Good Times

I didn't know where I was, my mind wandered, traveling far away, beyond what my body could reach, floating in nothingness, a total calm, I felt nothing, I heard nothing, I saw nothing... Nothing existed, I really didn't exist...

-Do you feel good? -asked Lisa worried... And suddenly everything around me took shape and I returned to reality... To the horrible reality...

We were in a cafeteria, probably in the center of the city, it was night and we were in front of each other at a table at the back of the place. Lisa looked beautiful, with a coat for the cold, a red scarf, she had no makeup, as always her face was more beautiful au naturel, so pretty...

She looked older...

Lisa was a little taller, her hair was longer and her face was a little harder... What day was it, what year were we in? My head hurt, I felt incapable of remembering things, it was as if my memories were fragmented, the last thing I remembered clearly was the day at the beach with Lisa... But from then on everything was confusing, I could only remember certain moments, I remembered a hospital, Lisa's face crying, a funeral, a party and a night at the hotel, but all those memories were mixed up and incomplete, I had big mental gaps... How much time had passed?

-You don't look well... Did you take your pills? -Lisa's voice was a little thicker, I wasn't sure how much time had passed, but it must not have been much, Lisa looked a little older, but not that much, maybe one or two years older... I didn't know what pills she meant...

-Yes... -I answered even though I didn't want to, it was as if my mouth was moving by itself, my hand moved by itself and went into my pocket, I felt something inside and I took it out... It was a bottle of pills whose inscription said "Aripiprazole"... I had never heard of that drug, but for some reason I knew perfectly well that it was... It was an antipsychotic.

I looked at Lisa's face, she had a worried and sad expression that I could hardly understand, I didn't know what was happening, it was as if her world was broken, as if my mind was no longer useful as before, I could no longer feel anything, nor desire anything, my love for that beautiful and incredible girl no longer existed, now my heart no longer accelerated when I saw her... And all I could think about was how incredible it would be to crush her head... I discovered that I was no longer myself... That something had happened, maybe it was the day at the beach that had changed me... And become what I really had to be...

I didn't know why, but now my whole being was just calling about the death of that girl, I no longer had any doubts about what I wanted, my thoughts were no longer double, I no longer felt remorse, it was as if my body had made all ideas about love and sadness, about hate or joy disappear and I had only left the raw and terrible desire to kill... I no longer wanted to delay what should happen, I no longer cared about the consequences of what would happen, ironically, I was not even in a hurry to move the day forward or delay it, I knew that day would come and I only had to wait for the universe to give the signal to act.

I finally understood what I was, what I had become after a slow but fast process over the years. Now I was completely a fish moving through the stream of events, the person I once was no longer existed, now there was a monster with no feelings and no ideals who was driven by his murderous attempts... I was the monster this world needed, I was the thing for which everything in existence had waited...

It was the monster that would condemn this world and its future... And that could no longer be avoided...

-I think we should leave now... It's getting late and we don't want to be that late -said Lisa as she called the waitress and asked for the bill. I didn't know where she was referring to or why it was bad that they were late... But I knew what I would do there... And like an electric current that ran through my body, I understood what day it was... And my monstrous mind began to convulse and produce endorphins in great quantities...

It was finally the day that the monster ate his princess... That poor girl had tried to delay it as long as she could, but finally it was the day that the world would meet its "Mictlantecuhtli"...