9 Chapter 9

Peter and I, we both had breakfast together. I didn't try to look disturbed in front of him. So, I just acted as nothing happened.

It was around 11 am on that day, he went to bring launches for both of us.

Then I went to visit the consultant, I went to his department and I met him. As I didn't want others to know about my ailment, I went to confide to the doctor that I wanted to know about the ailment first and then I would like others to know about it.

The doctor said that you might be inconvenience after hearing it that's why I wanted to inform your parents first.

"If this is the issue then I would tell you. Listen very well and don't be upset, okay?" The doctor said.

I replied, " Okay, I won't be upset."

I was sweating a lot due to nervousness. My heart was scrambling. But I wanted to know about it and I believed that I could handle and overcome it.

"You are HIV/AIDS positive. We came to know about it from your blood test report." Doctor said.

I was shocked. I felt like the land under me fell down. I didn't see anything.

I was wondering how could I be AIDS positive. My mind was filled with lots of questions. I couldn't get any clue in my mind.

"I am just around 20 years old and I didn't do coitus with any random guy then how can I be...??" I shouted at the doctor.

"I want to do the blood test again and see the result," I said to the doctor.

"Our blood report can't be false. We have very high technology in this city." He said.

Again I told him that I wanted to do it right away.

Then he took me to the lab for relinquishing my blood. I was really scared that I forgot about Peter totally. I was ashamed of myself.

After deducting the blood, I sat down there for a long time. I was energy less and I was just shocked by which I couldn't control myself from overthinking.

I wanted to cry louder there but I couldn't. I just walked the corridor of the hospital and I really didn't know where I was going. I  was just kept going on and on.

I was just thinking what would I tell to my parents? From where was being I AIDS positive?

I reached outside of the hospital. I looked around me, I saw my patients and their families who were smiling.

I saw everyone around me was happy because they didn't have anything to worry about.

They didn't know when and where what would happen to them. They were just enjoying the time that they possess.

And seeing them, I was too depressed. I wanted to be graduated, to be job qualified, to help my parents on their living basis, to get married to the person who loved me very much and to have children of mine.

"I wanted to be the pride of my family but now! look now!!! what I am," I shouted.

Then, I cried again and again. I just sat on the surface and just glazed the whole day. While the dusk was transpiring, it started to rain and everybody around me went inside.

I didn't even know that it was raining and I just sat there continuously. I wanted to kill myself. I was just perceiving the misperception of people regarding HIV/ AIDS.

Rain persistently fell down.

And I was mad towards God and my fate, shouting and crying in the mud.

I didn't see any path to move forward in my life. I felt like my life came to have a big full stop. I was totally desperate. My vitality had lost its spirit.

I didn't eat anything from breakfast time. But I didn't feel anything else happening on my body. I just remembered that I stood in the rain for a long duration.

Unexpectedly, I came to know that the rain on me and around my place stopped to fall. I was wondering what it was.

Then I turned my head to see, I realized that it was Peter.

He was completely soaked in the rain and holding the umbrella above me. I saw his eyes were red, he was looking at me with care.

And I couldn't control myself, I jumped to hug him tightly and I started to cry loudly.