5 A Transcendent Artifact

The Heaven Cleaver looked to be rusted and unusable. Had any other person found it; they'd believe it to be a twisted joke that some elder was playing and thrown it away.

But the person that happened to find it was a person with a great understanding of underestimated things. Chu Fan knew that this kitchen knife was truly a treasure.

After considering the strange occurrences around the cafeteria that seemed to flip the rules of heaven and earth; this knife here happened to be a transcendent artifact.

It was sealed away and lay in a dormant state for many a millennia until a couple of decades ago, in which it awoke. The soul of the artifact, in its hunger had greedily absorbed the heaven and earth qi in the surrounding area to satiate its hunger; and thus it had caused a "curse" to appear.

Giddy with excitement, he examined the knife. It held the appearance of an cleaver; with it's tang running into the hilt. The hilt itself was made from a horn of unknown origins; it had an emerald green sheen to it alongside having great grip. The hilt was carved into the shape of a lifelike dragon; almost as if an azure dragon were in Chu Fan's very hands.

He then calmly followed the letter's instructions and bit his right index finger to drip a droplet of his blood into the dragon's eyes.

In the next moment a gust blew in his direction and the dragon's eyes flashed a light that shot in to Chu Fan's glabella where his scar was located.

The knife began to shake violently, freeing itself from Chu Fan's grasp. It began to levitate and the rust on the outside layer of the knife disintegrated to show a gleaming new knife. The blade was of a steel color along with patches of gold mixed in.

Had he not been in the warehouse at the moment, others would have easily spotted him in broad daylight.

It descended slowly until Chu Fan grabbed the knife. He then ran his hand down it's spine in admiration; the knife itself felt as cold as ice.

"This knife is not made of any ordinary steel it seems." stated Chu Fan to himself.

"Of course not. I was crafted using a meteor; and my hilt carved from the horn of an ancient azure dragon." spoke somebody.

"What? Who's there? Show yourself or I'll... I'll chop you into mince meat." asked Chu Fan in a panic.

"Hahaha, master you humor me. I'm the very blade in front of you. You'd have a better chance at mincing yourself as you're the only person present." said a voice.

Chu Fan wrinkled his brows and looked at the Heaven Cleaver in his hand.

"How are you speaking to me?" Asked Chu Fan.

The knife vibrated and then the voice said, "I'm speaking through your mind. When you put a drop of blood in the dragon's eyes a link between you and me formed. I am master's loyal treasure forever. At least unless you come to an untimely death."

Chu Fan shuddered at the word "death" and asked, "Why would I need to be connected to you?"

"Of course you need to be connected to me. How will you cook efficiently? I can morph into anything you can imagine in your mind. As long as you have it pictured, I can turn into it. My base form though is that of a cleaver. Try it out." stated the Heaven Cleaver.

Thinking for a moment, Chu Fan thought of a brilliant thought. He closed his eyes and focused drawing the object in his mind.

The Heaven Cleaver in his hands then leapt and *poof* it transformed into a microwave oven.

Eyes widening, Chu Fan felt a flash of inspiration and started thinking of many other cooking tools.

The Heaven Cleaver continued to morph into many objects; some that questioned its own ability to understand what could be considered as cooking tools.

Exhausted it whined to Chu Fan, "Master, I can only transform so many times in a day. I require qi to transform so frequently; and you've managed to use almost all of my saved up qi reserves from the decades. Please supply me with qi or I shall go back into slumber."

Turning back into a cleaver; it flew to rest in Chu Fan's left hand.

Nodding his head he pet the Heaven Cleaver and imagined it to be a bracelet cookie cutter and it transformed into one. He wore it on his left hand.

Exiting the warehouse satisfied with his findings, he headed back into the cafeteria.

The skies were already clearing and the aura of uneasiness had dissipated from the area. The cafeteria itself as full of color now; despite it being very empty.

He made his way back into the kitchen with a wok over his left shoulder.

As he entered the kitchen, he was shocked by the scene unfolding before him.

The army of sous chef puppets all glared at him as he enter. One of the puppets that seemed to be bigger than the rest came to stand in front of Chu Fan.

It was drawn to his identification holding his information and status as Head Chef. These puppets had a function that allowed it to scan someone's identity badge for the sake of allergies and if the disciple were a vegetarian or not.

