16 Chapter XVI

There is mention of rape in this chapter, so if you feel uncomfortable, you can skip it.

Eight years ago:

Vanessa and I went to see Sherlock: The Game Of Shadows. I loved the first one and since Nessa adored RDJ, it didn't take much time to convince her to go watch it with me. The movie ended around 22.00 and we parted ten minutes later. She went straight home, I, however, decided to pick up myself something to eat. Dad wasn't home and I really didn't feel like cooking. I craved Indian food from this small place that was always open, so that was where I went. I was walking past one of the many dark side alleys when I heard a noise coming from it. It sounded like a muffled cry. Or a scream. I detoured to check what was happening. The alley was too dark to see anything clearly. Or at all. There were two silhouettes standing against the wall. I heard a moan. Oh, shit. It wouldn't be the first time I walked in on someone having sex, but I still wouldn't like them to notice me. I would have left if I didn't hear another cry. Not one of pleasure, but of pain. Only then I realized what I was really witnessing.

"Hey!" I yelled because I couldn't think of anything else to do.

I came closer to the figures. I was in such a state of shock, that I could just stand there. Luckily I snapped out of it the second later and had every intent to fucking kill the guy that was forcing himself onto this girl. The moment he registered how close I got, he pushed the girl away. She collapsed on the floor and he ran away. There was so much adrenaline flowing through my body that I could probably run after him, catch him and rip his dick off without breaking a sweat. But I knew he wasn't my priority. The girl laying on the dirty concrete, almost unconscious, was. I kneeled down to her and tried helping her sit up. The moment I touched her I knew, it was a mistake. She flinched away. I was panicking. I tried talking to her, but she was shaking and crying. Her dress was torn at the bottom and at the sleeves. Her arms were filled with bruises, probably from her trying to defend herself and I bet if I could see her face she would have a blue eye or something worse. The thing that made me almost puke though, was a streak of blood dripping down her inner thigh. With shaking hands (that almost dropped the phone twice) I managed to dial 911.

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I have been waiting for any news about her condition for about 2 hours now. Her parents came and sat beside me in the waiting room. They practically interrogated me about what happened, but I don't think I made them feel any calmer. I just told them how I found her, to which her mother bursted into tears, leaving the father to comfort her and visibly holding inside a massive amount of emotion. I was at the end of my rope. I have already gone to the bathroom three times to cry my eyes out and I didn't even know her. I even puked.  I couldn't imagine how her parents felt. When the doctor came, my heart was pounding out of my chest.

"Mr. and Ms. Savoy,"

They looked up to her with fear in their eyes. The doctor made eye contact with me. I instantly knew she will not be beating around the bush.

"Your daughter was... she was raped."

The mother, who was obviously in denial until now, clenched her husband's hand.

"Vaginal tearing was not too severe and will heal quickly. Other than that and a couple of bruises, she is alright. Physically. I do suggest psychological treatment as well. In the cases like this, the sooner, the better."

Her mother was sobbing again and her father nodded to the doctor.

"She wants to see you."

Her parents stood up, but she stopped them.

"Not you, him."

I looked up from my lap, where I have been staring for about 10 minutes now. Parents were naturally not very thrilled by this.

When I entered the room I was feeling probably more nervous than ever before in my life. I didn't know the comfortable distance, so I just stood about five meters from where she was laying on the bed. I didn't know if I should start talking or if I should just wai-

"They told me you are the one that called 911."

"Uh, I d-, um, yes I did."

"Thank you."

I nodded.

It became quiet again.

"What were you doing there? Were you with him? Did you know him?!"

Her voice was laced with anger and accusation.

"N-no. I went to see the movie and then I just wanted to grab dinner, so I was on my way to this Indian restaurant when..."

I stopped myself abruptly. I was breathing like I just ran a few kilometers and felt like that too. But instead of physical exhaustion, I was completely emotionally drained. I felt so idiotic. I was complaining while talking to a rape victim. I can't believe myself sometimes. 

"What did you watch?"

My eyes were on her now.

"Uh? Sherlock Holmes. The new one that just came out. 

"Was it good?"

"I personally liked the first one better."

Silence. I sat on the chair meant for visitors on the other side of the room.

"What's your name?"

"Aron."

"Aaron?"

"Aron. My parents wanted to make my life harder I guess."

She smiled weakly.

"Kara."

It's a nice name.

"Nice to meet you."

I felt like everything I said was the absolute worst thing to say.

"How old are you?"

"17."

I was afraid to ask, but she told me nonetheless.

"I'm 16."

"Oh."

16? That's young. She was still a child.

"I know, I look older right?"

I wanted to disagree, but she continued: "He thought so."

I gulped. There was nothing I could say.

"Did you see my parents?"

I nodded.

"How are they?"

"Worried."

That was an understatement. Her eyes fell.

"Do you want me to get them?"

She shook her head: "No. I just...I don't need them to tell me I didn't listen. Because I know. They've always warned me about things like that."

"They wouldn't..."

"Maybe it is my fault. They always told me not to drink and walk alone in the city. Not to go to strange bars or clubs. Not to wear short dresses."

Her eyes were filling with tears. I stood up to come closer, but stopped myself and sat back down.

"No. Even if you were blackout drunk and naked, he still wouldn't have the right to...do that to you. And saying stuff like this only makes him and trash like him more powerful. This is in no way your fault."

I was breathing hard and if I didn't stop digging my nails into my palm, I will probably start bleeding. 

Her amber eyes were wide.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"No, it...It's just that it feels like it is."

I had no idea what else to say.

"But thank you for saying all of those things."

After that, the silence became more comfortable. We stayed like that for a while.

"Do you want to speak to your parents?"

