A crush

Huh? Wait? 'People he cares about'?

Sir Windsor is obvious, but didn't I just include myself into that as well? Where did all of my 'I don't deserve to be cared about' worries go just now?

Airing out my past seems to have helped a bit… Huh. Would you look at that!

"Lady Amy… Did you go into your own world again?" Prince Horus seems to have found his composure, and asks in a bit of an amused voice.

"Yes!" I say, proudly. It's not like I can change from one day to the next, but admitting to myself that my old reality wasn't that great to begin with seems to have helped a bit for now, at least.

"Lady Amy, you mentioned something about the girl maybe liking this teller of stories person?" Prince Horus seems like he wants me to talk more about it, but I kind of regret bringing it up to begin with.

Oh heck, let's just get it all out!"

"Well… There really wasn't much more to it. I just, I mean, the girl from the totally fictive story, just seemed to keep her distance whenever the person tried to close it. And now it's too late anyway…" I say, feeling a sudden sense of loss.

Right… I had a giant crush on The Author… And if I had to look past my insecurities and anxiety, I'd say there was a good chance for The Author feeling something like that towards me as well… But I kept pretending not to see it out of fear of her noticing how worthless I was… But at the same time I couldn't stay entirely away from her… Which meant I had to trick myself into not noticing my crush in the first place… Just treating her like someone far away… So much mental deceiving, and in the end I just tricked myself.

"I just…" Tears stream down from my face in a heavy but silent manner.

"I just realized how much I really loved her…" I say, as I feel like I release a heavy burden from my chest.

Oh Author! I miss you… And I'm sorry I never told you how I felt…

"Her?" Prince Horus asks, looking a bit perplexed. Oh, damn! I mean! It's not damn, but it's still not good, I think? Or is it?

"Yea, in what feels like another life" I say, being a bit doubtful about how I can wriggle my way out of this, as it doesn't make much sense with the timeline he knows. Since it was literally in another life this happened, though the feelings was taken with me to this place. Getting reminded of her all the time.

"I once wrote a story about two flowers dancing" He says, in a weird and straightforward way.

"With Sir Windsor. We got in trouble and was forced to clean the entire ballroom!" He says, smiling a bit as he seems like he remembers back. Huh? That's weird… Something here is weird… This was obviously not included in the original novel, but I feel like I heard about this before…

Right! The Author mentioned she had planned a few special chapters she would publish at some point, with one of them being about two flowers! Which didn't make much sense at that time, but it makes total sense now, with that damn children's book.

I can see why they would get in trouble in this world. Two flowers dancing would basically be a kind of GL story? I really want to read it! And just the thought of Prince Horus and Sir Windsor having written it!

Huh? Know that I think about it, how come they didn't write about two suns?

"Why not two suns?" I ask, curiously, as it would make more sense, considering who they are.

"Two Suns?" He looks at me utterly confused as well as gives me a stare asking me if I'm stupid. Well I'm sorry if the answer is obvious, but it isn't obvious to me!

"Lady Amy… You constantly make me question your intelligence… Have you ever seen two suns?" He asks, as if it's the most logical question in the entire world.

"Uhm, no? But I don't see what that has to" I start, but he interrupts me.

"How can we write about two suns, when there only exist one?" His voice tells me he is being serious. Hmm, it seems like the children's book is at it again with dictating the minds of these people.

'There can't be two suns, as the one true sun is the strongest, brightest and greatest, and will not be in a competition with anyone' or something like that. Molding their minds, so even when Prince Horus was thinking outside the box, he still couldn't get over that hurdle.

"But wasn't it fantasy?" I ask, feeling a bit weird about asking this in a fantasy world. MY fantasy world.

"Fantasy?" Prince Horus sighs more than asks, is this another word that doesn't exist?

"I fail to see how it being fantasy or not has anything to do with two suns" Prince Horus just says. Oh, the word does exist, then. However, something is weird again. The way he says it, is like the very definition of 'Fantasy' is somewhat different from how I would define it.

This would partly make sense, as the traditional fantasy in a fantasy setting wouldn't be fiction, but reality. So what kind of meaning does Fantasy have in this case?

And why do I keep getting more questions than answers? I'm so tired! And hungry!

"Hey Prince Horus, give me some food. Crying made me hungry" I say, trying to sound like some kind of gangsta', failing miserably. He doesn't argue, and just goes out. Haha, food.