10 Truth ?

Shock. That was what I would describe my feelings right now. At that very moment I stood still like a stone statue and stared at my father with a rather lifeless face. It took me some time to regain my consciousness. But when I finally came back to myself, I absentmindedly moved my head to my right and left, as if I was still tired from the aftermath of my deep slumber.

From the outsider's point of view my family, except for my mom, looked rather relaxed and unconcerned even though they just revealed one of the biggest secrets in history to their own flesh and blood, which could possible change her whole world completely to the point she wouldn't recover from it for many months. But only close acquaintances and people who often interacted with them, knew the real meaning behind their faces. Many would agree strongly that their cheerful and warm personality didn't match well with their expressions. When they showed concern, they looked unconcerned. When they went to battlefield, they were emotionless. When they were happy, they didn't smile, but instead only their eyes widened and sparkles literally shone on them. Smiles were rather rare, only on important and special occasions they unconsciously showed such "normal reactions". My father had many difficulties to communicate without being misunderstood in his youth. On top of that he was also someone who didn't easily open up his heart to anyone, since trust must be gained in his opinion, and in addition to this he also talked very little. Rather he didn't know how to begin a conversation. That's why he became known for being the "ice guard" in the kingdom. "Ice guard" stood for his status as protector of his kingdom and his cold attitude. Like my father my brother was also expressionless and shy, so finding a suitable fiancé ended up to become a quest over time similar to finding the Santa Claus. Somehow I could see myself in them, but in comparison to them I still knew how to properly interact ...hopefully. Never mind, the issue here was:

The key to discover their feelings lied on the eyes.

So then I saw them I could only become more dismayed than before, slowly forgetting my own feelings which had emerged in me moments ago. Why did I react this way, you asked? The reason was that behind these round emerald eyes, I found small hints of desperation and deep concern.

I asked myself consequently.

What made them look this troubled ? The truth about who we actually served as our god ? Are they worried for me because of this ? Shouldn't I be the one more desperate and upset ?

At this moment something made click inside me when I finally knew what made them like this in the first place. I pursed lips and became slightly frustrated.

Why didn't I consider this too ?

Just how many years have they been trying to hide this fact from me ? They must have many worries piled up on their shoulders. How many times did they want to tell me this truth ? How many times did they feel guilty every time seeing me ? .... For how long did they regretted this after my death? I soon believed that this could be the actual cause for their attack on the royal family which possibly led to the so-called treason as written in the story.

During my thought process I suddenly recalled something important and my eyes widened as a result. I quickly turned my eyes to my brother alone and furrowed my eyesbrows upon looking at one of my most precious people.

My sudden behaviour caused questions forming inside him, so he looked at me worriedly. So to end his confusion, I now directly asked him," It seems like you aren't shocked about this as well. Rather you was more concerned about me than about this fact. Why do you know of this, Leon ? "

Through my words he noticed that I had no doubt about him already knowing the truth before me.

For his reply he just said that he was only worried for me, since I experienced too much pain, thus he didn't react that strongly at that time. In some way it was plausible to behave like this for his loving sister,... but normally once you got to know such information, shouldn't you be first confused and then become concerned about me ? However he wasn't the slightest astonished like me at that moment, rather he even tried to avoid my suspicious gaze before.

So to make my statement clear, I concretely explained my disbelief.

A small flinch followed by my brother and he now nervously moved his eyes to my father desperately asking for help. For a second I thought that I saw sweat forming on his neck a bit.

Ehh? Why are you so nervous ? It wasn't like I would kill you, if you didn't tell me?

My father was quick-witted, so it didn't take long for him to finally catch the message. To save him he now adopted the role in replying for his son, " He was already old enough to understand that time. Your mother and I decided to tell him after he became 20 years old, so with you."

Upon hearing this I became shocked and unconsciously hold on my skirt, preventing me to ball my hands into fists.

This was around the time I was executed. So they wanted to tell me this ? ....But it came too late.

Did the author planned from the beginning that I shouldn't notice this ? He/She should f*ck himself/herself. I was really angry right now.

Unbeknown to me, my mom misunderstood my reaction as wrath for a specific other reason, so my mother immediately apologised to me and explained that they were just afraid that I would become too dismayed by this truth. Thus their thought was it to wait until we were mature enough to take it in. But since I became 20 sears old even before my execution, I should have known this by then, however I still didn't find out. The cause was the archduke mansion. Because of many works and assignments I didn't even have any free time for myself, therefore there wasn't the right time to personally tell me. So I couldn't completely blame them, as they just showed consideration for my strict schedule. But due to this I died without getting to know of it unfortunately.

To take away their concern, I shortly reassured them, that I fully accepted the situation and fact of my newfound god. They became relieved and small warm smiles plastered on their faces.

