20 Chapter 20

Moon is sitting on the side of the bed where Dr. Santos was seated. His fingers slide across my cheek. The caress feels wonderful on the lower half of my face but the upper half is numb. "Before you answer, you aren't up for anything more than a bath. You're on heavy drugs, and I won't take advantage nor will I allow you to drown. I can stand over you and watch or you can sit in my lap and rest while your muscles get some much needed attention."

Moon watching me in the bath naked seems worse than resting against his body. I'm too drugged and I'm too worn out to think beyond this. "You can be my floaty," I tell him and giggle. Drugs are such a wonderful invention.

Even with my head swirling, I refuse to be carried. Moon protests and tries to lift me, but I bat his hands away. He gives in with a shake of his head. He's accustomed to getting his way, and I have a feeling he's not sure how to handle me. We slowly manage our way to the bathroom, which has a separate door for the toilet area. I use the bathroom while he adjusts the water in the tub. My head is fuzzy, but I'm able to enter the main section of the bathroom and reach the triple sinks without falling. Sadly, I can't concentrate enough to fully absorb the luxury of the room. Moon watches me closely. I hold onto the sink and look at myself in the mirror. A bruised and swollen bumblebee gazes back. My hair is a mess too and it needs to be washed to get it to cooperate.

Moon walks behind me and places his hand on my back. It makes me nervous until I glance down to the side and see his bare feet. It's like seeing him in a T-shirt and jeans. It doesn't match the crime boss persona that he wears so well. His hand slides away as he steps back and whips his shirt over his head. Like a teenage girl, I close my eyes. I wobble slightly and Moon's warm fingers clasp my arm to steady me.

"Turn around," he says gently. I open my eyes and he assists me as I turn. He's standing so close that I feel the heat of his body, though he isn't touching me. His hands go to the button of his pants, and I grip the counter and close my eyes again. The sound of the water filling the tub is loud. It doesn't stop me from hearing Moon's pants hit the floor. His arms close around me, but he doesn't pull me into him. He unhooks my bra and peels it down my arms and discards it. My panties are pushed down too.

I'm in no condition for anything besides a long soak in his bathtub. This doesn't mean that I don't think about all the naughty things I wish he could do to me. He steers me to the tub and I'm forced to open my eyes again so I can navigate getting in. Moon isn't what you would classify as lean, though there isn't an ounce of fat on him. He's ripped with powerfully thick muscles that are perfectly sculpted. He steps down into the tub before helping me in. I'm standing in front of him as we slide into the water. I release a long sigh as the warm water covers me. I'm seated stiffly between Moon's legs and trying to remove the sight of his bare flesh from my muddled brain.

"We need to alleviate your aches and pains so you can sleep." His thick voice rumbles against my ear while he turns on the jets. I groan. "Too much?" he asks.

"No, so good."

I'm too groggy and high to fight leaning back against him. He places his arms around me and his fingers spread out over the tops of my thighs. My head rests in the space between his shoulder and chin. We're a perfect fit.

The bubbles from the jets tickle my skin while Moon holds me. It finally sinks in that someone tried to kill me. Because of Moon, they didn't succeed. There's no holding back my tears. Moon's arms tighten.

"Tell me what's going on, baby." His voice is so soft that I would swear he actually cares. Why are the two of us connected in this strange situation? The police are the good guys and Moon is on the opposite side of the law. He's a criminal, I tell myself silently. And he's the one who saved you, my heart cries back. My defenses have been ripped away by the accident or maybe the drugs. Hell, the combination of the entire week has done that.

"In order to keep you safe, you need to tell me what's going on, Madison." His voice is still soft, but a hint of command has entered his tone.

"No one can keep me safe from this." The words come out on a sob. I've pulled him into a mess and he deserves the truth. "Tell me something about yourself... something good." I'm grasping at anything that will make this bearable. There's this part of me that needs to see Moon as more than a bad man. I don't want to think about the guns and drugs and body count that I know he's responsible for. I need to see his human side. The man who drove two hours in the middle of the night to rescue a woman he barely knows. I want to be more than a hot body and a pretty face. Well, at least a pretty face when I'm not bruised up.

