19 Raindrops

The water fell onto the window like a harsh blow to the face. It had been raining in stars hallow for weeks now. Graduation came and went and so did Jess Mariano.

Apparently Lucy further found out through Rory that they had a fight. He had found out he was flunking out of school, about to be held back.

So he beat them to it. He gave up on everything. Had a fight with Dean.

Lucy knew how the rest of that night goes.

She couldn't believe Jess would just up and leave her. Without saying goodbye. No note, no witty clues. He wasn't there that night either. That terrible terrible night.

____

She sobbed into her hand as she hurried down the street towards Luke's diner. The lights were out and no one seemed to be upstairs.

No Luke.

No Jess.

She hurried to the next place she knew he would be at. The lake. She hurried onto the bridge and looked around.

"Jess..?" She felt the name sadly escape in a cry. She felt her breathing seize for a moment before trying again, "J-Jess..."

"Jess!"

_____

She didn't find him that night. Or any night since.

CRASH!

She jumped, startled from the clap of thunder resounding the house. She breathed uneasily and watched outside as it poured.

This was the third time she allowed herself to get stepped on. First her father, then Taylor, and now Dean. And who did she blame? Herself. Only herself.

"Dean was drunk, he had no recollection of it ever happening." She would tell herself. She could have stopped it if she hadn't froze.

None the less, she wanted to stop being weak. She needed to be strong. It was time to be an adult.

"Lucy?"

She jumped, startled once more by her grandfather. "Pop.." she sighed, "You scared me."

"Lucy you're concerning me." He said "You haven't been outside at all." He pointed out.

"Pop, it's raining."

"Not all summer." He said and sat down putting his cane aside. He observed his grandchild and sighed, "Lucy I know that look. I dread ever having to see that look ever again." He said tapping his finger on the armchair. "But it's a look I know too well.."

"What are you talking about." She said tired of his vagueness. And just plain tired.

"You had the same look the night your father was taken into custody." He said.

Lucy looked down and rubbed her head. "Poppy, please don't.." she begged as she could already feel the tears glossing over.

He looked at her and it pained his weak old heart. "I won't." He forced out. He got up and took his cane. He scratch at the metal top with one of his fingers. "Your therapist is coming by today for a quick session, since the rain is a bit much."

"That's coincidentally considerate of her." She sighed and looked back out the window as her grandpa left the room. She hated shutting him out. But there was no way she could bring herself to say anything word on that night. She just couldn't fathom it.

She got sick even thinking about it.

_____