"Greetings, Head Chef Chu Fan. What are your orders for us today?" asked the puppet in a robotic voice. This puppet was the only one with speech capabilities.

Chu Fan was shocked; these puppets too, ran off of qi. Except these puppets were equipped with an array that automatically absorbed and distributed the qi necessary for its function. The puppet itself possessed an artificial soul stone to connect all the runes to its power source. These puppets were individual puppets with an artificial intelligence.

"Uh, you may start by cleaning this kitchen and cafeteria up. If we have any cooking utensils, make a list of it if we don't have it in the warehouse." stated Chu Fan.

"YES HEAD CHEF!" stated the puppets with a salute. And so the cleaning began.

Considering the size of the cafeteria in it's entirety, cleaning it would have taken at least two days. Chu Fan with the collective help of the puppets, that numbered 108 in total, managed to do it in a mere six hours.

When he was done he collected the list of utensils that he needed to get, and ordered the puppets to go into rest mode until the next day.

Sweating and tired, Chu Fan headed to his dorm to get his clothing; and he headed towards one of the many bathhouses around the sect. They gave the option of an indoor bathhouse or outdoor bathhouse; and Chu Fan had been itching to try out the latter like in the dramas he'd seen.

He chose one that seemed to have a great view of the moon as well as being void of any other disciples. As he walked around a corner; he spotted a figure standing on a crate, peaking over the walls into the open-air bathhouse.

This figure was the one in only head disciple of the sect, Xin Hai.

Chu Fan grinned from ear to ear. He felt it was his lucky day. First it was a treasured shape shifting knife; and now it would be the extortion of one of his life's future foes.

He whispered, "Big Brother, what are you doing? Are you shopping for peaches, melons, or grapes? Or have you set your sights on worms, elephants, or flood dragons?"

Noticing the short-haired cute fat kid standing at his knees, Xin Hai knew his cover was blown.

"Shh! Be very quiet. Now be a good little junior disciple and leave big brother alone. I have important matters to attend to." he stated with a smile.

Smiling, Chu Fan said, "Big Brother, everyday I study and practice my cultivation; but none of it seems to work. I work hard and get sweaty everyday. I feel I need a new method of cultivation. Can big brother supply me with one from his personal collection so this little brother may become big and strong like you?"

Understanding the hidden meaning of his statement, Xin Hai glared at Chu Fan with a killing intent.

And so he thought for a couple of seconds before smiling; and handing a slip to Chu Fan to put away.

Feeling the killing intent behind the smile, Chu Fan's heart began to race. He knew what dangers extortion entailed and fought hard to stay brave. Like many heroes he'd read of, he played the fool.

"It's so dark tonight, I hope a giant dog or cat doesn't scare me tonight. What is a small child to do but yell out bloody murder." Chu Fan stated aloud to himself.

"Little brother have no fear, for this Big Sister shall protect you if need be." said a sweet and entrancing voice.

"Eh, Big sister, I'm new to this sect. If this junior disciple, Chu Fan, may be bold enough to ask; may i have your name?" stated the chubby little gentleman.

"Little brother Chu Fan. My name is Chu Shen. I'm the direct disciple of River-flowing Peak's hallmaster Bu Fu. You seem to be very cultured." said Chu Shen.

Chu Fan glanced at Xin Hai, flexing his eyebrows and mocking him with a smile.

Tired of hearing this little fat child speak, Xin Hai left before he could be stripped of all his assets.

"If you ever have any troubles, you can come to me and I'll help you in whatever way I can. Now, which peak do you belong to?" asked Chu Shen.

"This little junior comes from Forest Peak. I'm also currently the head chef of the sect. If ever big sister wants to eat anything, you can find me there during opening hours." said Chu Fan.

He had to shamelessly advertise his cafeteria as his future depended on it.

"Ah, you're from Forest Peak? Do you know Zhong Chen? He's the handsome and heroic direct disciple of hallmaster Chen Si." asked Chu Shen.

"Yes, we are acquainted. Do you wish to relay a message to him?" asked Chu Fan.

He had understood the situation entirely. From Zhong Chen's reaction to Xin Hai to the events just now. There was a wonderfully tragic love triangle in the happening.

