7 Chapter 7 (Sanity / Goodbye)

I am in my room, looking at twilight.

I'm a little anxious for Adrean, I'd like him to send me a letter like this (sigh)

Without realizing it, my thoughts fade. I can hear the sound of the ocean waves, the texture of the sand on my feet, and an immense peace in my heart.

—Jessabelle— says a deep voice.

I approach it, with a wide smile, but this white silhouette stops me suddenly.

—Don't go any further. He asked why, but this silhouette rose even higher.

—You don't have to die yet— and it rises higher and higher.

—Please take me with you— and I start to cry.

—Things are not like that, it is not your time yet— and disappears in the immense light that the sun radiates.

In the distance I can hear how they cry inconsolably, I try to go ... but without realizing it I am sinking in the immense ocean, more and more ... and more.

I feel how the peace vanishes and an anguish takes hold of me ... I can't get out. I take a deep breath, close my eyes and think about the words in that voice. Over and over I repeat them in my mind.

I wake up abruptly, I'm in a coffin ... and I can hear them cry. I try to scream, but I don't have a voice, I try to hit the coffin, but I don't have enough strength. I start to cry, something in me tells me that this is not real; But still I can't help not cry

—We will withdraw— says my father.

—You did this, I never want to see you again in my life— and he begins to cry.

I can hear them walk away, yet my mother is crying.

—I love you my daughter, you did not deserve this. I should have protected you— I wish I could hug her, it breaks my heart to hear her like that.

My eyes are closing, for lack of breath. I'm suffocating, I can't move or speak ... it's painful.

Abruptly awake, he glanced at me quickly in the mirror and sighed in reassurance. I did not find meaning in any of the dreams I am disappointed.

I'm really losing my mind in this situation. I know it sounds stupid, but it is stressful not knowing if I am really in reality or is it just a dream.

I sat all morning watching the beautiful sunrise, thinking about those blue eyes. I go down immediately to the large dining room, they are having breakfast.

—Good morning dear— my mother says as she smiles at me.

I give him a kiss on my cheek and take a seat.

—I have a letter, daughter— says my father as he hands it to me.

I quickly take it in my hands, the letter is from Adrean, I put it away and have a quiet breakfast.

I go to the great mountain and begin to read the letter.

"To: Jessabelle Jones

Hello my precious Jessabelle, I hope and you are well. This letter is specifically to tell you what is coming your town. I heard the king say that the famine will seize the villages and they will recruit men, we are in a war my dear Jessabelle ... now I am the captain of the ammunition ship and I will also go to the center. Please do not forget that I love you love of my life.

Adren "

I put a hand on my mouth, tears come to my eyes, I put the letter still aside. I stand up and put my hands on my head while circling. I have to go, I need to go and be with him ... but women can't go to war.

I am heading home, but when I arrive some horses are at the entrance ... they come to recruit my father.

—What's wrong?— I ask as I sit up, my mother is crying and my father has a sad face.

—Your father will be recruited, a war is coming— and he begins to cry.

—He will not be recruited unless he has a boy, they are orders from the king. He goes to the dock before 8 o'clock we'll be waiting for him - and he leaves without saying anything else.

This is my chance but ... what will I do to be allowed in? We entered the mansion, with a melancholy that can be distinguished by meters. I go to my room, to think about what to do, how to solve this problem.

I sat there all afternoon thinking that I didn't realize that night fell, I have a plan but I don't know if it will really work. For my family and the love of my life, I drink alcohol and drink a little.

I take out some razors and start to cut my hair and take a drink from the bottle, remove my make-up, wait for nightfall and pack the clothes most similar to a man, I continue drinking. I start to get dressed, I put torn clothes on my breasts as if to crush them, and I look at myself in the mirror, I wait and it works please.

I sit down and take a sheet of paper, start writing.

—I am sorry for not being born a man, I know that I failed you father, however you deserve a long life with my mother. I will give you honor and I will make you feel very proud of having had a woman as a daughter. I do not know worry I will return safe and sound I hope so. I love you with all my soul and thank you for everything. "

I take my luggage and go out, I place the letter so that they see it. I leave the mansion and walk with the horse so as not to wake them up, seeing the mansion in the distance I get on the horse and look at the mansion for the last time and finally I go to the dock.

My life passes lenThrough my memory, my vaguest memories come back, as if they happened yesterday. And the strength and the courage take over my heart, I know that I will achieve it.

I am on the dock, I can see how the men are formed, I get off the horse and take my luggage and go to form like everyone else.

I try to look like a man and behave as manly as I can. I form, everything is silent. The commanders begin to take roll.

—If they hear his name they will go immediately to the ship" and he signals.

A few men went by, three to go and my turn continues. I try to hide my nerves, I sigh long.

—Tomas Jones?—And he looks at me closely.

—He's my father, my name is uh ..— WHAT A NAME TO DIRE!

—Is it?— And he watches me.

—Cristian, Cristian Jones— and I look at him steadily.

—Welcome Cristián Jones, let me tell you that your father trained me, I expect a lot from you— and he looks at me seriously.

I nod and immediately get on the boat. Sigh of tranquility, if it happens I can't believe it, I felt a lot of nerves.