Come to think of it, in my childhood I always learnt magic by only one of my family, be it by my aunt or my grandpa. What I didn't understand at that time, was why I didn't get to know our special magic until I became 14 years old. Even after that I wasn't allowed to use this magic phenomena. Rather I couldn't even create it. I first thought I didn't probably possess the ability, but as all my family members had the same issue, I soon set aside this problem and believed that this was normal in my family. Besides nobody used it frequently, so I thought that nobody would notice this anyway. More like many citizens resumed us being so strong that we didn't need the special magic at all. That's why nobody questioned us before. Nonetheless I still asked myself why I wasn't permitted to learn it. Now that I knew of our god, I finally found it out.

I was happy now, as I finally took away one stone from the castle called "huge confusion" , which was built after my return. However my biggest concern still lied before me. Not controlling my hidden curiousness I quickly asked,"Why did Apollo need our god first of all ?"

To this my father raised his eyebrow and sighed heavily, " Just as I thought I could finally sleep soundly now....you had to add new trouble, have you ?

Did you mean the help thing ? Yeah,... Sorry, dad. But you just had to mention this. Naturally I would be curious, was my thought.

Like everyone in this room, nobody wanted to stretch this conversation longer than necessary ,since everyone already became mentally exhausted, especially for me.

So without any roundabout, my father began to speak, " You now know, that we actually served a different god." I just nodded.

Then my father slowly breathed in and out and took on a serious expression.

"Our god is Selene, not Apollo." After I heard this I became stupefied. For a while I blanked out, trying to process everything, but slowly came back to my senses. To become really sure, I asked him again:

" Selene was a goddess ? I didn't hear from her. Did she actually descend to the earth ? "

" She indeed was. Only the citizens didn't know of it," replied my father, " She was the goddess of the moon."

What the f*uck ?

My confusion which showed itself on my face indicated for my father to further explain, not knowing the actual reason for my bewilderment.

" All citizens here knew the goddess Artemis, the twin sister Apollo and moon goddess too. So this naturally confused you. "

Of course, some even would think that you were crazy. You could be possible arrested for lying if you wasn't the general at the moment. Due to the strong bond between the siblings, Apollo and Artemis, this statement could cause punishments. Something like this was seen as betrayal and denial to their own god in this kingdom. Apollo loved his sister dearly, so for someone to put her name in his mouth had to be careful with his words.

The mood goddess didn't possess a country like Apollo, however she was still a very powerful figure. Only a few gods, who didn't descended to the earth yet similar to her, became still known to us, mortals, because of their achievements and immense power. That's why sometimes I asked myself why they still didn't have a kingdom yet ? This question could only be answered by someone otherworldly. Thus I just focused on our conversation instead and asked further,

" What was the connection between Selene and Artemis , except that they both are moon goddesses ?"

My father replied, " Actually in fact , because Artemis was also a moon goddess precisely created this problem here ?

" Did you mean that they dispute over the title Moon goddess ?"

" Not exactly, but in the way yeah."

This didn't make sense. It wasn't like other gods didn't share similar titles before by looking at the multiple names in every mythology of different countries.

He understood my confusion and replied, " It was all because of Apollo."

"We all identify the moon goddess as Artemis, daughter of Zeus and Leto, and twin sister of Apollo. Didn't you ask before why the people didn't know of her , but us? "

I nodded and awaited for his answer, but what came out of his mouth made me speechless.

" Apollo erased every memory about Selene on the earth."

This ability was the special magic of our royal family: The erasing and manipulating memories. It wasn't exactly the special magic of the citizens, more like byproduct created by Apollo. Few people could also use them to some extent, but it didn't show any reaction on their own people as it was automatically blocked. Only the royal family were strong enough to use even on their own citizens. A trait mark who the real royals were. This helped underground operations like collecting Information.

Without prior notification, my father proceed with his explanation leaving me behind with my thoughts.

" We just forgot her, since nobody wrote anything about her existence in any books or the papers were burned to ashes. Apollo erased her very existence from our brains .Only the royal family and us knew of her ."

I could somehow catch up with him and made the question:

" Then why couldn't we tell the people about her ?"

" It's because natural disasters could happen if we tell them of her . I will tell you more about this later on. Now I explain how it came to this"

My father soon began to narrate the story between the gods:

Before the founding of our kingdom Apollo, the son of Zeus, didn't acknowledge Selene as the goddess of the moon, since Artemis, his twin sister, was also the goddess of the moon. On top of that our goddess even joined the Olympus and his sister not, so out of anger he covered the truth by burning the memories about the existence of Selene from everyone|as heads through any means. Zeus allowed him to do it, since he loved his son dearly like Apollo with Artemis."