"Mmmm, no. But I'll take you up on your offer of food though; maybe we can talk about Zhong Chen then." said Chu Shen.

"Okay. Then I shall be heading off big sister. I'm not afraid of the dogs anymore. Good night." he said as he began running.

"Have a safe trip." waved Chu Shen.

And so Chu Fan made his way to another bathhouse. This one too had no disciples around and so Chu Fan entered. He stripped himself nude. Free of his sweat-drenched clothing, he felt light. He then headed outside to the open-air bath.

He scrubbed and rinsed away the bits of caked-on dry sweat and grime from his body to feel his originally smooth skin. He then got up and entered the bath. Feeling like the fatigue had disappeared from his body; he sighed deeply as he lay down into the water, floating up like a boat vessel with it's twig-sized flag sail raised proudly for the world to see.

Under such a beautiful moon he basked in the warmth of the bath and forgot of his worries.

For a moment he fell asleep and felt at bliss with himself. He began to dream of his past and his happiest moments in life so far. Then in brief moment he saw everything disappear into darkness. He was surrounded by the darkness.

In a state of panic he woke up to find himself under the water, and out of breath.

As he surfaced from the water he spit out a mouthful of water and created a big wave. Flailing his hands about, his hands landed on something soft. It felt springy like a pancake, and so he smacked it with his left hand as to feel it's reaction. To his dismay, it hardened the moment his palm made contact and slowly softened again.

"What an interesting thing, I've never felt something like this in all of my life's entirety." he proclaimed.

As he opened his eyes, he noticed it was a butt. One the size of an unripe peach.

He wondered whose but it was that he'd slapped and looked up.

He saw what appeared to be a boy with long hair. As the figure turned to him, he noticed something was missing form this boy's body.

With a confused expression on his face; he looked up at the face of the other party.

And he tensed up as he finally came to a realization that this was no boy but the cross-dresser known as Yao Lingyan. His nose began to drip blood; and his cheeks flushed red, prompting Yao Lingyan to blush also.

"I'm so sor-" he stated.

Before he could even speak, he had been kicked in the face by Yao Lingyan. But to him this moment lasted forever also as his adrenaline skyrocketed following his near-drowning seconds ago. He noticed saw and took down many details from this "boy's" body. On her left-inner thigh was a crescent shaped birthmark. Her scent was also one many boys could never have because they simply did not give off such pheromones. Her long and let down hair seemed to compliment her angry face very well. The tenderness of her sole almost made him feel ecstatic as he questioned whether or not he was a masochist or not.

Chu Fan never thought that he'd encounter or have any seemingly masochistic experiences in this lifetime.

While he thought this his conscience faded; he had passed out from the blunt force trauma inflicted by the kick.

And when he awoke, he was in his dorm room. The other children had all fallen asleep, except for Da Bao who stayed awake looking at blueprints of various magical trinkets he wanted to create next.

"How did I get back here?" asked the groggy Chu Fan.

"Yao Lingyan found you passed out in the open-air bath butt naked. It appears you slipped and fell into the bath; hitting your head onto the base of the bath itself." stated Da Bao.

Chu Fan, given a flashback of a foot arriving in his face. Chu Fan turned towards Yao Lingyan's bed corner to find that the demon-race girl was glaring at him.

She had feigned her sleep and listened in on their conversation for fear that Chu Fan would expose her. Locking eyes with Chu Fan; the two blushed at the sudden realization of what had happened tonight. And so Yao Lingyan rolled over to stare at the wall in embarrassment. Despite being a spy; she was still at her very core, a girl.

Chu Fan could only scratch his head and turn around to face, the still talking, Da Bao.

"He called some of the seniors over to dress you up and bring your belongings back here. It took three seniors, THREE grown disciples, to bring you back here. Anyways, you've been asleep for two hours only." explained Da Bao.

Chu Fan couldn't help but laugh at the thought of seeing three senior disciples carry him out of the water like a piglet and dress him.

"Bwahahaha. Of course it would take three seniors to carry me here. I'm Skyward Sword Sect's biggest and most precious treasure, the head chef." stated Chu Fan with his left thumb pointing to himself.

With a snicker followed by laughter, Da Bao laughed.

"Hahahaha. I couldn't hold it in anymore. I'm a sucker for the worst of jokes including puns." exclaimed Da Bao.