My thoughts are ridiculous, really. I've seen pictures of Moon with beautiful, classy women who I don't compare to. Somehow, I caught his attention and he's willing to risk a lot for me. So why am I so reluctant to tell him that I'm embroiled in a mess of criminals who happen to be cops?

"I had a baby brother." These simple words still my racing thoughts. "His name was Chase." He hesitates before continuing. "My mom would say, 'Chase the moon,' and she'd tickle him. I was five when he was born. I felt so important because my aunt took me to the hospital to wait for his birth. I was so excited and could barely sit still. There were complications and he suffered brain damage, though I didn't understand this until I was older. I knew something was wrong when my father woke me late in the night and asked if I wanted to meet my new brother. I'd finally fallen asleep on the plastic chairs in the waiting room. Chase was connected to machines and in an incubator. While I studied him, my father whispered something to my aunt and she began crying." Moon stops talking and I know he's reliving his introduction to his brother. I remain still and wait for him to continue.

"Chase was special. His innocent smiles lit up a room. And when he laughed... everyone stopped what they were doing to listen. Everything about him was good-absolutely pure. This fucked up world never touched him. Chase lived until shortly after his third birthday." Moon's fingers dig into my skin slightly, and he must realize it because he loosens his hold before I mention it. "I would give up everything I own to have him back. I loved him-still love him." It's a moment before he continues. "My mother. She was never the same after he died. His death was so fucking hard." Moon moves slightly and his next words breathe into my ear. "Chase is my good, baby. The only good I can give you."

I feel Moon's heart beating against my back. It's more than that, though. I feel his heart beating inside of me. He doesn't hide behind walls and pretend to be someone he's not. A

criminal, yes. A man, most definitely. Someone I can trust? I think so. At least trust with the mess I'm mixed into. My heart is a different matter.

I start at the beginning. Not just from a few days ago and what Terry told me. I tell Moon everything about Kennedy from the time I began working at the police department. Moon asks a few questions, turns the water off at one point, but mostly he allows me to tell the story uninterrupted.

When I finish, he's silent until I can't take it any longer.

"It's possible I've created this entire scenario in my head and someone accidently ran me off the road and decided not to stick around. A drunk, maybe." I don't actually believe this.

"Alex called before I woke you up. Penny Dandridge is dead."

I wrap my arms across my chest. It hurts my shoulder, but I don't care. The pain actually reminds me that I'm alive. Moon holds me while I cry. I try to let go of the past. The past that says police are the good guys. I know some... no, most are. The muscle relaxer in my system has my emotions all over the board, and Moon continues to hold me while I sob uncontrollably. Penny, who was starting a new life, died because of me.

"No, baby, not because of you."

I hadn't realized I'd spoken aloud.

He holds me for a few more minutes before he speaks again. "We need to get out of the tub and get you tucked safely into bed. My men need this information, quickly. There are things going on right now that I can't talk about. You're safe here. Your car was towed to a garage and no one will find it. Kennedy will know, though. It might take a few days, but he'll begin figuring things out when your car isn't discovered. He'll know that something went wrong. You'll stay here until this is sorted out."

Even with my foggy brain, I won't allow Moon to tell me what to do. "I can talk to the police now. I didn't know how far Kennedy or whoever hit me had driven. I knew they would have a dispatch radio and it was too dangerous to call them then. It's different now and there's no reason not to."

Moon's voice takes on a hardened quality. He doesn't agree with my opinion and he makes that clear. "You need to understand a few things. I have cops on my payroll. It's part of the fucked up world I live in. Even I don't know who's clean and who isn't. It will take a few days to straighten out the details of who you can trust and who you can't. The only way I can keep you safe is if you are here."

I sit forward and turn a bit so I can look at Moon. I ignore my spinning head. "No one else will die because of me. You have a code of ethics that I can't accept. I won't be part of it."

avataravatar
Next chapter