"However Zeus also loved Selene at the same time and longed for her since long ago. To gain her acknowledgement and to protect her rightful seat in the Olympus, he secretly wrote her existence on the scroll for the next generations. Only the royals and dukes could read them. Naturally, Apollo found out about this and became enraged. But he couldn't do anything as this was the order of the supreme god, so he reluctantly follow his words. Zeus was upset to decide who's side he had to take, thus to find the perfect balance, he finally warned the living creatures on the earth not to tell about Selene to anyone, except for the trusted people who could read his writings. We knew it because she is our goddess in the first place. That's why only limited people knew of them. "

" What had this to do with our family exactly? Also...Not marrying the royals ?", I asked as I recalled the question last time too.

" It was because our blood wasn't compatible with the blood of the royals ."

" Heh? ".... What? I couldn't make out what this meant.

My father continued, regardless of my confusion:

" Unbeknown to most, only few very powerful gods who didn't have own kingdoms could actually descent to the mortal world. ... You know, these and other gods had feelings too, so they also could fall in love even with mortals. Therefore some would even give birth to half-gods who had abnormal strength and power. Royal families were descendants of their god, the nearest children of their gods. They helped to connect us with our gods. That's why our royal family had the strongest connection to Apollo, because they were descendants of the half-god. But not everyone in their family possessed the same strong blood of their ancestors. Today only the emperor had the strongest connection to Apollo.

Do you remember the romantic story of Artemis and Endymion ?"

How did it change to this topic ? But if this helped to find out, I should just answer this:

" Ah yeah. Artemis fell in love at first sight because of his beauty and thus longed for him immensely, however Endymion instead fell in love with the goddess Hera. With the help of Zeus Artemis could put the man in an ethereal sleep, remaining deathless and ageless, so she could always kiss him whenever she wanted .

This way she gave birth to 50 moon priestess who now resided on earth. "

" But it wasn't Artemis, who fell in love with Endymion. It was actually Selene, the goddess of the moon .

Around the time where Apollo tried to erase Selene's existence from everyone's head on earth, the goddess of the moon had an affair with the mortal Endymion, the son of Aethlius. She knew Zeus loved her, while she wasn't in love with him. But she couldn't go against him and soon accepted to act as his temporary play toy. Therefore she hid her lover from the supreme god, afraid that he could hurt her most loved one. The love triangle began, when Selene was suddenly attacked by Apollo's crows during her visit on earth, however she was saved by none other than Endymion. He comforted and stayed by her side for a while. Over the time they soon fell in love with each other and gave birth to three sons and one daughter. One day Zeus found out about this and became enraged, so he tried to kill Endymion and their offsprings. Only the second oldest son survived in this massacre and could flee.

After that Selene was caged in a mortal body as her punishment and now lived under Zeus' surveillance, so she couldn't meet her son, but before she became a human, she gave her blessing and power to her last surviving son. Thanks to this he could change his appearance, only his eyes remained as this was the only thing that he inherit from his beloved father, his emerald eyes. Then he went on a journey hiding himself from Zeus. Until then Zeus couldn't find him anywhere because of Selena's power.

On his travel he made many comrades and one of them was our ancestor. He was loyal to the second son. The second son also regarded him as his own brother. The days were peaceful, but even that didn't last any longer, as Apollo and Zeus finally found him.

Our ancestor tried to protect his best friend until he himself became victim of their dispute and died by Apollo's hands. The second Oldest became so angry, that he cursed Apollo who killed his own comrade on a blood moon where his power was the strongest. The result was that Apollo now became unable to go down the earth and had to wait for one of the Selena's descendants to free him. The curse could only break when one of their descendants and the descendants of Apollo got married and gave birth to a healthy child.

Even Zeus couldn't do anything against the strong curse and had to bitterly watch his son being caged leaving his own kingdom on his own. Fortunately his offsprings were wise enough to rule over the country. A characteristic of Apollo.... Even though he could be sometimes unwise when it came to his sister. Due to this Zeus soon gave up on his hunt of Selene's son, as this person was now the only salvation for Apollo.

After that tragic the son married the sister of his best friend. The family's name was Ainsworth."

Wait, did this mean that....

"...To sum it up, we are somehow blood related to the moon goddess .

The words how to free Apollo were delivered through generations in our family ." , answered my father, concluding my thoughts.

Oh, what an interesting story. I took everything back what I thought about the author, and the cursing. It ain't boring, ... if this was actually written in this d*mn book ( sarcastically), I thought to myself.

" Each kingdom need the god to flourish. As soon as the god couldn't descend down to the earth to give their blessing and our kingdom could dry out in the next future to the point of destruction.

Around the time our family gained recognition and trust from the royal family, we already made measurements for this. We must release Apollo was our driving thought."

