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I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please

Superpowers abound. Villains rule the world. A transmigrated dork that has absolutely no idea what’s going on. Strong-armed by the Superhero Enhancement System into the thankless job of endlessly performing good deeds in a world where such actions are often met with violence, Lucas Lynn doesn't have much choice in regards to using his supposed gifts. It’s bad enough having to pretend to be a supervillain, but how exactly does Boss System expect him to save the world with only the help of a homeless orphan, a dog that’s smarter than he is, and a yoyo? Oh, just trick some supervillains into becoming superheroes instead? You make it sound so easy! ----- Tags: Sci-Fi, Isekai, System, Dark Comedy, Satire, Superpowers, Anti-Hero, Time Looping, Gore, Slice of Life, Rubber Ducky (yes, Mr. Quacks deserves his own tag) ----- Do a google search for "Geminel WordPress" for a page that has a little about me, information about the novel's inspiration, a link to the discord server, a link to the character reference sheet, a char art gallery, and a collection of short stories, both within and independent of this novel's universe. ----- Excerpt from the end of Ch1: [Bzzt... Scan complete. Analyzing...] 'Eh?' [Analysis complete. Positive value found, now loading... Loading complete.] 'Okay, WTF is...' [Binding successful. Congratulations upstanding citizen. You have been selected by the Superhero Enhancement System. Please select your desired enhancement. The following options are avail...] 'I'M DYING! IS NOT DYING AN OPTION!?' [Error, invalid selection. An enhancement will be randomly selected. Randomizing... Strength has been selected. Enhanced strength will be calibrated for your rebirth. Please look forward to it.] 'WHAT IN THE ACTUAL F-' With this final thought, Lucas dies in a pool of his own blood on the sidewalk.

Geminel · Sci-fi
Not enough ratings
244 Chs

Please Prevent Pending Personal Propensities for P Proclivity, Posthaste

As Lucas is stuck debating between vine-covered trellises versus conventional hedges to surround the fencing of his several-acre fantasy animal sanctuary, the service bot has returned with a small multi-tiered pushcart.

The bottom shelf has five boxes, namely those of the three tablets and two phones. The middle shelf has a large selection of potential cases for the tablets, and the top shelf bears the array of cases for the phones.

Right after Lucas decides that the vine-covered trellises would probably be a bit too pretentious, the service bot stops the cart right in front of him. Barely a moment later, Jonathan is standing on the other side of the cart, facing toward Lucas but his attention is down on the nanogel phone case designs. Before the cart is even at a complete stop, he has already started going through them, re-stacking them in some organization method his brain has arbitrarily decided is acceptable, at inhuman speeds.

A few seconds later, he has finished his endeavors on the top shelf, crouches down, and rearranges the tablet cases in a similar fashion as well.

Thanks to Jonathan's efforts, everything is separated as solid colors versus patterns. Initially, it's sorted by rainbow color order, eventually transitioning towards brown, then black leading into white, and finally silver into the other metallic colors, with clear being the last. The patterned ones are in the same order based on their base/largest color.

Once Jonathan has completed sorting the tablet cases as well, he stands back up to actually pay attention to what the patterns available even are.

At first, Lucas was amused by watching Jonathan's actions, but by the time he had finished with the phone cases he actually started looking at them instead of watching Jonathan go over the tablet cases too.

One of the first ones to really catch his attention makes him laugh, so he grabs it and holds it out to the once again standing upright Jonathan.

"Here you go, it's Mr. Quacks fan merch." Lucas chuckles a bit after saying this and holds out the light blue case with multiple cartoon yellow rubber duckies scattered across it towards Jonathan.

"Oh! Actually, I kinda like it. Hah, then you should get this one!" Once Jonathan accepts Lucas's nomination, he reaches over and lifts up a bright red case with cartoon dog bones all over it, printed in white with thick black outlines.

"Hells yeah! Do they have the same ones in the tablet cases too? Hey Willy, which one you want?" Lucas accepts the offered design as well, setting his and Jonathan's selections off to the side.

Willy freezes in place, in the middle of chewing on an itch on one of his hind legs in an awkward position. Once he collects himself, he leaves the three false supervillain likenesses where they are and trots over to the cart.

Willy can almost comfortably look at the middle shelf from a standing position, but puts his paws up on the edge to hold himself up for a better look. The service bot doesn't give any outward reaction to the dog casually shopping for himself, though it does watch his actions in a way that could be considered curious.

Willy noses his way through the pile, pushing some aside to get a better look at others. After some time of very serious deliberations, he gently picks one up with his teeth and walks over to Lucas with it, tail happily wagging the whole time.

The selected case, now enhanced with a little bit of dog slobber, features a light brown background with dark brown giraffe-style spots all over it. The dark brown is a similar shade to his own dark patches, most likely influencing his decision. After submitting his choice, he returns to the chew toys and continues diligently attending to his pressing pup profession proceedings. Particularly, pouncing upon the poor phony Josephine copy.

The service bot gathers up all of their selections, as well as the similarly patterned red and blue tablet cases too, bringing them all over to the checkout counter, then beginning the formal transaction. It just leaves the cart off to the side, out of the way for now.

