The after math.

Kelly's pov:

While me and him where dating let's call him W for now he had a best friend let's call her K for now.... I told him time and time again that she had feelings for him and each time he said that he could never go there that she was just a friend.

Well a week after me and W broke up he started dating someone else and you could never guess who... it was her K his "friend" there is nothing more hurtful then when the person you love dates the person they told you not to worry about like did I not mean anything to him, the whole time he told me not to worry was he just lying to my face, did he cheat on me is that why he felt bad for breaking up with me and this whole time I had thought it was my fault... and it wasn't it was his, I had done nothing wrong.

I messaged him 2 weeks later just out of curiosity i.e jealousy ...ha...ha... :(

Only for him to tell me that she cheated on him like for real he left me and got cheated on now that's just fucking KARMA....not gonna lie I laughed so much that my ribs hurt but anyway soooo me and w started getting close again and we put everything behind us coz I mean why not the feelings were definitely still there... damm I should of not been so dumb....anyway bout a month later I finally said it and told him that i still had feelings for him and this BITCH really turned around and said that he was happily talking to someone and that I should of told him sooner LIKE BITCH U THINK I WASTED A MONTH OF MY LIFE TAKING TO YOUR DUMBASS TO JUST BE "FRIENDS" HELLL NAWWW AND THEN HE BLOCKED ME.....like wtf I ain't do shit.

And so the ⭕️ begins again back and forth.. damm I wish someone would of saved me from this cycle.

I messaged him on ig and was like ok have fun although I was hurting inside but I mean it is what it is :( :(

2 months later they were still together and all I could see on his Instagram feed was pictures of them going out to eat, sleepovers and I was breaking like whatever was left of my heart was slowly dying every picture a chunk gone like magic... 🙄well if magic was cruel... anyway so I posted a recent on Instagram and sent like an @ thing to everyone on my recents list and W just so happened to be one 🤷🏽‍♀️ completely by accident... I had no malicious intent at all and tbh I had moved on with my life kinda... well by moved on I had a friends with benefits if you understand-what I mean 😏 and he took away the pain and gave me a whole new feeling No sadly I wasn't in love with him and it was just lust but that's not really important is it, what's important is I was happy well actually not happy but content for a time just going on with life without trying to end it but anyway we'll come back to that subject a little later on 🤷🏽‍♀️ anyway back to the situation he popped up to me and we started chatting just as mates and he flirted a little and then his gf added me on Instagram and started messaging me she asked what me and W were and if I had feelings yadda yadda yadda you get the drift... and she was obviously jealous in the end I just said to her that I wasn't intrested in having W in my life I called him an it.

Not on purpose but I just meant like the whole aura and situation and of course she got defensive and said that I couldn't call him an it and to be honest the whole convo was pointless I had school the next morning and it was 4:23am and I was to tired and I just really couldn't be asked I simply said that she was obviously jealous and I threw in that me and him had a happy relationship and oooh did that stoke the fire she was mad 😂😂and I was content I then told her goodnight and I went to sleep....

forgetting about the situation...

the next morning however she messaged me saying that I was a slut and all I wanted was sex and I just laughed in her face coz she was being a child like grow up.. anyway she said some things and I sent her a picture of my half eaten sandwich and asked if she wanted the rest of them leftovers too and I was in tears 😂😭😂it was too funny she just didn't say anything after that.... not gonna lie I'd say I won that confrontation and W messaged me and apologised and I just said I didn't need the apology coz I don't deal with children and I then ignored him. He messaged me several times throughout July and October he even wished me a happy birthday which I declined I just had been to hurt by him to be honest.... and I...I just didn't know if it could be fixed it would be like trying to stay afloat at sea because I felt like I was drowning seriously it was so bad that I no longer wanted to live even months after we broke up I felt suicidal and none of my friends could help me..SHIT.. most of them were clueless because I could hide emotions well.... the first time was over a bridge I stood over the ledge looking down and the steel drop to the solid ground looking through my memory's and I messaged just one person who was important to me and just as I was about to jump do you know what that person replied back to me with.....

8 words..

Your my best friend and I need you

And that was all it took from the right person to change my mind. I went home and gave my mum a huge hug and that's when I realised that if I had jumped the pain I would of caused her and I felt guilty and so instead i live my life for my mum and she is the only reason why I am still alive.... she is my strength.

November 2019 he messaged me and what he said was so shocking .....