It is time to be firm with the decision you make, there is no going back, I swallow hard. I hear how they call us.

—Good morning dear soldiers, I am Alexandre son of the king and you will be taken to the training ground in Rochelle. I do not want fights, much less problems between all of you, you only come to one thing and that is to serve France— And he puts on a bully face— If I find out that some of you are fighting, you will be immediately transferred to your homes, banned from salary and most importantly his honor— and he retires.

ALEXANDRE? ...

—Captain, we have Tomas Jones's son— and he smiles.

—Son?— And he watches him carefully.

—That's right— and he looks at it.

—Well, take him to my office—and he leaves without saying anything else.

A man approaches.

—The captain wants to see Cristian— and I follow him.

Among the men we made our way and entered the captain's office, ALEXANDRE !.

—Captain—and he stands firmly.

—Come out Henry— and he beckons him.

Alexandre takes a seat and undoes a button. I try to tell him something but he is ahead of me.

—What's your name?—And he makes a serious face.

—My name is Cristian Jones Captain— and I look at him steadily.

He looks me in the eye, and smiles.

—I recognize those eyes wherever I go—and he sits up. He touches my cheek and takes off the hat I'm wearing.

—What are you doing here Jessabelle?— He says it in a sweet voice.

—I had no choice, Alexandre, my father barely can walk— and tears come from my eyes.

—Easy, your secret is safe— and he smiles.

—I promise you that I will put all of myself, I will not be a burden— and wipe my tears.

—You are the daughter of a captain who made history by being the bravest and most honorable. Bravery is in your blood and I know you can do this and more— kiss my forehead.

He closed my eyes and smiled at her.

—Thank you Alexandre— and I look at him with joy.

—I love that sweet, challenging look. Whatever is offered, feel free to tell me, I will always be there for you— and he smiles at me.

—CAPTAIN!— Shouts a soldier.

I immediately put on my hat.

—Yes Henry?

—THE PIRATES!— And he leaves.

We immediately leave and see pirate ships approaching.

—LET'S SURROUND THEM, SURROUND THEM!— Shouts Alexandre.

And they start firing cannon shots. The boat jerks, I quickly get behind the wheel, I look at Alexandre and we both nod. They fire a cannon again.

—AHHH!

I run as fast as I can, and they fire a cannon shot again. I got behind the wheel, and yelled at Alexandre.

—NOW!—And I turn it to the right. I dodge a cannon—ANOTHER CAPTAIN!— Alexandre cuts her off without hesitation, and dodges them more cannonballs.

The pirates are targeting us.

—JONES, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO CROSS THOSE ROCKS!—Alexandre shouts.

—YOU CAN ALL MY CAPTAIN!— I sighed deeply.

—CUT THE CANDLE ON THE RIGHT SIDE!— Everyone yells at him not to do it, but he looks at me intently and ... he cuts it off.

He tips the boat and bumps a bit, however we managed to cross. The pirates try to stop, but they collide with the rocks.

—CONGRATULATIONS SOLDIER JONES!— Exclaims Alexandre.

Everyone applauds me, and congratulates me.

—I told you captain, you won't let us down—and he smiles at him.

—I didn't doubt it—says Alexandre.

I smile and we talk for a few hours. They all thanked me, but I really did it on impulse, I wanted to survive.

I stared at the sunset, gazing at the sea, the breeze fell on my face and I took a deep breath. I want to meet with Adrean, if he dies I die, I would not be able to bear not having him with me, and I also do it for my father he deserves a peaceful life with my mother ... after everything they have happened to me, everything I have done to them spend, sad nights, worries. This is nothing compared to everything that happened, I know they will be sad for my departure, but this is for them. I promise to return, and make you proud.

Memories cannot be left in the past because they are part of us, of who we are. I don't want to forget, I want to create more memories and be able to be a new person.

Full of experience and cultes, with great stories, I want to create history in this world, I don't want to be forgotten.

I think about Adrean, how he is ... it makes me sad not being able to be with him, I would like to hug him and tell him how much I love him. I will need a hug from him to have the courage to continue like this.

I will do my best to deserve to be with Adrean, so that the obstacles get out of our way; I know it will not be easy, but nothing is impossible. I'm sure our happy ending is written. I smile at the sea and the sunset.

I know that the saddest moments will have been worth it, what I suffered in the past now are simple vague memories. I take the necklace the old woman gave me from my pocket and kiss it.

—Is it your lover's necklace?—Asks a soldier.

—It was a gift from my ... mother— and I look at it.

—I understand. Excuse my ignorance, my name is William— and she puts her hand out to greet him.

—My name is Cristian— and I salute you.

—I'll tell you something Cristian, my wife doesn't know that she came— and she leans her shoulders on the shore of the boat.

—Sometimes it's better not to say anything so as not to hurt people— and I look at the sea.

—You're right. And does your family know that you came?

-Do not.

—I understand— and he lowers his gaze.

—Why are you here?—He asked as she watched him.

—Because they forced me, and they will give money to the family." What mine needs the most is that— and watch the sunset.

-I understand. I'm here, because I want to make my father proud— and I smile.

—I understand, you can be sure they will be my friend—and he slaps me on the shoulder.

—That's how it is my friend. It's a wonderful start— and I smile.