"Do you have an existing account with us? Would you like your new devices activated as well? If so, would you prefer a new number, or do you have an existing number you wish to continue using?" As the service bot asks these routine questions, Lucas freezes for a brief moment.

'Oh whoops, I'm not sure what carrier the original's phone was with, and trying to access his memories is a major chore. You got any way of checking for me?'

[...Just have him scan your ID and find out.]

'Oh, yeah, right.'

"Ahem! Well, you can just do a scan for my information. Yes, I'd like everything activated. I'll use a new number. Uhh, you want a new number, Jon, or..?" Lucas cleared his throat a bit too loudly before finally answering. He trails off his question as Jonathan had begun nodding as soon as he said "new number".

"Very well, sir, please scan now." Obliging the service bot's request, Lucas pulls up his left sleeve a bit as he's unsure if the strange material might interfere with the scan.

Info is exchanged, phone number decisions are made, a fresh SIM card is inserted, the case is mounted, you know the drill. No one needs to read those details, come on now.

As Lucas accepts the prepared phone, he pulls out the perilously pricey portable supervillain phone compilation. (Sorry, I'll stop it, for now.)

Lucas casually holds the card out with his left hand, typing in the information on it with his right thumb.

The service bot begins unboxing Jonathan's pending phone, noticing what's in Lucas's left hand right when it was about to turn to face Jonathan and begin his process.

"Mr. Lynn, if you are affiliated with a major supervillain organization you are eligible for discounts. Do you wish for this information to be listed in your database entry?" As the service bot asks this, it has already begun typing in a series of letters and numbers into the register.

Once it has completed its entries, the customer-facing display now shows a line that says "Affiliation: MF -10%" and the overall price listed has been reduced accordingly.

"Oh uh, wait a second. We're not part of, uh, we're just friends with MF." Lucas seems to have temporarily stolen Jonathan's speech patterns, feeling awkward about turning down a discount, but also not wanting to be wrongly associated with any real supervillain organization.

The service bot makes a show of looking at his face, looking at the card in his hand for a few seconds, then looking up at his face again. After a few more moments, it just continues preparing Jonathan's phone, making no movements to remove the code.

"Do not worry Mr. Lynn, affiliation data is only available to others if you explicitly consent to it." The service bot has turned the listing of available phone numbers over for Jonathan's perusal while giving this comfort.

'Uhh... Why is it being stubborn about this?'

[Anyone that would dare call themselves friends with Mind Flare would surely have his backing, and one glance at the card is all the proof needed. If Mind Flare had reason to believe you were denied the affiliation discount, there would potentially be a bloodbath if he's in a bad mood at the time. Even if it isn't alive, the service bot surely knows it shouldn't unnecessarily bring that kind of negative attention to its higher-ups.]

'Oh... Hah. When you put it that way...'

While Jonathan is contemplating which number he wants, which he is putting a lot of thought into, he takes off his suit jacket and unbuttons his right sleeve, rolling it up past his elbow. Whether he's doing it just because Lucas did, or if he also had similar guesses, only he and 011 know.

Once his scan is complete he adjusts his sleeve again and puts the suit jacket back on, not really paying much attention as the service bot continues its tasks.

When the phone is good to go and dressed in the ducky case, the service bot holds it out to Jonathan.

"Here you are, Mr. Millard. Do you wish to separate your portion of the transaction, or will it be a single payment?" As the service bot asks this, both Jonathan and Lucas are frozen in place for a few seconds. Jonathan recovers first, accepting the phone as if there was nothing unusual going on.

"Oh, uh, um, just, just one transaction. Um, thanks." Jonathan's acting doesn't include his speech, as he reclaims his stutter from Lucas's temporary theft.

'Right... I never asked him what his last name was. Millard, huh? He seemed pretty uncomfortable with being called that though, and I don't think it was just because it was revealed to me? Guess that's why he never bothered telling me it though, if he doesn't like it that much.'

[Probably reasonable assumptions. Surprising, coming from you.]

'Gee thanks, jerk.'

[Anytime.]

-----

Lucas kills this chapter: 0

Lucas total kills: 7

Lucas deaths this chapter: 0

Lucas total deaths: 10

Lucas current GDV: 8.78 (+.01 net change)

Lucas's fame level: 2.5* (Mostly just local)

Lucas's hero suspicion level: 1* (Only highly paranoid people)

Jonathan kills this chapter: 0

Jonathan total kills: 5

Jonathan deaths this chapter: 0

Jonathan total deaths: 2

Jonathan current GDV: 1.91

Jonathan's fame level: 1.75* (Just local)

Jonathan's hero suspicion level: 1* (Only highly paranoid people)

-----

Little character theater:

Jonathan has become fully engrossed in starting to customize his phone, distracting himself from the hated family name.

Willy is lying on his back, holding mini Mind Flare up in the air with his front legs, seriously contemplating how to bite it next.

Lucas, finished with entering in all of his new contacts: Wait, is it implied that Jonathan gets to add these too, or was it supposed to be just for me?

427, stopping a moment to consider the question: [It's probably implied that you should share it with him, they already considered him your sidekick it seems.]

Author, counting a tally with their fingers: Hmm, 9, 12 aaand then 11, nice.

Mr. Quacks, pleased and amused that Jonathan's last name is only one letter off from mallard, a dignified species: Quack!