She shook her head: "I would rather just talk to you."

That kind of surprised me.

"Why?"

"Because I don't know you. Right now, it's just easier to speak with someone I don't really know."

I was quiet for a moment.

"So...Do you like Sherlock?"

That was stupid. Her lips twitched into a small smile: "I read a lot of the books."

Our conversation started flowing and almost instantly felt natural. I don't know how long we've been talking when her parents burst into the room.

"Kara!"

She locked eyes with me and was visibly nervous. I gave her a reassuring smile and stood up. 

"Where are you going?"

She asked when I went towards the exit.

"I'm going to give you some privacy."   

I thought that was pretty obvious.

"No, stay. Please."

Her parents were staring at me. I felt like her mother, especially, was burning holes in me with her gaze. I slumped back in my well-cushioned chair. I didn't know what to do with myself while her parents were trying to converse with her. I felt beyond awkward.

When the doctor came in saying she has the test results, I stopped playing with the hem of my shirt and started paying attention again. But seeing her face, my stomach dropped. She had an awful poker-face. It wasn't good news. She turned to Kara and her parents: "I would like to talk to you. Alone."

The last part was for me.

"He can stay."

"But..." tried her mother.

"He. Can. Stay," she repeated.

"As you wish. I'm afraid it's not good news."

I didn't even realize when I stood up and came closer to her bed. Kara was scared. I could see that.

"You are pregnant."

My eyes shot to her. She was completely pale. The room was dead silent.

"We can arrange the procedure for tomorrow, so this can all be over quickly."

I felt a little more at ease hearing that.

"An abortion?" asked her mother.

"She looked horrified. The doctor picked up on that: "Don't worry. It's a safe procedure."

"I don't want to do it."

"What?!" I couldn't hide my shock.

"I don't want an abortion."

I made eye contact with the doctor.

"In these kinds of cases, it's advised to abort the pregnancy, since the trauma of having a child in these sort of circumstances, women tend to be psychologically and physically weaker, which can affect your health and that of a fetus. Especially considering your age."

She shook her head.

Her mother squeezed her shoulder lovingly. Did she look...pleased? The fuck?! 

This time the doctor spoke to her parents: "This is about your daughter's health. I don't recommend she keeps..."

"She said no!" the mother snapped.

The doctor sighed: "It's your choice in the end, I can't make you do anything."

Kara didn't respond.

"Thank you, doctor. We would like to speak to our daughter in private."

"Of course."

Before going she gave me another worried look. I felt like now it was on me to try and convince her.

"It is the right thing to do. And I'm so proud of you," her mother said softly.

I couldn't contain my annoyance at this screwed up situation: "Are you crazy?! You should be advising her to go through with it!"

"This is a family matter. I would like to ask you to leave."

"Do you really want to have a child?" I asked Kara while ignoring her mother.

"Yes," she didn't sound convincing.

"This is your life, don't throw it away. Get the abortion."

"It's a life! I can't destroy a life."

Her bright eyes sparkled with tears.

"But you are ok with destroying your own?"

"It's a human being. It would be a murder."

"It's a bunch of cells at this stage. Not even that. He doesn't know you, it has no brains, no organs, nothing."

I could see she understood my point.

"Don't listen to him, Kara. People like that only think of themselves," her mother said. Voice like venom.

"She should be thinking of herself! It's her body. What she shouldn't be doing is having this fetus just to please you."

"Get out!" shouted her father.

"Dad stop it."

"I said get out. I don't want you and your obnoxious attitude anywhere near my daughter."

I gave him an angry look and gritted my teeth, but did what he said.

Before I left, however, I wrote my number on a piece of paper from a small notebook laying on the bedside table and handed it to her.

"If you need anything just call. And please do what you want to do, it's not their life, you might be risking."

I left the room, hoping she will listen to me.

I was happy when she called me a day later. She asked me to visit her in a hospital and I eagerly obliged. The next three days, after school, I went to her. We talked like we've been friends for years. I didn't mind sitting beside her when she had to talk to a psychologist, social worker and I even managed to convince her to talk to the police. Nothing came out of that investigation. We still have no idea where or who was that man. Kara said she doesn't want to know. After she was released home she called me a few more times, but then abruptly stopped. I thought I will never hear from her again, until eight months later, when I received another call. Hearing her voice again made my heart jump in happiness mixed with relief.

"I have a son."

"Congrats. What's his name?"

"Timothy."

I smiled: "It's a nice name."

She chuckled: "I thought so. Um, I am sorry for not calling for a long time."

"I'm just glad you are calling now. How are feeling? Are you alright?" 

"I'm...Ok. I'm cool."

That sounded convincing.

"I called you because, um, I was wondering if you...If you would like to be Tim's godfather."

I wanted to say something, but word got caught in my throat. I was surprised, ecstatic, honored, scared and absolutely baffled all at once.

"Uh, Aron? Are you still there?"

Shit. I didn't realize how long I've been quiet.

"Yeah, yes, sorry, I am."

"If you don't feel comfortable..."

"No! I would be honored, it's just... I didn't expect you to think of me."

"You're the only person I would ever ask that of."

There was silence.

"When's the Christening? You should know that I was not baptized and am not religious. I hope that doesn't disqualify me."

Somehow I knew she was smiling. She gave me the church and the date. The first moment I met Tim, as absurd as it sounds, I knew I will adore him. And I do. But I do not regret telling Kara to get an abortion. Even though I love him, I would do it again. This may sound messed up, but it's true.

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"Is it my fault?"

He asked while I was tucking him in.

I sat beside him and brushed through his hair with my fingers.

"No. Listen...Your mom will be completely ok in two days. At most."

"Misliš?"

(You think?)

"Vem." 

(I know.)