And so Chu Fan laughed alongside Da Bao.

After the two finished laughing, Chu Fan curiously looked at the blueprints in front of Da Bao.

"What are you planning to make? It looks so complicated." asked the curious Chu Fan.

"I'm going to attempt to make a time-incubator. It's purpose will be to absorb qi from the surrounding area and simulate the passing of time for objects within it. It's great for growing herbs and fermentation." stated Da Bao.

"Oh, what an awesome magical treasure. What are it's limitations?" asked the curious boy.

"As of the moment, I can only make one that simulates 5 years. I'm having issues with layering of the runes. It makes me dizzy just attempting two layers. It will take me years before I can truly create a time-incubator capable of simulating 1,000 years." sighed Da Bao.

"That's alright. If you can already simulate 5 years despite being only a year older than me; I feel you can eventually achieve 1,000 years eventually. I can't even write runes, all I can do is cook. Speaking of which. If you ever need feel hungry after extensively studying your magical treasures; come by the cafeteria and I'll whip you up something nice." said Da Bao.

"Thanks, it's nice to be praised once in a while. All my father ever does is criticize my tinkering with magical treasures. At least someone appreciates my hobby." said Da Bao in a depressed manner.

Da Bao's father was the current head of the Crouching Dragon family. Their family had always been a security and delivery agency; and Da Bao was set to inherit the family business. But to his father's disliking, Da Bao was obsessed with magical treasures and spent all his days and money crafting the things. And so his father sent him to the Skyward Sword Sect to train under his old friend, Chen Si.

Not wanting to press matters further, Chu Fan simply nodded in understanding.

"Now, it's getting late. Let's go to sleep as we'll be busy tomorrow." yawned Da Bao.

The two returned to their beds and Da Bao blew out his lamp.

Chu Fan had laid down and rested his head on his pillow. He was about to shut his eyes when he saw a glowing light appear from underneath his pillow. This light was from the Mandarin Duck Parchment Paper he had gotten from Huang Mudan, the night she thought that he was Zhu Zhong.

He had kept if because he knew that Zhu Zhong, in his quest for revenge, cared not for trivial things like love.

Knowing that Huang Mudan would get hurt in the end. Chu Fan didn't want her to suffer and was willing to pretend to be Zhu Zhong; despite the pain he would feel.

In the darkness, Chu Fan grabbed the parchment paper alongside pen and ink; he acted like he needed the bathroom and headed outside with a lamp. He found his way to a gazebo in the dorm garden.

He excitedly unfurled the Mandarin Duck Parchment Paper to see Huang Mudan's message.

" Brother Zhu Zhong, Have you arrived at Skyward Sword Sect yet? It's been a week since I've been here. Have you been eating well? The sect doesn't mistreat you right? If not then tell Chu Fan that I want him to take good care of you for me. I miss you very much. And I know I can't cry anymore; and that I need to be brave like you. Do you miss me too Zhu Zhong?" wrote Huang Mudan.

The corners of his mouth twitched as he was a tad bit enraged. This girl truly only cared for Zhu Zhong and cared not for him at all.

Angry he wrote, "We've arrived here safely sister Huang Mudan. I am eating well thanks to Chu Fan and the sect is very nice to me. I miss you too as you are my most precious sister. Chu Fan thinks of you everyday. He says that you two are engaged and that he'll grow strong enough to protect you; you'll never cry a tear for as long as he's alive. I think he really means it." he proudly wrote.

Chu Fan waited for a couple of minutes until he got a reply.

"Brother Zhu Zhong, don't believe Chu Fan's words. He is a grand trickster. Those words of our engagement were only a joke he planned out with my father; father would never give away his most precious daughter away so readily. If you were to be the one to ask for my hand; I'm sure father wouldn't mind having you as a son-in-law." replied Huang Mudan.

Chu Fan clutched at his pained heart as he nearly coughed up a mouthful of blood. This ridiculous girl was so blinded by her own unattainable romance that she was willing to turn a blind eye to a boy that wholeheartedly loved her.

He decided to move on and ask her questions.

"What is keeping you up so late at night? You should be asleep by now, it's not good for your health to be staying up so late. Aren't you afraid of being punished by your seniors?" asked Chu Fan.

