1 Simula (Prologue)

"How's my baby?" tanong ni Evi habang nakatingin sa ultrasound machine.

"He's doing great, next week magpa-admit ka na for delivery." sabi ko habang iniikot ko ang probe ng ultrasound machine sa belly ni Evi. Sa susunod na linggo na kasi ang scheduled delivery nya.

"Excited na kong makita at mahawakan si baby Zee" masayang sambit ni Evi.

Well actually, I named the baby kasi gusto ni Evi na ako daw ang gagawa ng name kasi ako daw pinaglihian niya. She's just my patient but when I met her for the first time we instantly clicked. Kahit sobrang opposite naming dalawa, I enjoyed her presence because she is very madaldal, makulit and malambing na friend. Meanwhile ako ay tahimik, seryoso and hindi pala ngiti.

"Are you sure you don't want to inform your baby's dad?" seryosong saad ko sa kanya habang pinupunasan ng tissue yung belly niya't nililigpit ang probe ng ultrasound machine.

"Why would I? I don't even know him and I can handle this by myself." sambit ni Evi habang naka upo na sa bed.

I know that she's lying because I can tell by her actions and eyes whenever I ask about her baby's dad that she knows him. Hindi ko alam ang rason niya't tinatago ang baby sa kung sino man ang ama nito but I respect her decisions and I don't want to push this issue any further. If kaya niya maging ama at ina para sa kanyang anak then I will support her.

"Ella let's eat lunch together ha?" pag-iibang topic ni Evi at excited na tumayo at kinuha ang kanyang sling bag.

"I can't"

"Bakit? Sige na please" paglalambing na saad ni Evi sa akin at yumakap sa aking kanang braso.

"I have a meeting with my department head by that time." seryosong sambit ko sa kanya habang tinatanggal ko yung gloves.

"Ikaw talaga, ginagawa mo ng mundo itong hospital." Sabi niya sa akin habang binitawan ang aking kanang braso at inilagay ang kaniyang mga kamay sa baywang. "Go out and enjoy the outside world Ella, there are more great things in life that you need to enjoy." dugtong pa niya.

I smiled at her and said "I appreciate the thought but this is my world and I am proud of it."

"Hindi lang dapat ito ang mundo mo Ella, don't deprive yourself of being able to feel and savor the life that you deserve." concern na sambit ni Evi sa akin.

I get her point but the only thing that I knew of is being an Ob-gyn doctor and nothing else. Ni minsan hindi sumagip sa isip ko na mag enjoy and party like what my friends are doing. Hindi naman ako loner dahil I have friends at paminsan-minsan gumagala kami kaya lang sobrang mga wild nito at parating pumaparty. Besides may ibang priority ako at yun ang maging next department head.

"I don't have time for that Evi." saad ko sa kaniya at tumalikod na't naglakad patungo sa pintuan. Pinihit ko ang doorknob pabukas pero before ako maka labas ay may sinabi pa si Evi na ikinatigil ko.

"Someday Ella bibigyan ka rin ni God ng chance para i-enjoy mo lahat ng bagay na deserve mo." huling rinig ko mula sa kanya at tuluyan ng umalis.

I let out a sarcastic laugh while walking away from the room that Evi and I were in. How funny. I don't believe that God will give me a chance because nung kailangan ko sya at nagmakaawa na wag munang kunin sa akin ang aking mga magulang at grandparents ko ay hindi niya ako pinakinggan.

While I was reminiscing about the moments of how desperate I was asking God to spare my parents at grandparents before, my phone rings. Chineck ko kaagad at tinignan na video call from "FokFok Shats" I let out a sigh and answered the call.

"HellllOOooo everyoneeeeEEE!!!" - Varina Torres, my Model friend.

"Hoy Varina! Lasing ka na naman, parati ka na lang naka-inom pag kinakausap ka namin ha" - Sophia Molina, ang Psychiatrist kong kaibigan.

"Long time no hangout mga ka FokFok girls" - Lucy Salas, the Architect.

"Hoyyy sumagot si Ella, himala ata ah"- Zara Tan, Chef and CEO of their family restaurants.

Naka full volume pala yung phone ko kaya yung mga patients and mga tao sa hallway ng hospital ay tumingin sa aking gawi. Binigyan ko na lamang sila ng small smile dahil sa kahihiyan at hininaan ang volume ng phone ko.

"Why did you call?" mahinahon kong tanong sa kanila dahil ang kukulit nila parang tumawag lang at naghahanap ng karambulan.

"Wala ka talagang pinagbago Dr. Divata, ang cold mo pa rin sa amin." naka pout na sabi ni Zara habang nag-aact out na nasasaktan

"Bakit kasi kayo tumawag?" I rolled my eyes while asking parang tanga I just calmly asked though.

"Hindi ka pa na sanay Zara. Ganyan naman talaga ang Dr. Gabriella Divata natin dati pa." mahinhing pag-eexplain ni Sophia.

"Wag niyo nga'ng pagtulungan si Ella. I was the one who initiated to call kasi you are all invited to my birthday! As if naman na may choice ako" excited na sabi ni Varina habang humahagikgik ng tawa.

"Yes I am ready! 7:00pm tonight diba?" nasasabik din na sambit ni Lucy.

"Teka tonight birthday party mo?" nagtatakang tanong ko ky Varina. Ngayon lang nag invite tapos mamaya na pala yung party or ako lang bah ang nakalimot?

"Oo, Wow I'm hurt Ella ha. Yan kasi sobrang workaholic mo! And don't forget to bring gifts ha, no gifts no entry policy" pagbabanta ni Varina sa amin

"I'll try to go Varina and I won't promise that I will be there. If ever I can't be there, ipapadelivery ko nalang yung gift ko sayo." I said at tumingin sa wrist watch ko dahil naiinip na akong pumunta sa office nang department head dahil sa meeting.

"Be there please Ella, matagal na tayong hindi nagsasama lahat. Kahit wala ng gift from you basta pumunta ka lang and that's enough for me." magkakaawa ni Varina sa akin.

"Oo nga Ella, pumunta ka naman. We will all be waiting for you." pagpupumilit din ni Lucy sa akin

I exhaled a heavy sigh and napatango nalang sa pagpipilit nila. This one night won't hurt right?

As far as I know, wala akong naka schedule na any delivery procedures or any important events. Kaya I'll just go for a while then uuwi na.

But little did I know that this night will completely change my entire life.

Because of a baby which I didn't bear.

The baby who made me question all my life values and plans.

Which resulted in my story of how I became a MOTHER.