I Need Help!

In my mind many things that I want to do, say, hard to explain - even for me - I see someone following me - running but there is no direction - I feel heavy like I am carrying all people's worries even though I am still young - I need help in finding myself - a word or two - I want to hear a voice who can calm down my nerves - even my blood is flumping, I NEED HELP.

I don't know what I am dealing with - I hope it doesn't kill me in the end - I want to write but I can't find the words to say. I NEED HELP.

I feel like starving but not from food - neither thirsty from water - I feel this way every time I am alone, even though I like to be alone. I NEED HELP.

UNTIL NOW I haven't had someone to love me - neither did I - What is love? Is it feelings - or is it a person? - Does love exist or is it just like parents love for children - even sometimes we don't have any kind of love in our lives. I NEED HELP