1 Rollercoaster (pt1)

"What don't you understand? Let's breakup!"

His voice echoed in my head the whole way home, every time I took a step was agony. The tears wouldn't stop rolling down my face, no matter how hard I tried to stop them. At that moment I didn't care about everyone staring at me, some faces filled with pity, some with mockery, I couldn't be bothered with them right then. All I cared about was going home.

It started raining, I couldn't care less, all I could think of in that moment was him, how badly I was tricked by him. Five years, for five years I supported him different ways, when he needed emotional support, I was there for him. When he was short on funds, I gave him all the money I could spare, sometimes I would forgo eating for days on end just to give him so more money.

"Hahahaha..." I couldn't help but laugh at how naïve I had been, I should have noticed it. Whenever he was with me his attention was always on his phone, he never cared about my presence. He always smiled so gently and when I turned his attention back to me, his face would turn blank and his mood would visibly turn sour.

I finally reached my one-bedroom apartment in Tokyo, sopping wet and shivering. My forehead was burning, but then again, that is what happens when you wonder around aimlessly for over an hour in the rain with no umbrella or rain jacket.

I unlocked the door and entered. I took off my shoes and changed into house shoes. I made my way to the bathroom, stripping the soaking wet layers of clothes off. After a hot shower and taking some fever medicine, I lay down to get some sleep.

I was woken by my blasted alarm disturbing my sleep for the umpteenth time since I got it, I don't know what came over me to buy this annoying thing but it can occasionally be useful like when I am late for work, like I am right now.

"Be quiet" I whisper shout at the alarm, and for some reason it complies with my wish for once. I get suspicious when I don't hear it again for a while. I squint reading my phone screen and nearly have a panic attack when I see then time.

The 6:00 am displayed on the glaring screen literally stops my heart from beating for a few seconds.

"Flip, I'm late for work" I start to talk to myself when I am under stress. I begrudgingly get up out of the warm covers and half awake, drag myself to the bathroom. Splashing some cold water on my face helps to wake me up a bit. I mentally go over what I need to do to get ready in the time I have left to get ready and decide that I have to skip breakfast to get to the office building where I work in time, again.

I sigh at my fate. I hate not having breakfast because I usually won't get to eat again until I finish work at 8:30/9 pm. I look at the clock which read 6:20, and run into the kitchen. I fill the kettle and boil it while rummaging for a snack bar or something I can stuff in my mouth while running out the door.

avataravatar