, I get the strength to stand up. "And what would that be King Thebes?"

"Hah! It's something you have dear girl! It's not your jack of all trades, you may be smarter than most, stronger than some, clever than the rest, more talented than the common people, but other than that you are a master of none!"

"Is what I have the ability to bear insults from their uncle?"

"No!" He said with excitement, "It's your fear!"

"What?"

"Ever since you were young you've feared the world, you got it from your mother, oh she was a beauty, she had your brown hair that touched her shoulders and your eyes that were as green as the sea during dawn!

"What do you mean by fear!" I yelled impatiently.

"Oh right!"

I was getting tired of this point by his change in personalities every sentence.

"You are afraid of death! While I am not, I can kill myself on the dime while you will be too scared for the blade to even touch your skin."

"What do you mean?"

He held the knife up to his neck, "No matter what when you die it will be by the fault of others, your fear will always keep you safe as much it can!"

"Don-"

"Now now dear girl! I may be a terrible person but I can tell a good person from myself. You've done terrible things these past fourteen years. If you want to be better, you must self-reflect and be aware of all the things that are happening to you, everything about you, you must be self-aware!"

"I- I- have nothing..." I said to him.

"Ah my dear that is for you to figure out, you have no strength to do what I am about to do, So I hope you will survive, it will be interesting to see from hell what you do next, ha!" He slit his throat.

I shield my eyes, walk to the throne in his place. I try to remain strong but I breakdown I couldn't remain strong. 'What do I do, please someone help me, I don't know my mother to pray to her or my father.' I didn't even think my god would take pity on me. I try to use the knife on the table left behind by him to slit my throat. I wanted to prove that monster wrong. Alas, I could not do it.

"I have no strength." I drop the knife and slide slightly down the chair.

'BANG' Light from the halls flooded the room.