The Lier 2

Sometimes people just blame me. People blame me because they think I am the person to be blame for everything. When my friend die when we were kids, his mom blame me. she did like me. My friend had a crush on me. I was the last person who spoke to me. he die in front of me. he had cancer. I forgotten his name it hurts me because I lost a friend. people said I need to change but it hard to change. I am 14 years old I turn 15 on April the 26 but today is the April 6. When he had said his last words was had cry. He had a paper, he was going to ask me out. I was crying. I said don't go yet. But he said I like you since i bully you and I will always love you know matter what. When he dye saying those words I burst into tears. I said wake up wake up. the coach took me away holding me. I cry so bad I let go the coach and went to his body and huge him and crying on his body. The students were staring, like saying it was my fought. the mom came an saw me. She blame me with his death and the coach took me. He didn't want to call my parents because The mom didn't want know one to know something happened. She didn't invite me to the funeral. I was sad. ever since now I don't feel happy a lot. people don't like me. Like dating me or so. the boys just use me. When I see people or my sister date I feel sad or jealous because they are lucky than me. Yes I could have a crush but I be stupid. I still hate myself. Sometimes I don't want to be alive anymore. ever since I made friends they don't like me as a friend. They use me as there friendship. sometimes I don't know anymore. I don't want to make friends anymore because I am afraid they will use me like the others. people say I have to open up to them but I can't because there is always someone that will judge me. I always hated what people did to me. I always wish or pray to God if he will find my true love or something but he never answered my prayers. That's when I stop believing in God. Idk anymore. I am ashamed what people had said to me. People or students had bully me ever since I was born. I was the mistake child and was blame of being born. Ever since I was was born I had saw demons and Angels. I had never that that can happen. since I was a baby I felt Happy outside but inside I felt sad. I had always fake a smile. When it was Christmas, my grandma had a party at her house. I had wonder around. When I saw my Tia pass by i went to the restroom dark. It was my first time I saw a demon I got scared and cry, before my Tia came and open the door I got cursed I didn't knew at all on till it was in 7th grade. Angles and demons were always following me. I didn't knew why some people became my friend. But there was this guy in middle school who because friends with me. He was a full demon. how did I knew because he talk about it all the time. We were friends for along time till now. I don't know my sexuality. I still think I'm bisexual or bicurious. I had like Arath since seven grade, he knew. After I get to that point in 7th grade I saw it. The demon, I felt ashamed. I had started studying about it. One day I got a dream about it. but I am the princess of the demon and the angels. Yes it weird. I never get it. but after a week I did. I was born we two parents. so when I die I can go with both. Will my demon always follow me. but one day I gotten worse. something happened to me. I felt sad, when people started blaming more and bulling me. the demon control me. I had started cutting myself. I had wanted to die because what been going on, I had hide it from my parents for too long. When it was 8th grade I was speaking to my friend and he had ask me out. we had secret date. My parents let me go to his house. I did, when I was at his room he gave me a paper of a spell like a different language. I don't know how but I managed to read it. I read it and saw my demon. I got possessed and had dark black eyes. My princess demon had woken up. My friend had a demon it grows and has task. But we had to feed it. after that week we stop dating. He found out I was cutting myself but he understand. He support me, but he didn't want to be in my problems. In mother's day it was my last day cutting myself. The next on school my parents found out what I did. They were freak out. I regret it what I did but at the same time no because I was ashamed of myself. when teachers found out and students. They felt bad and let me got to the field trip. but I wasn't happy at all. People say I am special but I am not. I still cry, I feel like people still judge me everywhere I go.