53 Goodbye as usual

"I would like it if you stay away from anyone with Frigore's blood,".

Klein looked around as if he sensed something, mumbling a certain spell. "Why? Because somehow they seem to be unusual?,".

My uninterested tone seems to perk him up. His eyes glinted with anger, resentment. Because he knows that when I talk in this fashion, it means I am hiding my actual intention. "Master, I know how suicidal you are. And I know Frigore had the answer to put your soul to rest. But...your soul doesn't belong here. In time, I will bring you back. So don't kill yourself...if you do, then you can never go back,".

I raised my eyebrows. Go back? Back to where? Home? I don't have a home.

No...maybe I do. Was it...my world? Ryann's? The world where apparently I have a handicapped lover?

Klein huffed in annoyance. "He's here...there's a lot to catch up but we can't do it if we keep being disturbed like this,". He crouched down to my level and stares at me, this time with resolve.

"Master. Leave this place and that demon boy. If you want answers, I will gladly accompany you to Frigore,".

All the answers are in Frigore.

Klein stood up, dispelling the mana surrounding us. With this, the barrier that I felt around the basement dissolved. "I'll come for you tomorrow night. Have your things ready,". He smiled and bowed, disappeared like a mist.

I stood up, feeling slightly shaken up by how quickly things unfolded. The only thing running in my mind now is not my curiosity or anxiousness or how quickly I want to know the answer to my many reincarnations and the answer to death

but my family, friends and Vance.

It's been awhile...this feeling of emptiness. Ever since I got reincarnated into Carina, I've never felt so empty. I have a family I've been wanting to have, servants who are my friends and Vance's unconditional love and attention. All this time, I've never been attached to any of my lives, because I know I won't die and I am going to keep on being reincarnated.

This time, it felt painful. I thought I've grown numb to this feeling. After all, I always die leaving people behind, then watch their deaths the next.

"Why....why can I never own the life I want," I covered my face, crying.

With my hand on the wall, I guide myself towards what seems to be an exit. But when I opened the door, I found myself to be back on the carriage.

"Carina!!!," a loud bang on my carriage door jolted me from my thoughts.

I tried to wipe away the tears but it was too late when Vance opened the door. His face darkened with worry when he saw me.

It was the first time he saw the woman he loves cry. All this time, he believed she's a strong and capable woman, with a steely gaze but a warm heart.

Vance's uneasiness quickly disappeared when he knows what he has to do next. Without asking anything, he wiped away the tears of his beloved. His heart wrenched in agony, for all he wanted is to see her smile.

"It'll be alright, as long as I am here," he said, hugging Carina tightly.

Little did he know, what was running in Carina's mind is how to leave this man behind.