Hard decisions

"You cannot be serious!"

Adela's silence further fuelled Arkin's ire. His angry objection came out in shaky whispers as they stood by the ponds in their hiding place. It killed him to see her like this, she seemed every bit like the sacrificial lamb to him and he could read her thoughts in her eyes, she was simply driven into a corner.

With a contorted face and an armored fist, a riled Arkin hit the nearest tree log.

She was certain that he would react this way after hearing her decision. Rightfully so. The lady's social suicide could bring disgrace to the entire Archduchy, but the benefits of accepting Egon's offer were what Adela focused on the most right now.

"...I thought about it all the way back here, you are the only one I can confide in,"

Arkin paced to the pond and back to her with his hands intertwined behind his neck, he paused and gave her a sour look, "It is because I cannot possibly refuse you,"

She shook her head, "It is because you understand me the most, it is because I trust you,"

"You, I trust with my life, Lady Adelaide, but him," his mouth tightened into a thin line, "His eyes that look at you with malice, I want to pluck them out of his face!"

Adela rubbed her arms with her hands fighting the chill that Arkin's honest words made her feel. It was true. Apart from the short, peculiar moment the two had in the cottage, Egon only looked at Adela with loathing eyes.

"It matters not how he looks at me,"

She did not sound convincing.

"You cannot possibly deny it! What kind of indecent agreement is this? Who would make a business offer to an unwedded noble lady with your status? He says he has nothing against you, then asks you to soil your reputation with your own two hands on his behalf! What is his next step? Have you all to himself when no other family looks your way?"

Adela's fingers tried to massage her scalp through the headache, Arkin was under a very wrong impression and there was little she could do to change his mind about it. She did not have enough energy to waste on that.

"I would rather die, Adela! I wish I did. I wish I closed my eyes in that cursed forest and never opened them again! It would have been better than seeing this day…Better than seeing you this way!"

Her heart throbbed at the prospect of losing him, her hand almost went up to touch his face, but she made a fist mid-air and pulled it back to her.

"Listen to me, de Lanark's lost lands aside. I must gather more information about the von Conradie merchants, their involvement with the uprising, and their history with the Archduke…"

These were the things the two of them have been talking about every time they met nowadays.

"...Being physically next to them has many pros if you were to be reasonable about it,"

He shook his head feverously, "If it is information you seek, we can talk to the Baron and…"

biting his tongue, he decided against making empty promises, he doubted that his stubborn father would let them in on anything the Archduke wants to keep a secret. He looked at Adela with an aching chest.

"Something major happened in the past, whether they are in cahoots with the rebels or not takes a sidestep to that feud. They are here for revenge, My Lady, you are aware of it, yet you throw yourself in danger's way like a…Like…"

She gave him a cold look daring him to finish what he was about to say. but Arkin was not trying to challenge her in any way. He knelt down before her and held the edge of her coat then brought it up to his lips and kissed it.

"My Lady, you are far more valuable than to be jeopardized, far more precious than to lower your position for the sake of gathering information…"

She swallowed the impulse to collapse and cry in his arms. The image of Larissa's crying eyes gave her the patience she required to wager her reputation and her father's tolerance for what he had formally called selfish alibis.

"I have to protect my family, and what that man asks of me happens to be something within my power, I dare say I am quite good at it even,"

The knight looked up at her face and found a mask of bravery. Growing more and more despondent, he had half a mind to plan an assassination at night and be done with it by the morrow, rid his sovereign of the possible humiliation she might suffer at the hands of those unworthy to lay eyes let alone a finger on her and her abilities.

"Promise that you will get the hell out of there at the first sign of endangerment, intentional or otherwise caused by reckless behavior on both parties,"

Adela's hand trembled by her side. I am really going there tomorrow. The affirmation was unnerving. Did she bring it upon herself? Running around in a disguise and playing doctor for those who cannot afford one?

She closed her eyes, "I promise,"

"Promise that you will come to me right away,"

"I will come to you…" her voice was strained as she struggled not to cry in front of her childhood friend, "Right away,"

He sprang up to his feet, visibly shaking — All he wanted to do was hide her in a place where Egon von Conradie could not dream of reaching. But the woman who bloomed like a sacred flower before his eyes was not born to be hidden, her fragrance was to spread everywhere around her, only then could she be content.

"...It was not that boy's doing,"

She tilted her head in confusion, "Pardon me?"

"Our cover was blown by the Baron; he overheard a couple of knights whispering about the amount of gold gathered for the auction and started an investigation…"

Arkin's temper flared once more when he saw the guilty look in her eyes.

"You should have come to me before you went back to that cottage,"

Adela nodded petulantly; she could not possibly tell Arkin the truth about Larissa's feelings and what made the trip to the cottage a priority.

"Nicolas's innocence was obvious, but I am still glad to hear that it was your father..."

Arkin did not look pleased about it.

"He has been blabbering endlessly about the legal consequences of fraud and the horrible position we would have placed the Archduke in... Do not worry, your involvement in the matter remains undiscovered by anybody,"

Hearing these odd words of reassurance, the depth of her upcoming lie finally took its toll on her. Deceiving the Archduke might just be a fatal mistake on her part. One that she had to make.

His faith in me might not survive this blow…

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