1 Introduction

Milton looked at the robbers with his dead fish eyes, his mind not even registering that they were threats. Of course, the robbers themselves were all metahumans, each one of them can claim they can bring down the whole building, that's why they decided to rob the bank, the Flash could not take them down without a fight.

"Who the hell are you, asshole?" one of them, about 2.5m tall asked him while walking closer.

"Just a man looking for some excitement," Milton answered, unbothered by how the man was looking at him like he was a piece of meat to be eaten. He laughed a little crazily before punching Milton only to have his whole arm break, followed by a banshee like scream.

"What the fuck did you just do to Julio?" his partner shouted at Milton who just shrugged.

"Nothing, just took the punch like a man," Milton answered without interest. The man picked up a gun which glowed for a moment as he aimed at his head then fired. A bullet was shot out, all glowing like it was hiding an earth shaking force in it and it hit Milton right on his face. It exploded, turning the whole section behind Milton into rubble, good thing there was noone but him there.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? You just gave the cops and heroes a chance to get in here without any obstacles!" the only woman in the group reprimanded the man who just ignored her, looking at the clearing smoke. The he was, Milton, still looking apathetic at them. The man's eyes opened wide in disbelief.

"No way, that was enough to even stagger Supes! How is he still fine?" the man gasped, unconsciously back peddling. Milton saw how distraught the man was and decided to comfort him.

"I felt an itch there," he said with a kind smile but the robbers took it the wrong way, especially the shooter! That shot was his best and he was certain even Superman would not be able to tank it without showing a little bit of emotion or even staggering yet this guy was humoring them! To Milton, he was actually feeling a little generous, he did not feel that explosion at all.

"You fucking bald bastard!" the woman shouted as she clenched her fist, ready to attack. But, Milton suddenly appeared in front of her, his eyes showing he was mad. As he raised his fist ready to punch her, everyone inside and outside the building felt as if the whole planet was collapsing on them, making them faint instantaneously! Milton quickly regained his expressionless face and calmed down.

"Fucking bitch, call me bald again, I dare you...no, I double dare you," Milton said as he picked her up and started shaking her with one hand, only to have her start frothing in the mouth. He then sighed and threw her down before walking out of the bank through the huge hole created by the explosion. Everyone was unconscious outside too, including the police so he decided to take the three robbers to jail himself. That done, he went back to his home to enjoy some peace and quiet before the whole city wakes up and starts calling his hero persona names.

Three years ago, Milton fell into a manhole while he was chatting with his friends on Facebook. He did not know what happened until he hit the raw sewage, making him gasp in fright but that was a bad idea as he ended up swallowing some, making him retch and dump all his lunch into the sewage. He then proceeded to hoist himself up the ladder and finally out of the man hole only to see something crash right beside him. He looked down and nearly shat his pants. He saw a buff guy wearing the all familiar Superman suit groaning in pain! He then opened his eyes and saw him, his eyes showed panic before he looked past him (Milton) and the panic turned to fear. In a speed Milton could not even comprehend, he found himself out of the city then a shockwave threw his ass a few metres away.

He groaned in pain as he tried to get up only for another shockwave to hit him and something was dragged past him, making a huge ditch wherever it went. When he looked at the thing, he found it was Superman himself, only he was bleeding.

"I was trained my whole life to become the best soldier Krypton has ever had. Where did you train, Kal-El, on a farm!" Milton beard a person say from behind, but he didn't have to turn to know who was the one speaking, General Zod his mother-fucking self! A blur flew past him, smashed into Superman, making them dig further into the ground before Zod punched the man of blue to the sky and followed after him, leaving behind a devastation on the ground and a scared Milton who definitely would never say he just shat his pants. He then took off, not caring where he will go but to just get out of the city.

Two weeks later, he had settled in Atlanta, working in a small supermarket trying to forget his trauma. Then, he decided that if he was going to die, then he will die as the strongest Canon fodder there was. In order to accomplish that, he did the whole Saitama training. He woke up at four in the morning for his 100 pushups, 100 squats, 100 situps then a ten kilometre run.

His first few months were hell, his whole body was aching like he was a 90 year old wrestler and his later work in the supermarket loading and offloading stuff did not help at all. Also, there was an air conditioner there so he quit and decided to work as an Uber driver, only his car did not have the air conditioner which gave him low ratings.

On his second year, he noticed he had no hair on all of his body except for his eye lashes and eye brow. That's when he knew shit got real. To even confirm it, be was starting to care less and less, remaining only to be apathetic. On the third year, his emotions were frozen and only intense things would make them surface, like feeling like crying whenever he touched his bald head or going into a fit of rage whenever someone mentioned his bald head.

He decided to become a hero in Los Angeles where he was currently living and since then, his life had slowly changed from workouts then work to hero work then watching anime. His income came from the thugs he beat, he would take a small percentage, call it a tax for his hero work so unlike the OG Saitama, he was not broke and today was a normal day until he found Batman, Superman and Wonder woman in his apartment.