46 Fresh Start

Life has lots of surprises waiting for you. It changes colours like a traffic pole. Sometimes it's red and next moment it's green. Unless you pay close attention to it, you'll end up getting misled.

" Well..... we kinda like, imagine it..." Stella was having trouble with coming to a conclusion.

" Regina already knows how I feel about you. And it's not your fault that I fell in love with you. It's true that Regina and me have so much in common but that's not enough for us to love each other. On the contrary, you saved both of us to have a loveless marriage." My facial expression became rigid as I continued to explain her.

" It's true that I shouldn't have assumed it. It was really dumb, I admit. Can we just like let it go now?" Yeah sure! Why not, after all I love you so much. This is nothing compared to you divorcing me.

" Whatever." I shrug it off my mind because I was still waiting for her answer. " So? How do you feel about this?" Again I asked her.

" Look Theo, it's not that I hate you or anything—— in fact you have been a good friend to me ever since we got married. You helped me with lot of things and you were genuine to me. But sadly I don't have any romantic type of feelings towards you." Stella's words rang into my eardrums. I knew it was obvious for her, to not have any feelings. Still I just don't wanna let go. I have to keep on trying. And now she even admits that she felt comfortable being physically intimate with me. How can I just let it go like nothing?

If you're comfortable having sex with someone there has to be some sort of feelings. I mean it's true that there are people who enjoys having sex with other people even without having any romantic feelings. For example take me. I had been physical with my ex girlfriends. I never loved none of them and so did they.

Even I slept with Regina so many times but I don't remember I ever felt this good knowing that I had sex with a girl. Seriously I mean I admit that I did had lewd thoughts about Stella. All these years I never felt this much enthusiasm or thrilled about gaining someone's affection.

" But you felt comfortable doing it with me. Maybe there's more to it. You have never thought of having a relationship. There could be a specific reason for that. If it's okay with you, how about sharing it with me?"

I knew something was wrong. When Vincent told me about Stella's past life and how she rejected everyone, there has to be more than that. I believe that Vincent is also unaware of this hidden story.

" There's really nothing to say. I just like to live by myself." Stella looked like her lie was caught but she tried to look normal as if my words were not true.

" Come on! That's bullshit. Even for a once, you did feel the need of another person in your life, and let me clarify one thing. When you start to do more than what friends do, your relationship and feelings automatically changes. It's a fact!"

" I can't just go into a relationship and later leave it. That's gonna make things worse for both of us."

" I'm not telling you to start loving me all of a sudden. I'm saying that you should at least give it a try. Think of me as more than your friend. And coming to that condition which you just suggested, I'm okay with it. Even after all this if you don't feel anything for me I won't pursue you anymore. Everything is in your hands. If you wanna stay, you can. If you wanna leave, I won't stop you. But remember my feelings for you will never change."

To tell you the truth, right now I'm not sure if I'm taking the wrong decision or not. I mean, Ray was friend zoned by Stella but me, I don't even know what to call it. Like seriously how can I just have sex with the girl I love and not receive her heart?

" Fine then, I will give it a try. We are already married and if we can turn it to a real marriage it will be great for both of us. Even I don't want to divorce you since you are the first person I married." Finally a sigh of relief. Stella giggles as she speaks to me.

" No one said that you have to stay with me because I'm your first husband." I rolled my eyes to her childish comment. " I'm willing to provide you with a happy life so, don't worry about the future." Hearing my words Stella starts to laugh and I swear to god, I want to protect this beautiful smile of her. I have taken the most hard step now all I have to do is wait for my results.

I came closer to Stella and embraced her tightly with my strong muscular arms. She has always been a petite person, small and adorable like a little rabbit. I kept on holding her inside the cage of my large arms. Although I made sure that I don't break her tiny frame or suffocate her. Her arms were also embracing my large body. We have hugged each other many times but today it felt so warm and intimate perhaps it's my imagination only. Poor Stella was struggling to stretch her arms around my body frame. Sadly her little arms couldn't reach to the end. It was kinda ticklish but at the same time very soothing.

" We should go eat now. Look at time." Stella reminds me that we have to eat our breakfast.

" Yeah. Let's go." I released her from my embrace and we went to dining table.

It's been a long since we had started to talk. Usually we have our breakfast around 7.00 to 8.00 AM. But the time has already past that hour. It was about 9 am when we went downstairs to have our breakfast.

As we took our sits, Lucy came and served us the breakfast. Stella has prepared the food which I can tell after taking one bite of it.

It was almost unbelievable that we were there, having breakfast together, like we always had. At that moment it seems like nothing happened between us.

I decided to skip going to the office. My head still aches. Stella has her day off. So, we will be spending the day together.

Lucy started to walk towards the door, probably someone came. I wonder who the hell came here early in the morning to visit us.

" Who is it Lucy?" Stella asked her looking at Lucy.

" Miss your friend Ray came to visit."

~to be continued