One question still lingered in my brain, awaiting to finally come out. So I let it go.

" Oh, I understand . So... but you first told me our blood wasn't compatible, but we had to still marry them ? Before you also stated we couldn't marry into the family too? You just make me confused now." , I said my complaint, as I finally gave up to understand.

" To release Apollo we need a marriage, but as Apollo despised Selene and as Selene's blood flows in us, it was pretty hard first to find a good match. Some of the royals always reacted with goosebumps showing on their skin whenever we touched them. This was no good for producing an offspring. The current archduke had a relative low connection to Apollo, so he was a great choice for us."

" So that's why I had to marry the Archduke ? "

"In hope it could save our kingdom somehow."

" Oh my gosh …."

" Please wait, how about the princes and the others in the previous generations ?"

" After many attempt to connect them we noticed one thing that we shared. ….Our ancestors didn't love any of the royals, so they couldn't produce any offsprings. So they normally divorced. The royals and us still had to force some on them to do the ...deed. However as long as I remember no children came out as this was part of the curse too. The key was love to finally gain one. "

" Was love that necessarily to give birth ?" ,if you think biologically. Cough*cough*

" In our family ,yeah , this was a trait from goddess of moon ."

Yeah, why did I ask anyway. Nothing seemed logical for me. Therefore I just heavily sighed .

" And because I somehow developed feelings for him, his majesty and you hoped for result. I'm sorry, dad. But the archduke didn't love me at all. He already have a lover on his own.

" No problem, perhaps next time. Besides I couldn't bring myself to force this on you, if you were unwilling."

" Then when did the multiple marriages begin anyway ?"

" It was round 60 years ago, when we noticed that our harvest became very bad for the first time in history. We knew since then, that it has begun. To take early measurements we first tried to engage my older sister with the prince, but my sister didn't love him, but her childhood friend. So this was the first fail. Later on our cousin came into the play and we continued it until his highness gave up. His majesty was the first one in history to get his engagement annulled and divorced many times by now. In some cases he was also heartbroken too till the queen came. His majesty had the strongest connection to Apollo, but was willingly enduring it as his younger brother, the previous archduke, also had the same strong reactions to us unfortunately, besides he was just ten years old that time what could you expect from him... Still with him we also had to play the marriage and divorce game. ... I remembered many tears flowing down their cheeks....Hahaha."

After hearing this, I felt empathy towards his majesty and thought my father was really sadistic. Wait ?! Right now a thought crossed my mind and I asked panic- stricken :

" The both didn't feel resentment towards us, right ?"

" Fortunately they didn't feel any resentment, but rather had only embarrassment when seeing his ex-wifes and ex fiancés every now and then...hahahah... It was just after few attempts that we knew that love was missing for producing offsprings, so it couldn't be helped ."

"….Was the divorces and annulments also the reason why some people in the capital speak bad about us ? "

" Perhaps yeah, nobody wants to see his majesty like this ."

" Why did the royal family forbid us to do something... against our rumours ?"

" The reason is to distract the capital from the actual problem . "

"…. So they used me as distraction…. Are they kidding me ?" Was this why the rumours didn't stop here ? , I asked myself.

" That what I told him too. His reason was : <<We will explain everything to you after Apollo is free again>> . It made us frustrated. But right now we could only wait till then . "

" He didn't revenge us because of the marriage thing, right ? ", I asked again to be assure of it.

" No, he loves you, he even wished you as his daughter in law, but he got three daughters, so marriage wasn't possible anyway. ...Only with my son. But this will be tricky anyway.", he said while looking disappointed at his son, who in return avoid his gaze.

The way my father just calmly told me their reason, was pretty suspicious for me. Shouldn't he be more angrier in this case ? Perhaps over time they just accepted this fact, but I couldn't let go of this feeling, that there was more into this. My next question which was connected to my intuition came in :

" But he knows that because of the rumours our marriage didn't go well, right ? For the success they should have gotten rid of it completely from the capital by clearing the statements. There must be another reason ."

As his reaction my father just stayed quiet, probably thinking about other excuses. It just confirmed my hunch.

There must be another reason for sure, but my father didn't want to tell me.

… Well. I'm fine with the current information for the time being. Now I just wanted to rest and organise my thoughts.

" Okay, I take it as it is for the time being .", I said, releasing my father from the interrogation.

My father let a small sigh of relief. Upon seeing this I thought, how could they survive in politic if they openly showed their feelings to me moments ago. Again... only few knew their real emotions behind their strict faces. Even for them was it hard to read their countenances. I was just too good.

" So after this drama , how about you go to sleep now? I'm sure you are pretty tired by now,", my mom said ending this whole conversation. I nodded and went to my room.