"I'm just feeling lonely, Zhu Hua is in another branch of our sect and I'm still getting used to the new environment. My seniors are very nice to me and my master says that I'm a gifted cultivator with a promising future. I was watching the moon and suddenly thought of you. Are you watching the moon also?" wrote Huang Mudan.

"That is very good to hear Huang Mudan. I was worried that you would get bullied; that takes a lot off my mind. As I was also watching the moon; I, too, thought of you when the Mandarin Duck Parchment Paper started to glow. It is late and I have a lot to do tomorrow. It pains me to stop chatting but we'll have to delay this conversation until another time." wrote Chu Fan.

"Okay, Brother Zhu Zhong, we'll talk another time. Goodnight." wrote Huang Mudan.

Folding the parchment paper, Chu Fan placed it in his robes and got up to make his way towards his dorm.

He was stopped by a figure a little taller than him. This person had fair skin and tied their hair in a knot.

The figure approached Chu Fan and showed its face, it was Yao Lingyan.

"What were you writing? Are you ratting me out?" questioned Chu Fan.

"Who would I tell? I'm just a lowly servant. The most I could do is probably to blackmail you for money." said Chu Fan.

She grabbed Chu Fan by the collar and came in close to his face.

"If you so much as breathe a word about my true identity as a girl, I'll have my men torture you in ways that'll make you beg for death as mercy." she coldly said.

Taking a deep breathe he inhaled the scent of the girl holding him.

"Pervert!" she yelled as she let go of him. She backed up in fear of what this perverted kid would do to her.

"I could never do that to the princess of a demon sect." said Chu Fan as he bowed to Yao Lingyan.

Shocked, Yao Lingyan took a couple of seconds to re-examine the boy in front of her.

"H-how do you know that I'm the princess of the Lunar Fox race from the Northern Nation?" Yao Lingyan said in a panic.

"Because you just confirmed it." he claimed with a sly smile.

"Y-You! Ugh!" exclaimed Yao Lingyan.

Rubbing his palms together he began to laugh.

"Want me to explain right? I know that you're not who you say that you are because of many things. First, when you first came here you dressed too elegantly for the occasion; your choices of color were too vibrant for what's in style. This means that you have no knowledge of our national trends. Secondly, your scent is one of a distinct females. Even when masked with a man's scent, faint traces would still be given off. The seniors of the sect most likely already know you're a girl. Thirdly, for the sect to accept a disciple that they knew was a girl means that you have a very powerful backing. I merely had to guess that you were a princess and you gave me the rest of the information I desired." He sported a smug smile on his face as he mocked Yao Lingyan with every word.

Stunned silent, Yao Lingyan, tried to re-examine the fatty in front of her. She had underestimated him entirely and tried to intimidate him earlier, only to fail. She resolved herself to keep an eye on him from now on as he was a possible threat to her.

She had been allowed to go study under a sect after begging her father to allow her to go. She had heard stories of heroes in the cultivation world but never had the chance to go; she had an innate yin body which causes her to have fits of cold spikes with her body temperature. It would affect her every 15th day of the month.

She had convinced her father to let her come learn yang-attribute cultivation methods to cancel out her cold sickness. And so she was sent to the Skyward Sword Sect under the guise of a boy.

The king of the Northern Nation feared for his daughter's innocence so he had her choose Forest Peak; because it had the least number of male disciples compared to Scorcher Peak.

"You can trust me though. I only wish that we can become friends in the future. And I know you have your reasons for keeping your gender a secret. Your secret is safe with me." ensured Chu Fan.

Unconcerned, Chu Fan walked past, the still dazed, Chu Fan and made his way to the dorm.

"Hey, wait for me." yelled Yao Lingyan.

She ran to catch up to Chu Fan; and he waited for her.

And the two entered their dorm and went to sleep. Finally concluding the day.

A new day had finally dawned and Chu Fan woke up extra early. As he had been a servant to the Zhu Family, he was accustomed to waking up early.

He headed towards the cafeteria and entered the kitchen. Clapping his hands he notified the 108 puppets.

"Wake up, it's time for work!" he shouted.

One by one the puppets eyes lit up and the greeted Chu Fan.

"Good morning Head Chef Chu Fan. What are your orders for today?" the tallest puppet announced.