Snitches Get Speeches

My name is Morpheus, renowned in the ancient times as the god of dreams, but more recently a pop culture icon associated with acid trips. I've been mostly retired since the Romans unsubscribed and took up Christianity, though thanks to bros like the Wachowskis and a literary rock dude named Neil Something, I have more or less survived the crusade that annihilated my following.

I have appeared in countless iteration over the years, in no small part to comic books, films, and a bunch of other artsy-fartsy crafts that was too lazy to create something original. It's not that I'm blaming them or anything, as they kept me afloat when deities like Porobonus and Sheela faded to obscurity (while others became demons for the 'good guys' to bully), it's just that my form became muddled through the public domain—lost in translation, so to speak. In contrast, fellow gods like Heracles and Thor never strayed too far from their source material, and when they do, it's almost always a biased improvement (Yes, Thor, I'm looking at your obviously salon-treated, Playboy bunny locks).

So, in an effort to stay relevant in my own terms, I decided to play divine paparazzi and invade your surreal private space. I'll drop by your dreams once in a while, picking up what I see in your twisted subconscious to fuel my creative output. I'll be sure to tweak elements here and there because your raw visions probably suck, if not altogether jumbled soups of mess none would bother to sample. Don't be surprised if you chance upon your dream sequence in the following chapters. I can't be held liable for matters like invasion of privacy, plagiarism, libel, or whatever else your weak mortal laws constitute. If anything, you should be honored that I actually bothered.

Contrary to what the blurb says, I'm not doing this because I'm bored; I'm doing this because I can. Hopefully, the new, abstract me will be made whole again, and you, as my witnesses could justify wasting your time on the internet.

Without further ado, let's bid reality adieu and make those dreams come true...