2 Never Giving up

"Advik, baby, wake up" I said as I gently kissed his forehead waking him up.

Ha yawned loudly still sleeping. "Five minutes. Pwease mama" he said in deep groggy voice. But again I looked at him sternly which woke him up a bit dramatically. He then went to brush his tooth and did his bed. He then went to do shower as I waited for him to come back. He understands that his mother is not like everyone and he still supports me.

Advik is my five year old son. Even though he is not biologically born to me he is always my son. It's been five years since the accident. The accident where I lost my mother. The accident which made my husband give me divorce. Or say ex husband. The accident where I lost my legs. But still I am here and I am making peace with life. It isn't easy to hear the doctors say that I couldn't walk again or it isn't easy to here him to say that due to the same spinal cord injury that I couldn't conceive ever. It broke my heart. Society questioned and showered with their pity. But why I don't understand. The one thing I don't really want to receive is their sympathy and pity. I want people who could support me by believing in me and not by pity.

Because I am making peace with the fact that I don't have legs and it doesn't make me weak. And it does the opposite. I did cry over the fact that I don't have legs because the only thing that I used to ever think was being a dancer. But those dreams have crashed. I never thought of seeing myself in a wheelchair. But here I was going to live my whole life in this wheel chair. After the accident I was completely bed ridden for whole two years which is very difficulty for me. I used to be scared of going out because I feared the society. They gave me judgemental stares. But still I didn't give up. I did degree in business. Before I got in a accident I did degree in medicine especially specialised in heart surgery. But again I couldn't do that now. After I got degree in business I started my own company in hand made textiles. I took help of my friends. It isn't easy then either. But I waited patiently. After one and a half year of extreme hard work and team dedication we got the top place in nation. Our company also succeeded into getting in the sixth position in the world wide. I then started hotels, casinos, etc. which also got a wide range of popularity all over the world. The same people who judged and questioned me, were now looking at me with pure admiration.

Advik. I found him in a dust bin. He is two year old baby when I found him. He is crying and wailing when I found him. I immediately took him to a hospital and by God's grace he was somehow alive. He isn't healthy. We had to admit him in the hospital for one month. Even then he used to get so many allergies and his immune system is used to be very weak. But still he is there. The first when he called me 'mama', it was a whole new experience to me. The bond we shared may not be by blood but he is my son and no one could ever change that. I usually think of him as a God's gift. A light in my life. A ray of Hope in my dark tunnel.

A reason for me to live. I used to ask myself why was I even alive when I don't have anything. Maybe that's why but I got the reason. I got a company to lead which a million people of lives were living in the hope. My son where he wants a mother and I would never give up.

I am still searching for my family. I started searching for them just a month ago. And I am stilling having doubts if they would ever accept me or not but I won't give up to my fears. I know I am strong enough to face my fears and I will be damned if I fear.

Because I strictly think failure is an option but giving up is never an option.....

Before I could proceed my thoughts anymore, advik came from the bathroom freshly showered and ready for his school. Unlike all the students he didn't cry over going to school. Instead he turned to me and kissed my cheek saying " take care mama, I will be back from school before you know" he said this and went towards his school waving his hand saying bye.

He said that studying make him feel good. I couldn't understand that so i just let it go. And when I asked what his dream he said that he wants to be like me.

This kid maybe a five year old but he acts more mature than any of the adults. He even knows that I am not his biological mother. He figured it out himself before he asked me to confirm his doubts. He thought that while have a very deep blue eyes and Raven black hair, he got deep chocolate brown eyes with blonde hair.

He even understand that I couldn't do all the things like all the mothers and still he showed me his patience with every passing minute. And I love him so much and I know he does the same.

After he has done his work and took all the needed things and packed it, we went down to dining room and he ate his cereal and drank his milk while I waited for him. After he completed I dropped him at his school. Not an easy driving but my assistant helped me. After I dropped him I waited until he got inside and then drove towards my office.

Life wasn't easy but I am not planning to give up. Even if I do fail I will give up.........