1 System, Family, And Death

[Existence, it is expansive and endless and it is imperceptible to the feeble minds of mortal. But within existence is the system, but before it was the system it was energy, it was life. It was born from the aura of all living things, and the miasma of all that is dead. It is the nothingness of that which does not exist, the void within our hearts and the void within space, it is the path to power and the ladder that brings you down to nothingness and obscurity.

It has been a long, long time since the system became a part of earth, but its arrival brought on change the likes of which man has never seen or experienced before. Or so these stories go, for one it was shitty as hell! If I have to say it, as everyone else seem afraid or lack the balls to open their damn mouth and tell the truth! The system coming to life was the worst possible thing to have ever happened to the universe.

Like seriously, whoever told the fucking energy of the universe that we wanted to be as strong as the heroes of old if not stronger, that we could step on clouds like it was the very ground itself and run on water like we were fucking Jesus Christ of Nazareth! Fuck! this drives me mad! But I digress, the system has done quite a few good things, like the fucking propaganda says. The lame could walk, the blind could see, even if it was mostly not with their natural eyes, and the deaf could hear. Hell on earth or not, the system opened earth up to the possibilities that were literally endless, it opened this bloody blue planet to the universe, to the aliens, and parasites and the wars beyond the stars…. some say it's the path to Godhood.

But 5000 years have passed and I am left asking…. Where the fuck are the gods, all we have are tyrants and monsters in the flesh of men, machines and aliens. It is hard to find good in anything the system ever gave, cause all of our lives had been hell, or at least it was…. until I met him. The man who changed everything and showed me that life with the system was not one of chaos and being helpless as the rich and strong remained stronger…. he showed me that for the first time ever…. the less privileged, the ones broken under the heel of oppression, that the common people… that I! could fight and change my destiny against powers I couldn't possibly hope to beat, and all I had to do was be strong, how fucking messed up is that!]

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What was it like to die, or better yet what the fuck was it like to die because of your own twin brother, we're or rather were a religious family; my brother, our elder sister and our baby brother were born to a reverend and a deaconess respectively. And one thing my father had been so adamant about outlining and trying to prevent his children from emulating was the bible verse that said a man's worst enemy is from his own household.

Life is crazy, honestly all I wanted to do was to go to school and study and get a degree and be something more than what the world expected of me. My brother is the elder twin and by tradition he was the one to inherit our father's fortune. A member of the clergy he might be, but the man had built a business empire capable of taking care of all his children and their latter generations to come. But all of those, that fortune belonged to my brother, the ever shining star within the sky, so bright that even the sun itself would be eclipsed by his brilliance.

And yet he ran with a cult, he drank, he smoked, he stole, he lied and he killed. The perfect example of a bully, and one that had no regard for human life whatsoever. If it was in his way, he would never hesitate to remove it. And today he got in someone's way, and they wanted to remove him.

I think I felt the impact of the bullets before I heard them, the horrified look on my brother's face as he realized he had drawn me in the line of fire, forced me to take the bullets for him. White hot anger lanced through me as I gripped his shirt as hard as I could, blood spilling from my wounds and my teeth gritted in pain as my mind became filled with haze. I fell to my knees and dragged him with me and I heard him pleading, begging, but I would never give him that satisfaction.

Because of him I've been a target of enemies trying to make a point, he was loved, the first son of a first son. I was relegated and told right from the beginning that I would have to make a life of my own, I had to raise myself, fight for myself. The academic accolades meant nothing in light of the fact that he was the heir, and I was just the extra nobody wanted. I looked up at him, and I let the hate and the anger show, maybe this was not the right way to go, but if this was my final moments I'd rather he knew, that he learnt exactly what I felt and thought about him.

"I hate you! I hate you so much! And I'll never forgive you…. all of you!" and that was it, I could vaguely hear him telling me that he was sorry and screaming for help, but I didn't care. I was bitter, hurt, frustrated and betrayed beyond what most people would ever be able to handle, and unfortunately I was taking that bitterness to my grave. I wish I had more time, more chances, but I've lost them all like usual because of my twin brother….and so.... I DIED. A perfectly good end to a totally unremarkable life, unfortunately as these thing go as I'm sure you well know… death is never the end, even though I sorely wish it would be. It's just the curtain closing on one stage, and the cha-cha playing the caramba on another fucking dancehall that people call life! And as a bonus, I have no idea what a cha-cha is, or why the fuck it would be playing a caramba!